WHO: Kyo & Badr WHEN: Another Time WHERE: The Library SUMMARY: Badr tries to learn about Guren this time. He is still baffled by these strange social mores. (He continues to be Simurgh's #1 stan.) CW: N/A
It was the only empty table left in the library, and it was only empty because Cinna had very recently vacated the seat to locate a pot of tea. So Badr was sitting alone, idly taking notes from a book that looked to be thicker than those thin arms might easily manage. That was why they had tables. It was a treatise on tactics used in an obscure altercation dating pre-Shadow Catastrophe, and Badr had read a little about it before...but he recalled that he hadnât found the material very interesting then either.
He wanted, instead, to read about the art and architecture of Serenitas, because he was hoping to rope someone into a cultural tour of the city, but that wasnât what the upcoming exam was on, so he lazily turned a page and peered up at the vaulted window beside him, sighing. If all his time in Serenitas was going to be spent studying, then how was it any different from Simurgh? And why, then, had he been sent here. He shook his head, resting his chin in his palm.
The book Kyo had wanted to read about the history of the crystals could not leave the library. Ideally, he wanted to take the book back to his room but the librarian didnât like that idea. It forced him to be social-- what Kyo really hated more than anything.
He surveyed the tables that all had occupants in each. He sighed as he saw a group of girls giggle from one, probably towards him. Hard pass. There were a pair of fellow Gurens at one table -- distant cousins if Kyo recalled. Also Hard Pass. In the corner he saw a fellow chosen. The singer.
Whatever, he thought as he approached with his book, âHello,â he began stiffly, âDo you mind if I sit here?â
Short. Badrâs first thought as he glanced up at Kyo. The way he held the book, the wooden way he spoke⌠He seemed very young and uncomfortable and so Badr, neither smiling or frowning, dipped his head to indicate that Kyo ought to make himself comfortable. âYou may.â
He had not talked to the Prince of Guren before. It had taken him a moment to realize that this short youth was heir to the throne. Of course heâd been a little curious. The Chosen of the Crystals were all, in his mind, oddities. They believed that rocks were indicating something to them, which perhaps they were, but he wondered at how trustworthy the interpretations of those messages could be. Heâd sent a message to his father, but his father had assured him that Crystalism was, in fact, legitimate, so he was trying his best to accept that as truth. But it still seemed suspect.
His eyes flicked to the book, taking in the title, and he tilted his head in interest. Sunlight fell through the window beside him, catching in his right eye, the golden-brown turning molten as his gaze moved away from Kyoâs reading material to the book in front of himâhidden again under the veil of heavy lashes.
But even though Kyo was chosen by something that could only barely indicate its desires, and Badr was chosen by a being that could actually speak properly to convey to him Her will...he thought they were technically peers. Long fingers teased the edge of a page, and he considered whether he should trouble Kyo for his name, to make a proper introduction, or if they both wouldnât prefer to just share the silence and focus on their reading. The previous thought floated back: If all his time in Serenitas was going to be spent studying, then how was it any different from Simurgh? He was supposed to be learning something he couldnât learn in Simurgh. He wasnât entirely sure what that could be, but he thought it probably involved meeting outsiders and learning their ways.
âWhat is your name?â he finally asked, not looking up, but favoring Kyo with a brief glance from under his lashes.
Kyo felt momentarily relieved that he hadnât run into another Titus. Badr seemed to be more run of the mill when it comes to ⌠uh⌠was the Chosen of Song a leader? Zuyaâs brother. Even though he had asked Zuya multiple times about Simurgh, the place just felt so alien to him. He could get Donnersburg and their toy obsession. He got the air pirates. Even Serenitas. But Simurgh with its weird religion and different climate, Kyo settled it was a place that managed to produce Zuya, so he guessed it was okay.
Given the green light, Kyo lowered himself down to the seat across from Badr and opened his book. At the request for his name, he blinked a few times. Didnât everyone know who he was?
But he remembered his manners and held his arm across his chest, âMy apologies. Iâm Hishiro no Kyoujiro. The Sun Prince.â He swallowed before going any further into his extensive title. âAnd you are⌠?â
Badr tilted his head. The Sun Prince. These strange countries and their hierarchies, their strange methods of bestowing importance upon themselves and others⌠It was very peculiar. He nodded vaguely at this show of princely masculinity. He could not really understand princes. Half of them appeared to hate the title, the other half seemed overly proud of being born into something, as though they could not just as easily have been born beggars. Their good fortune was only chance. A meaningless boon.
