AU STUFFS OMG
Who: Mari and Mikey and OPEN Where: Ghetto-est supermarket ever? When: Wednesday night What: Buying stuffs Rating: Medium
"Oh mah GAWD, Mikey. Calm the fuck down. Don't make me take off my chancleta!"
Ah, the dreaded chancleta. It's traditionally a small child's worst nightmare. This special sandal isn't like other sandals out there. For some reason, once in the hands of a Cuban mother, this seemingly harmless piece of footwear becomes the ultimate weapon against children. When it strikes, it stings at first. And then, after a while, it leaves a dull burning sensation, usually on your bottom. Mari, being a typical Cuban mom, was an expert at wielding the mighty chancleta of doom. No one ever taught her how to us it. She was just born with the knowledge so that one day she too could beat the living shit out of her offspring in public.
Humiliation of the worst kind. It was the Cuban way.
"Now sit in that cart and play witchor shoelaces until mommy can finish buying you the food that's gonna keep yo ass alive!"
Mari pushed the cart forward into the aisles with absolutely no regard for how fast it was going or how tightly she took the corners. Mikey could handle it. It would make him strong, and he needed to be strong in order to live in this world. Besides, she wasn't about to miss Dancing with the Stars tonight! She grabbed a pack of black beans and tossed it into the cart. She then raced down into the next aisle for Mikey's cereal. Her phone began to vibrate in her pocket and then her ringtone went off loudly. It was AJ, but Mari sighed, put it on silent and kept on walking. She really didn't have time for husbands right now. She was on a mission to find Cuban coffee baby. And no one was going to stop her.