InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "you is so cute"

Glimmer (starof1) wrote in expresslogs,
@ 2012-09-08 19:05:00

Current music:	P!nk-Blow Me (One Last Kiss)
Entry tags:	!plot, cato, {glimmer

Who: Glimmer and Cato
What: Glimmer gets bitten by the lying song bug. Cue feelings which from these two...should be interesting.
When: Saturday night
Where: Gym car
Ratings/warnings: It's Cato and Glimmer. Definitely language, references/descriptions of violence.
Status: Closed/ongoing

So far, Glimmer hadn't given too much thought to the train's latest shit fest. Sure, it had been kind of funny when people put songs on the net and their friends or whatever freaked out, but other than that she was just really fucking glad it hadn't hit her this time. She knew it'd fucked with Cato, again, but she'd been smart enough not to say anything about it. After the last time when he'd sang that fucking song outside their room...

Well, she really didn't want to think about that. Luckily he wasn't the kind to go blabbing on about how that shit made him feel, either. That was one reason she preferred training with him, even if Buffy and other people had offered--because some of them wanted to talk. And that just made Glimmer feel...really fucking uncomfortable. But sparring with Cato didn't. Hell, nothing with Cato was really uncomfortable. He was really the one person on this damn train she could stand being around for too long without getting pissed.

Right now, for instance, she was feeling really fucking good. That awesome, sore-but-relaxed kind of worn out she always got after training with him. She was rubbing the sweat off her face, just barely smirking, when she realised she was tapping her foot a bit. Rhythmically.

Shitshitmotherfuckingtrain

She snarled in the back of her throat as she realised it hadn't passed her up this time, either--right before she turned back to Cato and the words came out before she could even try and stop them.

White knuckles and sweaty palms from hanging on too tight
Clenched shut jaw, I've got another headache again tonight
Eyes on fire, eyes on fire, and they burn from all the tears
I've been crying, I've been crying, I've been dying over you
Tie a knot in the rope, tryin' to hold, tryin' to hold,
But there's nothing to grasp so I let go

I think I've finally had enough, I think I maybe think too much
I think this might be it for us, blow me one last kiss
You think I'm just too serious, I think you're full of shit
My head is spinning so, blow me one last kiss

Just when it can't get worse, I've had a shit day
You've had a shit day, we've had a shit day
I think that life's too short for this, I want back my ignorance and bliss
I think I've had enough of this, blow me one last kiss.

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prideof2
2012-09-09 01:19 am UTC (link)

After the last few days he'd had, Cato had been thrilled to have a couple hours training time with Glimmer. She didn't argue with him, she didn't piss him off, she didn't do anything at all that bothered him. She was just...his friend. Probably more, but she didn't make him say anything about that either. Things just happened when they were happened, and it was fucking great, and it was the one part of his life that he actually was sure about. Whatever he and Glimmer had, it was good. And it made him...fuck, it made him happy.

When they finished, he took a gulp from the water bottle he had next to him, just before she started singing.

The water bottle was the first victim - he dropped it as the meaning of her words hit him, and it fell to the floor of the car with a dull thud.

"You..."

For a moment he just stared at her, stunned. Then he began to shake. Then, his world exploded. It was like when the food had been destroyed in the Arena, only a thousand times worse. The fear and hate and anger and hurt all hit him at once, when he was vulnerable. He'd trusted her, let his walls down, and she'd snuck in and destroyed him when he wasn't looking.

His sword still in his hand, he ran from the room, slamming the hilt into every door he could find, not even seeming to notice how badly he was cutting his hand. When he reached the end of the corridor, he slammed the sword into the main door, again and again and again, screaming with...something gutteral and animalistic.

He hit it again, and this time something broke, forcing him back, his sword still in his hand. There was a brief moment of surprise, but he didn't have time or the balance to stop his fall as he fell on his side, the sword slicing open his shirt and his skin as he did.

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starof1
2012-09-09 01:33 am UTC (link)

Shit.

That was the only really clear thing that went through Glimmer's mind the second those words were out. And then Cato was shaking, and for just a second she was worried he'd actually hurt her, and what was even more messed up than that was the fact that she felt kind of hurt and sick already.

Because sure, he could be a dumbass sometimes. But she'd never...she'd never actually say anything like that to him when she was in control of herself. She'd never insult him like that. And realising that, and that she had, and he looked like he believed it....

For a second Glimmer just stood there, dumb, fingertips numb and tingling with something she couldn't quite describe. Then the crashing noises came through and she ran a hand over her face, grabbing her short blade before she ran out.

"Cato! Shit. It was just the fucking train, I didn't--" she stopped, silent and still, when she saw where he'd collapsed on the floor.

"Oh, fuck," she snarled, ignoring the fact her throat was choked and that her vision was a little blurry.

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prideof2
2012-09-09 01:37 am UTC (link)

The cut was deep.

Cato knew that, even if he couldn't really feel it. He was a fucking idiot, he knew that too. He flung the sword away from him, barely hearing it as the metal clattered on the floor. His shirt...fuck...was ruined. Why that mattered, he wasn't sure. He wasn't thinking the best right now, maybe. Who knew. Everything felt...weird right now anyway.

He put his hand on his side, where the cut had been, and it was almost immediately covered in his own blood. That couldn't be good. That much blood...almost certainly couldn't be good.

He blinked as his vision went wobbly, and tried to get to his feet, only to collapse again.

So...this was what it felt like?

He'd imagined more...well...everything.

