So Close, Yet So Far Away.... WHO Morgan Yates and Aurora Greenlee WHAT A "break up" before they were ever together... WHERE Rosewood Manor WHEN Thursday, June 25, 2015 ~2:15 PM (backdated) RATING G
Several days had passed since the start of summer--Aurora's birthday--and what had transpired (or didn't) between them that night. Morgan had no real regrets despite his thoughts of another woman bringing the evening to a crashing halt. It was simple logic; The Hellhound was merely a guard and Aurora a princess. Nothing could happen between them, yet when the sidhe royal had asked him to stay with her for the night, just as they'd done a million times before, he'd said yes. Yet, curled against him, everything was now different between them. So much so that when Evie called him Thursday morning, Morgan gave serious thought in pursuing a steady relationship with the mortal woman. The two of them got on well and Kira had taken a shine to him. Morgan had surprised even himself at how much he grew to care for the little girl. In his service to the Courts, he had little time to pursue a family so he had no children of his own. As the humans were wont to say... Children changed everything.
So, when they pulled up in front of Flynnwood's residence, Morgan finally spoke, "Evangeline called me this morning," he said he shut the engine off and looked over at Aurora with a seemingly neutral expression thanks to the aviators that hid his eyes.
Unlike the Hellhound, the Princess hadn't been stressing over what had occurred the night of the summer solstice. If anything, she felt as if the heaviest of weights had been lifted from her chest. Finally, she'd been able to say the things she'd never thought she should, never thought she could, and the relief was...well, a relief.
Of course, it would have been a lie to say that she hadn't picked up on an unusual vibe from Morgan. Aurora tried to ignore it, especially since they were both treading on unfamiliar territory. Or...well, she was. He'd been here before. And that's when it'd hit her. Despite the fact that he seemed to believe that there was a world of difference between her and Elaine, was he already anticipating it ending the same way? It was understandable, Aurora knew. They were facing a daunting future.
Today, however, they had a meeting with Flynnwood to focus on. So it caught her somewhat off-guard when, out of the blue, Morgan mentioned the baker as they were getting out of the car. Of course, she knew that Morgan had been spending time with the human. She didn't like it a bit, and maybe it had been one of the catalysts that brought her to confessing her feelings for him, but....
"Oh?" Aurora looked over at him even as one of Flynn's guards approached to open her door. "Have you talked to her about...things?"
"She invited me to dinner. I accepted," he said a tone that was matter-of-fact and climbed out of the vehicle, some of the tension leaving his shoulders now that he was free of the moving metal box.
Even though her door was open, Aurora sat there for a moment more, her blue-green eyes focused on the tall Fae as he unfolded his body and stepped out of the car. When the silence that followed his statement stretched on a little too long, she turned and gave Flynnwood's guard her hand, allowing him to help her out of the car.
"You accepted," the princess echoed as she turned her gaze to Morgan once more. She cocked her head, her blonde hair shimmering in the sun, a faint look of confusion crossing her delicate features. "Why?"
While his gaze was hidden due to the sunglasses on his face, there was the faintest movement toward the guard helping Aurora that gave away his shift in focus before it landed back on the princess. He closed the car door and replied in that same matter-of-fact tone, "You know why, Your Highness." Perhaps if he had different lineage, they would be having an entirely different conversation... Or not having one at all. But the fact remained, Morgan was what he was and that was not Consort to Royal Princesses.
"No. I don't." Of course, now that he said it, like that, she had a sinking suspicion she did. But she wasn't going to believe it. He couldn't seriously mean what it sounded like he meant...could he? Morgan loved her. She knew he did. Hadn't he been the one to say he would have waited no matter how long it took?
What was the point of waiting, if he didn't see a future? The fact that they were standing outside of Rosewood Manor, with a small audience, meant nothing to her. "Why?" she asked again. That was two times. They both knew if she asked again, he'd have to give her a direct answer. Aurora really hoped he wouldn't make her ask again.
Morgan had started to walk toward the entrance, hoping that would end the discussion, but he should have known better. Aurora wouldn't let up until she received a satisfactory answer. He returned to the car to rest his arms on the roof and stared at her a beat before finally asking a question, "What am I, Your Highness?"
The Princess watched after him, waiting, and yet when he turned, her heart sank lower and lower with every step he took back to the car. When he asked what he was, she stubbornly returned his stare. "I know what you want me to say, Morgan, but I won't. The way other Sidhe see you...it's not how I see you. What are you? You're the one I want. So now you answer my question. I don't want to ask it again." She also wasn't sure she wanted the answer now, but she had to hear it for herself. Whether he was choosing this because he was afraid of what might happen in the future if they gave it a chance, or because he honestly didn't feel worthy to be by her side, or...because whatever he'd felt for her wasn't enough. But whatever that human could offer was?
By now the other guard was all but forgotten as Morgan pushed away from the car and circled around the back of it to continue his conversation. Pulling the aviators off his nose, he slid them into the inner pocket of his blazer. Staring down at the princess, his stony expression softened and he very much wanted to stroke Aurora's cheek with the back of his finger... But, the last few days he'd been trying to keep things professional between them.
"Aurora," he murmured as he stepped close so only they could hear each other, "I love you so much for so long that I've forgotten when I fell in love with you." The corner of his mouth quirked into a slight smile despite his effort to keep his face neutral. It quickly faded with a shake of his head, "But it doesn't matter how you see me. We could do whatever we wanted here, yes, I would love you all the more for it. But when we return home, what then? The Court would never accept us, a princess and a nobody."
