I still don't completely understand it either, but I'm learning. So we can learn together.
A lot of it falls in the pronouns that I am comfortable using. And it won't be a deal-breaker if you mess it up. Instead of "he" or "she", I go by "they". At the same time, it's OK if you slip up and use "she". And when referring to me to someone, you can call me your partner. That is... if you'll officially be my girlfriend.