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starof1
2012-09-09 01:53 am UTC (link)

Glimmer felt her breath rush out, leaving her feeling a little dizzy as well, when she saw just how much blood there was. Fuckfuckfuck.

Before she even realised what she was doing, she was on her knees right next to where Cato had fallen.

"Fucking hell Cato," she said, trying to put a bite into her voice to keep it from shaking. "Don't move. I'll--shit," she raked a hand through her hair, trying to think. It was hard to, though, when he was bleeding so much, hard to have anything but that in her mind. Infimary's close--not sure I can get him up like this--could post--who'd actually come for him--tear off a piece of my shirt--fuck would it do enough to matter--

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prideof2
2012-09-09 01:57 am UTC (link)

Cato pushed her hand away as violently as he could - which was far less violently than normal, for him.

"Go away," he grumbled, his words slowing a little. "Leave me alone. You don't get to...you don't get to...fuck you, Glimmer, you don't get to save me after...after that. You don't get to be the hero. That was always your way, wasn't it? That was your plan all along, get under my skin and then hit when I trusted you, when my guard was down. Well fuck you, you won, are you happy now?"

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starof1
2012-09-09 02:08 am UTC (link)

While she could have very easily fought back with him like this, Glimmer let him push her away. Because, fuck, she did feel bad about the song and she had even as she'd been singing.

Didn't mean Cato believing it and fucking himself up over it didn't piss her off. "What the fuck Cato," she growled. "It was the goddamn train. If you actually think I'd be that fucking dumb--" she breathed out through her teeth.

"You're the one fucking person on this train I give a damn about. What the hell would I 'win' by pissing you off like this? Huh?" she growled when she realised her nose had gotten a little stuffy, and she decided to set herself to tearing off some of her shirt to maybe do something to patch up the dumbass. Not like anyone else would do it--she was the only one who gave a shit about him, and now he thought she didn't.

Fucking train.

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prideof2
2012-09-09 02:18 am UTC (link)

"What would you win?" he asked, trying to glare at her, but his eyes kept focusing and unfocusing - what the hell - "Well...fucking everything. You'd be the Victor, win it all, go home, make everyone proud and it'd be...fucking awesome, right? That's what they always said, kill everyone and then everything'll be...fucking great. Yeah."

He pulled his hand away from the wound, pressing it back quickly as the blood seemed to come faster. Shit, this was bad. But it didn't really hurt, so that was, well...weird.

"But I don't even fucking want that anymore. You know what I want? Not that it fucking matters now. Nothing fucking matters now. I just wanted to wake up in the morning and see you. That's it. Pathetic, isn't it? Fucking pathetic. But that was it. And now that's gone too."

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starof1
2012-09-09 02:24 am UTC (link)

"Yeah," Glimmer tried to laugh as she shook her head, but it didn't come out right. Came out more like a sound someone would make if they were trying not to cry. "Sure. Fuck Cato, you know what happens to me back home. And even if we could change things...."

She bit back another stupid sound when she saw the blood on his hand. "Fucking..." she growled, ripping off the fabric twisting her hands and shoving his arm away to get close enough to actually try and stop the bleeding.

"It's not," she snapped, "it's not because you're not fucking dying, and I'm not going to fucking leave or whatever you think I want to do, because--"

Glimmer breathed out heavily through her nose, glad for the distraction of trying to do something and then grabbing for her phone because fuck she couldn't do enough on her own. But even that wasn't enough to keep away the nagging feeling that she should say something. Keeping her eyes carefully on the device and not him, she spoke a little quieter.

"Because that's what I want too."

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prideof2
2012-09-09 02:29 am UTC (link)

Something flashed through Cato's eyes - and heart - at that. He wasn't sure what it was. Hope, maybe? Fear? One of those weak emotions, anyway. Ones that they weren't supposed to have.

"But you...you said...you sang..."

And his mind flashed back vividly to the song he'd shared with Gale, and with that girl. And how they'd said the opposite of what he'd really felt and...shit, why was he such a fucking moron?

"Son of a bitch," he growled, trying to force himself to his feet again, but slipping in the pool of his own blood and coming down hard, with a cry of anger. He felt most of his energy slip away at that, and he lay his head back on the metal.

It just figured he'd die like this. Shit. On a train, in a pile of his own blood, because he'd been a fucking dipshit.

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starof1
2012-09-09 02:34 am UTC (link)

Glimmer saw the realisation hit him, and under any other circumstance she'd have rolled her eyes.

"Wondered how long it'd take you to get it, dumbass," she said, more to herself, as she kept her eyes fixed on her device so she wouldn't look at him and do something like cry. Someone had better get their ass down here, and fast, or she'd...

She didn't know, but it wouldn't be good.

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	prideof2 2012-09-09 02:42 am UTC (link)
	Cato closed his eyes for a moment, trying to fight off the sleepiness. He wasn't a doctor, but he knew falling asleep would be...a really bad thing. Really fucking bad. He reached over and grabbed her hand, squeezing it as hard as he could, which was a frightening indication of just how weak he was. "I don't...I don't wanna go back, Glimmer." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	starof1 2012-09-09 02:58 am UTC (link)
	A knot lodged itself in her throat when he took her hand, and she swallowed it own, telling it and the stupid tears to stay right where they were. "Yeah, me neither," she said, trying to keep her voice steady. "And we don't have to, right? We can find some place that's not too messed up, stay there. Do...something. Whatever we want." (Reply to this) (Parent)