| Witch Weekly's Gossip Column |
[05 Jan 2014|10:37pm] |
Let’s start this week with a blind item! What high ranking royal likes to keep it in the family? I hear that the reason he doesn’t have a wife is that he prefers the company of a close relative. A VERY close relative who has been able to satisfy his rather peculiar urges that we hear frequently calls him Master behind closed doors.
While there have been rumors around the palace, we can CONFIRM that Prince Marcus of Ireland is not saving his heart for his soon to be wife, The King of Ireland’s Beloved Cousin the Countess Parkinson. He was seen last night hot and heavy with a mystery woman outside of his private residence.
We reached out to both Countess Parkinson’s secretary and to the Palace about this scandal and have not heard back. What this means for the upcoming royal wedding remains unclear.
Prince Harry of England is going to be having a parade of lovely ladies coming his way over the next few weeks. We hear these are auditions for the role of Future Mrs. Potter, and the front runners are Princess Gabrielle of France and her cousin Princess Anais of Quebec. We say go for the ginger, Prince Harry! We want some gorgeous redheaded princes and princesses! Of course, there is always the wild card Lady Millicent who would also provide some ginger babies, if you can get past her rather large figure. (And no, we won’t talk about her new nickname Lady Heifer.)
Has anyone seen King James of England? We hear he sent his wife to the funeral in Scotland so he could have time alone with his close friend Lord Black.
Who was warming King Ernie of Scotland’s bed this week? We hear it would be a ROYAL scandal if it came out. Hope she isn’t pregnant, as we hear having his child is simply to die for.
And finally, we hear that Seamus Finnegan was seen near Christmas meeting with a potion maker who is known for his talent in poisons. It would make sense, after all Ireland’s biggest ally is Scotland.
That’s all for this week, lovelies!
Rita
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