A Really Happy Memory
Title: A Really Happy Memory
Author: SirenPrincess or Ras1 on fanfiction.net
Pairing: Sev/Lily
Rating: This story is rated T for Teen (PG-13), but it follows two stories rated M for Mature (16+). Therefore, I ask that no one under 16 years old read this.
Warnings: references to previous child abuse/domestic abuse, teens making out but no sex, mild language, ***DH SPOILERS***
Summary: You need a really happy memory to conjure a full Patronus. Even a moderately happy memory will not do. This story is Severus’ happiest memory. Set during the summer between their fourth and fifth year at Hogwarts, Lily and Severus get some happy alone time.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Severus Snape, Lily Evans, and all of that world belong to JKR and the WB. No copyright infringement is intended. This story is designed to increase fan appreciation of JKRs work. No money is earned from the writing of this story.
Authors Notes: This story is a sequel to Surviving the Summer and Dark Magic. This story can stand alone. You do not have to read those to understand this one. However, it might explain a few minor details and add more to the characters. Besides, you might enjoy those.

This story ended up much fluffier than my usual work. There's still some hurt/comfort in it. It wouldn't be one of my stories if it didn't have hurt/comfort. However, it's probably the fluffiest story I've ever written. Severus actually gets a little bit of happiness in this one. I suppose I needed to give him that after writing Dark Magic, Christmas Presents, and Crumbling Down. Hope you enjoy.

A special thanks to trobairiz for her beta work.



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The world seemed a completely different place during the summer. There was the obvious: he was living among Muggles instead of wizards. But it was more than that. Some of the things that existed in his summer world were awful and painful, like his parents’ constant fighting or his father’s physical and verbal abuse. However, other things were wonderful. For three full months Severus Snape got Lily Evans’ undivided attention. Lily’s friendship with her sister had become strained since attending Hogwarts and Lily had no other Muggle friends, so she chose to spend almost all of her time with Severus. There was no one there during the summer to get in the way.

At some point they had learned that they could both get away with doing magic without fear of consequences as long as they did it at or near his house in Spinner’s End. At first Severus had been reluctant to let Lily into his home, if you could even call it that. It was horribly embarrassing to let her see how poorly he lived. But Lily wasn’t like that. She didn’t seem to mind at all. At least, she never once teased him over it. Eventually Severus accepted that Lily was quite happy to spend time with him there, especially since they could do magic. His mother took no notice of what they did. He just had to be sure Lily left before his father got home from work.

On this particular day, though, they were not performing any magic. What they were doing was actually quite boring. The teachers had assigned a rather large chunk of homework for them to do over the summer, so Lily and Severus both sat on his bed, diligently working on their Transfiguration essays. Severus frowned in concentration as he copied a portion of the text into his essay. To him, Transfiguration was a horribly boring subject. In Potions you could improvise; you could experiment; you could logically determine the outcome of adding various ingredients. Transfiguration was simple memorization and practice, and lots of copying word for word from his textbook. Needing a break, he dared to cast a glance at Lily. He was surprised to find that she was not working on her essay and was, in fact, staring directly at him. Her eyes immediately darted back down to her parchment the moment she realized she was caught. She smiled innocently, but the faintest blush on her cheeks gave her away. She had been staring at him. “What are you looking at?” he asked curiously.

“You,” she said unabashed.

“What about me?” he demanded, but he couldn’t help but smile when he saw the bold look in her eyes.

“You get the funniest crinkle in your forehead when you’re concentrating, right here,” she giggled as he lightly smoothed his forehead with her index finger. “Better be careful or you’re going to have wrinkles when you get old.”

“You’re worried about me getting wrinkles?” he asked with a laugh. She couldn’t be serious. Everyone knew his face was hideous enough with his long, pointy nose and sallow skin. Surely a few wrinkles wouldn’t make much of an impact. All of this was besides the fact that it was a very odd thing to be thinking about.

She didn’t answer him, but went back to work on her assignment. After a few moments of observing her, Severus gave up and began working on his own essay again. He couldn’t help glancing up at her occasionally as he continued to write. She was pretending to read her Transfiguration book, but he could tell that she was staring at him again. Particularly, she was staring right at his nose. Severus was already extremely self-conscious about it, and it didn’t help that all of the Hogwarts students teased him for it. Now Lily was staring at it. Was she inwardly laughing at him, too? Was it possible that she only tolerated his presence during the summers because she was lonely and that she was just memorizing every detail of his oddly shaped nose to laugh with her friends about it when she returned to school? He tried not to let himself think about it as he started writing another paragraph.

He chanced another glimpse at her and was shocked to find her inches from his face. There was a gleam in her green eyes as he stared into them in confusion. A moment later, she tilted her head at the exact right angle and kissed Severus quickly on the lips. He was too stunned to react. He just sat there as she backed away.

“I just wanted to see what that would feel like,” she said with a smile.

Severus’s heart was pounding. He’d fantasized about kissing Lily practically every day since the moment he had met her. He wanted nothing more than to reach for her and pull her into a passionate full-tongue make-out session, but he’d never even dreamed that she would suddenly out-of-the-blue kiss him. What did it mean that she had? Was she actually romantically interested in him? Did he dare even hope for that to be the case? Or, was she simply curious about kissing boys and using her platonic friend for practice? He tried to force his voice to stay as casual as hers when he simply raised an eyebrow and asked, “and?”

