The Dungeons

*the click of a camera*

Another picture? Mm, I can smell the coffee from here, ( there's nothing quite like it. )

Viktor,

Yeah, I know there's no point writing to someone to tell them to forget about you, and I know there's no point me still saying you shouldn't come and see me. I know better than that. So I'm not, but that doesn't mean I don't wish you would. I mean, some of me wishes it anyway. At least I'm getting pretty good at arguing with myself.

Today Desperate To See You Ron is winning. Think you might come again tomorrow? Other parts of me are going to beat me up later on but I'm getting used to it.

I was dreaming about you last night, but it was one of those mad dreams I'm sure I never had before I was mad and I don't think it means anything except I have to write to you. All I remember is you were looking for a snitch. The early morning guard, who's an ok bloke really, I just guess working here has to get to you after a while, tells me news about your games and so on, which is good on the one hand but gets me dreaming about you too. Can you get me a signed photo for Kevin? I figure I'm going to be here for a while, it'd be better to get along with the guards and Kevin's making noises about meeting you which might get me, I don't know, an extra hour or something. Anything extra sounds good right now.

At least I'm not curled up in the corner wishing I was dead, right? I meant to ask you if the Twins' latest got to you this year. But then when you were here I couldn't think of any of the things I'd been saving up to ask. It's been weird, you know, I think I've been better since that day. I mean, it's something to know what it would be like to look back at fifteen years of nothing, or hardly anything. I guess it seems more important to hang onto stuff, you know. Like you. At least Desperate To See You Ron thinks so and he's going to deck the next me that starts going on about how I should be doing what's best for you.

Think you can bring me a picture of Lily too? Not for Kevin, for me. A new one, I mean. In my head I keep thinking she will look really different already, though not eighteen, I know. Still. If you can.

I haven't got any news, of course. It's all just counting down the days to the trial and trying not to piss the healers off and get on with the guards. I don't see other prisoners, or patients they want to call them. Not yet. Just counting down the days to the trial. Saw the Auror's Rep yesterday and she thinks won't go to bad as long as I'm pleading guilty and the Russians don't make a fuss. Won't pretend some of me doesn't think they should. I would. If I were them, I would. Shutting up before I get going on that, it never helps.

Love you. Miss you. Love you. You really should stay away from me but you're not going to, I know, so come tomorrow?