Her own eyes lit when he moved close to her, and she couldn't hide her response to him -- the shallowness of her breaths or the increased beating of her heart.
It was hard to believe what he was saying - they'd never been much for heart-to-hearts. Alyssa had learned a long time ago to hide who she truly was in order to get what she wanted. And although Karl was usually fairly straightforward, she knew that he kept his own secretes. Yet here he was -- stating his high opinion of her, telling her that he wanted more, he wanted both.
She could give him one or the other -- sex, a quick affair to get him out of her system and never see him again -- or bury down the feelings that he seemed determined to awake with his proximity, with the darkness in his green eyes. Alyssa did not think it would be possible to survive both, even if they could manage to pull it off without the whole department finding out.
She quickly wet her lips. "If the way you care for me is what brought you in on that opp... then it's a liability." Alyssa shook her head. She was not going to be responsible for his death. "We can't afford liabilities in our line of work. I want to stay with you, Karl, you're being more than fair to me -- but I'm not the kinda girl who tries to sneak around the regs." Not anymore.
He was going to kiss her. She knew it as surely as if she'd seen it happen before. She could not let that happen. She would not be able to pretend like his kiss couldn't affect her. So Alyssa straightened up, "But thank you for telling me," she said, her heart beating like a hummingbird's within her and she felt -- strange. Like she was hurting herself when she spoke. "It's always good to know where you stand."
And then she stood away from the wall and made as if to brush passed him.