Rory's breathing was choppy when he finished his long, rambling explanation and his eyes, although he would never admit it, were glistening with unshed tears. When Eisen put his hands on Rory's shoulders, Rory couldn't help but lean into the contact, rolling forward in his chair until their knees were almost touching. He held Eisen's gaze for a few seconds, then slowly lowered his head onto Eisen's shoulder. It was a big gesture for Rory, whose tolerance for other people's physical comfort was extraordinarily low. To not only accept it when it was offered but nonverbally request it himself was quite rare. No matter what he said now, the way he was feeling had already been made infinitely clear.
"Yes, well. You know what they say about good intentions and how they pave the road to hell." Rory chuckled darkly. The expression had already been floating around in his mind before his unpleasant conversation with Penny, but now it was the first response to spring to his mind. "You don't have to talk to Penny. I doubt she'll listen anyway. I must've told her six times that I didn't mean to do it, but clearly that doesn't matter. And you know... in a way she's right, Eisen. The point is that it happened. The point is that I made it happen." His voice shook. "And what kind of a horrible person does that make me, Eisen? I messed everything up. I did this. Maybe you shouldn't be on my side."
Rory closed his eyes. He'd said it, and he meant it, although the idea of Eisen ever not being there for him was... crushing. Even so, the guilt of the things that Rory wasn't telling him was at least as painful. For as much of the truth as he'd given, the fact remained that there was one person he most definitely had intentionally manipulated, and that was Eisen himself. Or... more specifically Lexie, but the meaning was the same. The outcome was the same. It was awful. No, that wasn't right. He was awful.