Hotel Hell Network

If this is the part in the abduction where I'm tortured multiple times and in varying positions for information, you should know that I'll never talk. Yes, even if you handcuff me to the bed and pour Hershey's Special Dark chocolate syrup all over my body while ravaging me for days, I shall not utter a single intelligible word.

I warn you, I'm the sort of hot mamma-jamma that would make your appendages cramp in vaguely suggestive ways.

[Because the Doctor forbade her to sing on the Tardis, Leeloo is now serenading her fellow hotel guests over the network. In Ukrainian. Because she can.]

Has anyone else heard a little girl giggling at all hours of the night?

OMG, can the creepy girl stop showing up in my mirror and asking me who she is. I DON'T KNOW!

Somehow I don't think this is the "rescue" that Bridget was talking about. Not to mention that it happened earlier than intended. Would someone like to explain to me where the hell I am? And to put this theory to rest, is anyone from the Mobius Corporation here? Is this your idea of rescuing us from the train because if so I'm not amused.