“Your lips are softer than I would have thought.” She was smiling again, and the blush was back.

He recognized this as an opportunity that he might not ever have again. He had to take a chance. “Would you like to find out what . . . more would feel like?”

“Yes,” she whispered as she leant across their parchments and books. She closed her eyes this time and puckered her lips as she neared him.

Severus felt as if he’d longed for this moment all of his life. He gently pressed his lips into hers. They were soft and warm as he’d always imagined, but it was better than he’d ever dreamed, too. He wasn’t sure how much of ‘more’ she was interested in. He hesitated, knowing that he wouldn’t be content if they ended it with this, but also knowing that he couldn’t live with himself if he pushed her further than she wanted to go. He didn’t pull away, but instead decided to barely part his lips. If she was interested in more, she would follow, if not . . . well, then, at least he would know. Lily opened her mouth and ran her lip along the inside of his. Unable to resist, Severus daringly flicked his tongue inside her. She accepted him welcomingly before teasing back with her own. She titled her head the other direction, and they repeated another warm, wet kiss. Slowly, Severus pulled back and then wrapped his arms around her. With his mouth inches from her ear, he breathed, “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she exhaled slowly. After a moment’s pause, she started nibbling on his ear. Then, she trailed her kisses along his jaw before returning to his mouth. They were fully snogging within minutes. It was amazing. Somehow he could feel her love for him transmitting through her touch. He could not harbor any further doubts about her feelings for him.

Severus was uncertain of what to do with his hands. Of course, he knew what he wanted to do with them but he was still very worried about scaring her off. Her hands reached around his waist, so he decided to let his loosely fall around her hips. They were both panting slightly now. Passion drove him to kiss her deeper as her hands reached up the back of his shirt.

Instantly, Severus froze. Lily’s fingers were tracing one of his scars. His entire back was a lattice-work of scars from one punishment or another. His father only forbade his mother to heal them for particularly severe punishments, but there were plenty that had left their mark. Severus had managed to avoid the public showers at school and changing around others most of the time so no one had ever really seen them. Humiliation overwhelmed him as Lily’s delicate hand found another. He was completely rigid under her touch. Finally he snapped himself back together and shoved her off of him. Without saying a word, he stood and walked over to his window. He tried to focus on the horizon and let the numbness enter him. He’d never, ever thought that he would have to use his shutting down technique when he was with Lily, but the idea of her not only knowing but touching the reminders of his horrible secret . . . he couldn’t take it.

“Sev,” her voice interrupted his process. “Sev, it’s all right. It didn’t bother me, okay?”

“Don’t patronize me, Lily,” he snapped. “I know how disgusting it is!” He regretted yelling at her the minute he saw the hurt expression on her face. He couldn’t stand seeing sorrow in her beautiful green eyes, especially knowing that he put it there. “I’m sorry,” he whispered as he shut his own eyes to avoid looking into hers.

She stood and hugged him. “Let’s just forget about it, all right?”

His throat clenched, threatening to close off. Forget about it . . . about kissing . . . about . . . had he messed things up that badly?

“Let’s go back to where we were,” she whispered. She brushed her hand gently along his cheek before reaching to slowly unbutton the top of her blouse. “Please, Sev, it’s our first time. I don’t want you to have a bad experience.”

If there was one thing that could get him back in the mood for snogging, it was a peek at the top of Lily’s breasts. “Are you sure, Lily?” he asked, still holding himself back. He didn’t want her doing something she would regret. He would understand if she was too sickened to continue.

“I think I’ve made it pretty clear what I want,” she whispered while pulling lightly on his hand and dragging him back to the bed.

Severus did not need her to ask again. Only Lily could know his secrets, really and truly know his secrets, and care about him anyway. He kissed her, over and over again. He enjoyed the sweetness of the taste that was uniquely Lily’s. Gradually he lightly caressed her skin, but he was careful to do it gently and romantically. He wanted his touch to be something that she enjoyed. As much as he longed to fully pleasure himself with her, she meant more to him than that. It seemed as if their kisses could go on forever, but finally they both had to stop for air. More than anything Severus loved the feeling of simply holding Lily as she rested against his chest. He lightly kissed her forehead as he continued to stroke his fingers lovingly along her arm and through her hair. It was the most wonderful Severus had ever felt in his life.

They were content just to lie like that for a while. Severus wanted to remember every single detail of this: the feeling of her cool skin against his, the slight smile on her face, the floral fragrance of her hair, the way she tasted like strawberries, the glisten to her skin in the evening sun. Evening sun . . .

“Shit!” he bolted upright. He had lost track of time. “We have to get you out of here!”

She must have sensed the panic in his voice because she did not argue as he pulled her up. She quickly took a moment to button her blouse. Then she let him escort her out the back door.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home,” he offered once they were safely away from his own house. Still nervous, Severus put his arm around her. He was relieved when she leaned into him and didn’t shrug off his arm.

Things were definitely different in the summer. As they headed down the street to her home, there was no one to complain about a Slytherin holding a Gryffindor in his arms. There was no one to whisper nasty comments about Mudbloods. And for at least that one night, they were both truly happy.

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