What a fun story! Given the summary and the first few lines, I initially thought that this would be romantic comedy of sorts*, but it developed into something more bittersweet and less tidy. I'd forgotten until this round of Beholder that Ollivander refused to condemn Voldemort outright when Harry first met him--"terrible, yes, but great"--and you make good use of that in your characterization of him as someone who, expertise aside, doesn't quite know his own moral center. He's not quite right for Pomona early in their courtship, and he realigns himself over the course of the story in a very satisfying way.
Loved the details about the modernizing wizarding world--ready-made wands, new institutions like the Leaky Caudron. Enjoyed! M.
* There certainly *is* something very comic about the long lifespans that wizards have, I'm sure of it!