I didn't go into your history, I watch the show. I watched it before you spoke to me, I didn't go and try to find out about you before you spoke to me. Get over yourself.
And second of all, a mistake is forgetting to sign something in the right place. Keeping information that could get someone out of jail a secret, that's not a mistake. That is a deliberate action. I could care less if you were selling drugs, or whatever, but that was a cruel thing to do. And I'm sure that no one else would call it a "mistake" either.
Read the books, I don't care. I've never even done anything remotely like that. Being someone's sub, (which I ended up not doing, by the way) is not wrong if both parties agree to it. You did a completely heinous thing to someone you were supposed to love and she paid dearly for it.