What a great comment! I'm so pleased you enjoyed the story so much. I like "peevish dudgeon." I think that describes a lot of Ron's adolescence in canon.
I always think Snape seems like the kind of person who needs someone who remembers to feed him so he doesn't get so tetchy, don't you? He can fly with no broom and heal magically-inflicted cuts and invent his own spells, but I can see him forgetting to eat and getting low blood sugar and being a total ass about it.