I never said I wouldn't accept forgiveness. Merely that I know I've spent too long killing and conquering for it to be a realistic expectation.
I thought that by taking lives, destroying half the life in the universe, that I would impress Death. That I would make her sit up and take notice of me. And she did... but not in the way I hoped. The more lives I took, the more she distanced herself from me.
It was only at the end of existence itself that I finally realized the truth. Death takes who she wants, when she wants. Trying to do her job for her is an affront. A mockery. The best thing I could do is preserve life when possible. Let lives end because it is their time, not because I deemed it their time.