InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "It's a sunshine day!"

colemoss (colemoss) wrote in gooseberry,
@ 2017-01-01 14:23:00

Entry tags:

! journal, cole moss

[An image gradually appears in the journal, done in watercolor.]

>

sometimes i think gooseberry is more like home than home. i even miss the lake smell. i'm ready to go back tomorrow.

[Warded to Calvin + Micah + Susana]

how was the holiday at school? did you guys have a good time? did you make a movie??

i miss you. can we have lunch together when i get back tomorrow?? is there anything you want me to bring? [...] not for lunch. just. generally. since i'm not at school yet.

[Warded to Ennis]

i want to go out to the grotto tomorrow so i can prepare the canvas and start planning the painting for anon. do you want to go with me?? it'll probably take a while, but ravi said i shouldn't go alone.

[Warded to Ravi]

after i get back to school tomorrow, i'm going to go to the grotto for a while to paint. ok?? i'm asking ennis to go too.

[Warded to Coralee]

i got your owl. i'm glad you liked the dress and the perfume. and the sweets you sent back were really good. ~~i didn't think you'd~~ thanks. i didn't know you knew how to bake.

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CCMS

colemoss
2017-01-01 10:55 pm UTC (link)

it's not a secret.

he asked what we did when people said no and i said that i try to listen because the people that say no are usually trying to help and usually know better than me. he asked how i knew and i told him that most people know better than me because i'm only good at one thing (art). everything else is sort of confusing. he said i was good at a lot of things and that i shouldn't listen to other people. i told him i wasn't good at lots of things and i asked him if i should still listen to my friends, because i think i should and i trust my friends. he said that i can do a lot of things that he can't and asked if he was my friend. i asked him what he couldn't do and if he needed help, but i told him i didn't know if we were friends and i asked him if he wanted to be. he stopped talking to me after that, though, so i think i might've upset him?? that's why i wanted to make him something.

[...]

i think he's wrong, though. i do think most people know better than me and that my friends are looking out for me, so i think i should listen. like with you.

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evercreep
2017-01-01 11:26 pm UTC (link)

There are so many things I need to address here.

First off, I actually agree with the terrifying mystery creature writing to us through the journals, because you're good at a lot of things. In fact, Cole, you're amazing at most things. I don't know how you missed the memo that you're preposterously handsome and coast through classes and everyone adores you. Oh, and Micah reports you're a good kisser too. Which, of course you are.

On the other hand, it's always a terrible sign when someone tells you not to listen to your friends??? I cannot think of a situation where someone advising you to not heed your concerned friends doesn't have some ulterior motive. And then flipping it to ask "Well aren't I your friend?"

... Although I suppose he wasn't trying to be cruel.

You can disagree with your friends all you like but you shouldn't just stop listening to them. You can tell me to shove off if you want, you know.

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CCMS

colemoss
2017-01-03 01:49 pm UTC (link)

being handsome isn't something you're good at, though. it's just something you are. but thank you?? i think you're handsome too! [...] i know i can do lots of things, but i don't understand anything except art. it all feels like going through the motions or like someone has to tell me what to do or like i'm guessing all the time. like that. it doesn't feel like i'm good at it. and, lately, i've been messing up a lot too. like with the charm (i'm sorry) and the patronus and coralee's first dress for the play. so maybe i'm getting worse at things too. does that make sense?? i'm definitely not good at talking.

well. he didn't say not to listen to my friends; he said not to listen to people that tell me 'no'. he didn't give me an answer when i asked about my friends. so i guess he just thinks i should make my own decisions?

i don't want you to 'shove off', though!!

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evercreep
2017-01-03 08:50 pm UTC (link)

~~You think~~
~~I'm not hands~~
~~Don't joke like th~~
Those were small mistakes. Really, no one is going to remember them. You're taking steps towards improving all of your many talents, and sometimes they're missteps. You're just used to everything coming easily to you. Often times, though, you have to work hard and make things happen, try again, fight. Which you did, ultimately. Coralee got her new dress (at the expense of your health, I note) and the wings worked beautifully for the play. As for talking, you have friends who can do all the talking. I'd trade my ability to talk for your... anything. [...] Do you want to try practising the Patronus Charm? I'll show off my hideous eel for you, and then we can work on finding out what you are.

Hmmmmmm. It sounds like things someone tells you when they want you to misbehave.

Well. That's good, I only mean that you don't have to do what I say all the time.

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CCMS

colemoss
2017-01-03 10:08 pm UTC (link)

it doesn't seem so bad. when you say it like that. thanks, calvin. this is why i should listen to you, though. you always understand things that i don't and you're really smart in ways that i'm not. and you're kind so you always take the time so show me. i wouldn't want you to change either.

[...]

could we try? if you don't mind. why don't you like your eel??

you think? why would anon want me to misbehave, though?

and i know i don't have to.

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CCMS

evercreep
2017-01-03 11:16 pm UTC (link)

[............] I've had to change a lot, Cole. But it's fine, we shouldn't get into it here. Let's just agree that we like one another a great deal and leave it at that.

Oh, I'm fine with my eel. It's a bit funny, though. Not a fish, not a snake... somehow both. Regardless, yes, we can try. After dinner sometime we can loiter in the atrium and work on it.

I don't know. [...] Maybe I'll try talking to it next time.

Good.

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	CCMS colemoss 2017-01-04 07:33 am UTC (link)
	~~but i~~ ok. i agree!! thanks calvin! that's like your old house and your new house, right? do you feel very connected to both, then? i hope you don't miss hogwarts too much. [...] what do you think mine is? you shouldn't have to talk to anon if he scares you, though. i can do it. i'm sure lots of people will do it too and we can just read it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	CCMS evercreep 2017-01-04 10:11 am UTC (link)
	I hardly miss Hogwarts at all. But once you're a Slytherin, you never let that go. Overall, I have to say, Ribbonfin's a great deal easier. As for your Patronus? It's probably something [...] unusual. Unique. No, I want to. Hiding isn't how I handle being afraid. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	CCMS colemoss 2017-01-04 02:19 pm UTC (link)
	i'm glad. that you don't miss it. what's special about being slytherin?? i don't think about being a horned serpent much except that that's how i met micah. oh. probably! i don't know much about animals, except for owls, so i'm not even sure what i'd want it to be. i hide when i'm afraid. [...] what do you do?? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

CCMS

evercreep
2017-01-04 03:44 pm UTC (link)

Slytherin has a poor reputation. When you're in Slytherin, you feel as though everyone outside is the enemy. There's a sense of being better than everyone else, and it's expected that Slytherins are cruel. The values are ambition, cunning, and resourcefulness, but... it's associated with an unpleasant past. Most Dark Wizards and You-Know-Who are Slytherins.

I suppose it's better to go in without expectations. But you'll probably be some colourful bird. Something beautiful.

I fight. Even when it's stupid. That's the root of my problem with Stoker. I get nervous, and then I get angry, and before I know it he's ten times as furious as he was when we started because I won't just shut up.

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