"You are not a nobody," Aurora retorted, though she made sure to drop her voice, just as he had. "The Court can learn. It will take time, but we can change things. We don't have to - " She was going to say that they didn't have to have the same end that he and Elaine had, but she thought better of it. She didn't want to cast dispersions, despite what he'd told her about the other princess.
His smile didn't help, especially when it made her want to reach for him, to wrap her arms around him and to hold on. To remind him just how it had felt, tangled up in each other's embrace, their mouths speaking to each other in ways their words could not. Or would not. It also didn't help that she'd already thought about everything he was saying. She was being optimistic, she knew she was being optimistic, but she didn't know how else to be when everything else led to pain and heartache.
This wasn't any better. "Do you even hear yourself?" she asked, her breath catching in her throat as the color rose in her cheeks. "You love me. You. Love. Me. And I love you. I love you, Morgan." She couldn't help that her volume was growing again. "You're really going to just walk away from that? No. You're really going to choose to be with someone else, with a human, knowing that I'm right here...and that you're the one in my heart?"
If Aurora were anyone else among the Sidhe, Morgan would never have pulled a face of annoyance at her as he did just now, "I know I'm not a nobody. I know that you know that. But us, together, in Faerie? The Court will take too long to try and change, we both know this. But, not only that, how would us affect your mother? If she were to accept us, and that is a very big if, Aurora, it could potentially weaken her position. If she could allow a royal and a mere guard to be together, what else would she allow? And that's not even touching on the fact that it would be political suicide for you." Morgan sighed, stepping closer to the princess and leaning down so that his forehead touched hers.
"I am hearing myself and I think we both know that I am only giving voice to what we know is true." He straightened, his thumb lifting to touch her lips to prevent her voice from getting any louder with the emotion he knew they were both sharing in the moment: Desperation. Morgan was sick with it. What he really wanted to do was comfort Aurora, to reassure her that everything would work out, but it would be a lie and their kind was incapable of it outright.
"I want to be more than your shield, Aurora. I want to be your heart, too, but what other choice do I--we--have?"
He wasn't saying anything she hadn't thought about before, but Aurora refused to believe it. "Too long?" she repeated. "What is time? All we have is time. I don't care how many eternities it takes, I can change it. If Flynn- " She stopped abruptly and sucked in a calming breath. If Flynnwood ruled over Spring and she ruled over Summer, together, the could have worked to turn the tides in Faerie, to expand its horizons. But he'd gotten himself banished...and as much as she didn't want to admit it, she couldn't say for certain that she wouldn't suffer the same fate because of what she wanted. It scared her. It terrified her. It threatened all she knew of her life. But the other option was...what? To let Morgan go?
"I will find a way." Her voice was steely. Determination. Desperation. They bled together. It was the only choice she had. She had to try. With or without him. The soft graze of his thumb against her lips silenced her words, and yet all she needed to say was there in her gaze. Pain. Longing. She couldn't feel his touch, couldn't have him so close now, without wanting him to be close. To be hers.
"I want that too," Aurora said simply. "You know what choices we have. But then...you've already made yours, it seems. You chose her." Evangeline.The easy way out. Something comfortable for him. She opened her mouth to continue, but no words came. There was only the ache in her chest, and it threatened to consume her.
She pushed away from the car, taking a few steps toward the manor, but then stopped and turned to look at him. Her guard. Her Hellhound. Her friend. Her.... "I know it took me a while to get here, to realize what it is I feel, but I never would have said anything if I didn't believe it was worth the risk. I don't give my heart easily - or lightly. You know that better than anyone. You're the one walking away from this. Not me." Her words had grown quiet and thick. She felt so close to tears again, but there was no way she could allow herself to cry right now. What was it about Morgan that made her feel as if she'd lost all control?
"Go." She couldn't quite put a word to what she was feeling, but it made it hard to breathe. It was even harder to look at his face. "I'll be safe here. I'm sure Flynnwood won't mind if I stay for...." She shrugged. He clearly had room to spare, but if it was a problem, she'd have him arrange another suite for her at The Aquitaine.
Her words--all of them--stabbed deeper than any knife ever would. Morgan's decision to pursue a relationship with the human was the only way he knew to protect the princess. It was, after all, his mandate from the highest order of the Court. Admitting and parading their love around to the nobles of Summer would only invite disaster and the Hellhound would never be able to forgive himself if anything drastic happened to Aurora.
As her command to leave was issued, Morgan shut down completely. The pain and longing that was reflected back to Aurora dissipated, leaving nothing behind than the usual cool, aloof, and slightly scowling mask the Hellhound wore at Court. He moved to the driver's side of the car and opened the door, pausing long enough to retrieve his aviators and slid them onto his face but stopped short of getting inside the vehicle. His attention shifted back to the princess as he decided what to do next. Morgan chose his next words very carefully, weighing the risk against the future and decided that it would be worth it to issue the apology.
"I'm sorry," was the only thing he said before he climbed back into the loathsome box of iron and drove away. Morgan had only apologized once before in his entire life and that had been to his family for the shame he'd heaped upon them and it would be a debt he'd never be able to repay as he was never allowed to return to the Autumn Court. His apology to the Summer Princess would incur a debt to her, but his princess wasn't the only one willing to take risks.