How do I say this. If I am going to start trying to avoid certain things I need to know that I can count on specific things. I can't go into this with something I think is going to be fail safe and get stuck in the middle of a mess. If you are ok learning about how to work your gift for the benefit of those you care about then go all in. If you are not willing to try and possibly fail and try again, then I will try and help you minimize your pain and grief. I will try and teach you to gain some control. But I think there is a strong heart in there, and one that wants to make things better. Let me know.