The Chosen of Song was a servant; he might guide and bless the people of Simurgh, but he was not their leader really. No one man or woman could claim such a title, and he would never call himself âThe Song Prince.â He had been warned by his mother (and sometimes his father and occasionally other elders among the priests and priestesses) to be wary of pride. He knew it was a failing in him, but it was not one easily uprooted, for he was proud of his country, and he was proud to have been chosen by Her. But he also was aware that She had only chosen him to spare himânot because he was strong like Zuya, who had been made to test her mettle in some mysterious trial. He could only guess that the Dragon must test for strength and mettle. The Holy Score chose out of compassion, searched for Chosen who could bring harmony and peace to Simurgh. The Scoreâs power was in dealing life, not death, after allâand in Simurgh, at least, it was always life that was honored; it was life that had value. Even the Chosen of Dragon lived to protect the Chosen of Song, their might serving to sustain life rather than take it...
But he wondered if he was then singular among the Chosen. He wondered if they thought he was weak. Many people in Simurgh had considered him so, even after he had grown hale and hearty, because he had only become so by Her blessing. And he was not a warrior or a prince or a knight. Heâd wanted to be. Even after being chosen by the Score, heâd still wished that he could be the Dragonâs Chosen. A powerful dragoon. A warrior of unmatched strength and agility. The heart of a dragon in a human form⌠He had begged his sisters to teach him some combat, because he had wanted to be like any other young boy. But there were many kinds of strength, and it would be foolish to scoff at the Scoreâs power. It would be very silly to think that what she had gifted him was not in some ways greater than the might to wield a sword or swing a shield⌠The very idea amused him.
âBadr al-Asrar Marwan,â he said at length. âServant to the Holy Score. Servant to Simurgh.â His brows lifted, a hint of laughter moving in and out of his expression, before his eyes turned still and calm again. âYou are...my sisterâs friend? She spoke of you a few times.â
Kyo nodded once. He knew who the Servant of the Holy Score was, but never met in person. As tradition dictated, he should be properly introduced for a reason even if you know of that individual.
At the mention of Zuya, a smile played at his lips but he refused to let it grow further. Smiles make princes look like the common folk after all. No one who is regal smiles. No one who is a warrior smiles.
âYes, when Zuya visited Guren, we trained together. Sheâs a great person. You are lucky to call her sister,â he is gracious, still distant, but sincere. But he really envied Badr for having a great sister. His just left him all alone to deal with his duty as the eldest son and the Chosen of Fire and his sister just could leave all her connections behind. Zuya wouldnât abandon Badr outside her regular duties.
âSo, what are you reading about if you do not mind me asking?â
âStrategy,â Badr sighed, one hand found his cheek, curls spilling over his brow; he lazily ran a finger down the fissure between pages, flicking the spine lightly, and sighed again. âSimurgh does not engage in war the way other countries seem to. We believe itâs best avoided, rather than...glorified.â But he knew it was worth learning all these strategies. Because sometimes, even Simurgh saw conflict.
He hoped it would not in his lifetime, but it was his and Zuyaâs job to protect the people, so it would be remiss to not apply himself to internalizing this knowledge too.
âI wish, if I had to read about war, that at least there were more texts available about those âwar companionsâ of old. Do you ever feel that Serenitas is...oddly sanitized? Or...censored?â he asked, frowning and glancing at the library out of the corner of his eye. Between his interactions with Gaius and Titus, he had developed an odd feeling about the norms of this society. At first, heâd just been uncomfortable with how the city was so regimented. Flowers belonged in gardens. Everything else was roads and buildings. But heâd started to see that this categorization stretched beyond what was visible to the eye.
Simurgh was a country of secrets, and yet, perhaps because he was a part of those secretsâbecause everyone from Simurgh was privy to themâit felt different. They kept their secrets from the dangers of the outside world (the lords that would order Omar torn to pieces). Serenitas seemed like it was hiding something from its people, though, and Badr couldnât say what, but the fact that certain thoughts were considered forbidden, that so many things were...controlledâŚ
âWhat is it like in Guren?â he asked, uneasy about delving into those thoughts too much in a public space like the universityâs library.
