The Bad Sex Meme!
Tired of perfect, shiny, mind-blowing RP sex? This is the meme for you!
BAD SEX - THE MEME
Rules:
1. Comment with your character. Name and fandom should be in the subject, and any special requests (prompts/kinks you'd like to avoid, same/different gender only, etc) in the comment. 2. Choose an unfortunate parter and head to RNG to roll a number between 1 and 12. If you're really courageous (or in for a good laugh), double up prompts! 3. If you can't get a roll you want, just choosing a number (even 12) isn't cheating. It's all in fun after all. Also, since some of these involve kinks or potential pain, just tell your partner if that particular prompt isn't for you. 4. And since it's all in fun, please be respectful of others and avoid nastiness.
Prompts:
1. First Time - This one is obvious. It'll be awkward, it'll probably be painful, and you'll both spend the whole time wondering if you're doing it right. 2. Too Drunk to Fuck - You're both all partied out, but you're determined to end the night with a bang. If you can stay conscious and avoid throwing up long enough, that is. 3. No Attraction - You're the last two who haven't paired off at the party, and once again, you're determined to end the night with a bang. But - can we do it with the lights off? 4. No Room to Move - This one may sound sexy, but when you keep banging your knees and elbows and head on all those cleaning supplies in the broom closet, you'll get tired of it fast. 5. Finished Too Soon - Someone's crossing the finish line before their partner is even out of the gate, and now that they're done, they just want to sleep. 6. Lullabye and Goodnight - Even worse, someone keeps falling asleep during the act! Are you good enough to keep them awake until you're finished? 7. Bad Dirty Talk - Someone learned all of their lines from porn, didn't they? Try to keep from laughing just long enough to get off. 8. Multitasking - Is their favourite show on TV? Does their phone keep ringing? Something is more important than sex right now, and you don't know if you'll be able to change that. 9. Wrong Name Emergency - This'll stop things dead in an established relationship. Who is this mysterious person, and why are you calling out their name during sex?! Or even worse, is the name one you recognise? 10. Kink Misfire - What's wrong with trying something new? Give him a spank, or bite her collarbone. A lot is wrong with it, if it turns out to be their surefire instant turn-off. 11. Get the First Aid Kit - Maybe you shouldn't have tried that new position after all. Got a tensor bandage for that sprained ankle? 12. Player's Choice! - Did we forget a way that sex could go bad? Make up your own!