Briseis (spoil_of_war) wrote in forgotten_gods, @ 2010-03-08 15:46:00 |
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Entry tags: | briseis |
Promise me maybes and say things you don't mean
WHO: Briseis & David [NPC]
WHERE: Sunday night, Briseis' apartment
WHAT: Confession time
For days ago Briseis had finally returned to the apartment she shared with David, so unbelievably happy to see and be with him once again. Kissing David she could forget about the horrible thing that she had allowed herself to do and just be there with him instead. But Briseis couldn't play the role of cheating mistress and keep her night with Achilles from David. Not if she wanted to retain any sense of self-worth at all, something which was already dangling dangerously low.
Which was why when David came home from work late on Sunday evening he found his girlfriend curled up in the windowseat in their dark apartment, her eyes red from crying - although she'd stopped that now.
"Bri?" he whispered, dropping his bag next to him and walking over towards her, not switching on a light. She was easy enough to see in the glow from the streets that came spilling in. "What's wrong?"
Briseis looked at her boyfriend and then, scared it might be the last time, she hugged him, burying her face in his neck and breathing him in. "I have to tell you something," she finally managed to say, not drawing away from the hug yet. David was holding her close and Briseis was scared that she was about to lose all the courage she'd gathered to do this. Finally she broke the contact, slowly and horribly, and sat with her back against the cold wood behind her.
David looked so concerned and Briseis closed her eyes against it. "I love you," she whispered without opening them. And that much was true. Achilles had appeared and stirred up all these old emotions. Her beautiful blond warrior who had made of her something so strong, who had showed her what it was to be loved and respected and adored and who, in return, she had loved just as deeply. His reappearance had not lessened the love she felt for her mortal David, but simply confused and complicated it. Briseis had always firmly believed that someone could only love one person at a time, and now she was being proven wrong and it felt awful.
"Briseis," David whispered just as quietly, reaching for her hands, "tell me what's happened?"
Briseis wet her lips, scared of this almost more than anything else. She'd been a slave in the hands of violent warlords, a girl to be passed along, a woman owned by everyone except herself, but Briseis had never had anything to truly lose before. "I've betrayed you."
Her words were almost silent, but it seemed that David heard them anyway. His hands slipped from hers, just enough for it to be noticed by her, and he now looked cautious. "What do you mean?" he asked, his expression wary but almost unreadable to her.
Briseis had had this conversation with him a thousand ways in her head and yet now when it came down to it all the ways she'd had to explain it were completely gone. All she had left was the brutal truth and she was silent for a long time, the words spinning around and around in her head before she finally said them out loud.
"I slept with Adrianus." She could feel those tears springing to her eyes again, her voice thickening even before she finished speaking. "I am so, so sorry."
But David was already drawing away from her and standing up again. The hurt was easy to read now. "When?"
Oh, Briseis didn't want to give the honest answer to that. But she had to. "Valentine's Day," she said, looking at her hands instead of at him.
The room was completely silent and Briseis almost felt that if she looked up she would be alone. She couldn't deal with that. She'd already spent so much time by herself in the last few weeks and there was nothing she hated more. David spoke again and Briseis started breathing once more. "You told me there was nothing going on between you two. You promised me."
Briseis looked up at him helplessly, guiltily. "There's wasn't. When you asked, when I said that-" She shook her head quickly. "It was only the once and- David, I have no way to explain to you what is it between me and him, because it doesn't make sense but... I love you, so much, but-" She bite down hard on her lip. "I still have feelings for him as well."
David had stepped back so he was leaning against the wall, and Briseis watched the emotions moving across his face. Finally he stood, shaking his head and holding out a hand to keep her silent. "No," he just said, his voice shaking. "I can't do this with you right mow."
"David-"
"Bri, no." He spoke so clearly and there was real anger behind it. She fell silent immediately at seeing it. She'd so rarely ever seen him actually angry, and never directed at her. "Just... no." He turned then and walked away from her. Briseis watched the floor where he had stood and when the front door slammed shut she flinched and wrapped her arms around herself.