Kyoâs eyes flashed at the mention of strategy. He had gotten many lessons about strategy to the point he had to resist the urge to roll his eyes. But he nodded and offered, âIf you have any questions about that, I can do my best. In Guren, our leaders are trained in the ways of warfare.â
He wondered if Badr would tell Zuya about how he acted today and if Zuya would get on his case either. She knew him so well and knew he could have fun. But he didnât know Badr that much at all. Would he be a gossiper and tell people about it?
âWar companions?â He raised an eyebrow. âAre you talking about⌠prostitutes? Sex slaves?â He furrowed his brow. Was that like Pius and Gaius? Servants seemed so close to one another. Was war companions a double entendre?
Badr sat up straight, a look of horror and disgust immediately firmly entrenched in his pretty features. The expression was distinctly at odds with his overall appearance, but the very thought of it. âThatâs disgusting,â he said. âNo, I donât think thatâs what...is meant. It seems to be some sort of relationship of deep camaraderieâa closer bond thanâŚâ He snorted despite himself. âHusband and wife.â
He wasnât sure if Guren was like Serenitas in that way. Perhaps Simurgh was really that different from the other countries⌠He felt sorry for everyone from everywhere else if so. Sex slaves and compulsory heterosexuality. It gave him chills.
âTitus did not go into great depth, but I think it is a mutual relationship between men.â
Kyo had his thoughts on Serenitas and had to go through some self-sanitizing of his own, âI think someone from Simurgh should know a thing or two about secrets. But yes, there is definitely attempts to control the story they tell themselves. Maybe a bit more than most countries do.â
Badr smirked. If only Kyo knew⌠His very title suggested that he was a secret-keeper of the elusive country. But he didnât want to suggest that Kyo should pry into that by mentioning it, and mostly, he was just relieved that Kyo seemed to also find Serenitas strange in the same way.
âWhat is it like in Guren?â Kyo repeated. He stared down at the table as he tried to think of the best words, âWeâre proud warriors. Weâre devoted to balance and compromise so war is but a last resort. We have different clans and where those clans rule have their own little culture that stands out. What about Simurgh from your perspective?â
âHarmony,â Badr replied. âWe will protect ourselves, as the dragons do, but Simurgh does not seek the resources of other countries. We have everything we need.â Which, he supposed, did make it easier to avoid extending their reach into other countryâs territories. âBalance and cooperation is favored, thoughâŚâ The followers of the Sacred Dragon could be hot-headed. Those who skewed more Dragon than Score could be a handful. But in the end, the Chosen of Dragon was the protector of the Chosen of Song, and that might had a purpose beyond simply reminding the rest of the world to mind their manners.
âDo your clans come into conflict with each other?â he asked, thinking that if each was so different, perhaps tension would be a natural result.
Kyo nodded his head once. He noticed that about the Dragon from Zuya. He knew he could depend on her for protection if he needed it. That is why he felt he could tell her anything and present himself as vulnerable around her.
At the mention about the clans, he glanced lazily up at the ceiling. Obligation. He had an obligation. âYes, our history is filled with times of unbalance, of clans fighting each other. We try to intermarry to keep things stable, especially between the more powerful clans. Arranged marriages and the like.â
After his education, he knew that he would marry the Chosen of Nature. And the tradition would continue. They would have kids. And his life would probably continue as it had already been laid out.
Violence, it seemed, was interwoven into the fabric of countries like Serenitas and Guren. He wondered how it was in Donnersberg and RĂĄig BhĂĄistĂ. If Badr was a bigger man, he might consider asking Thora about it, but the very idea of expressing interest in the country her family had absconded to⌠No, he hated that idea. Hated it entirely. But Donnersberg was, as he understood it, had once (not so long ago) been in conflict with Guren, and though it was the Shadow Catastrophe that had supposedly ruined the land...they did seem...to have questionable ambition even now.
Yes, it was important that Simurgh stay hidden and away from the evils of these other countries. Once again, he was reminded that while he was here, he must be cautious about what his peers, especially politically prominent ones like Kyo or Titus or Gaius, might ask about his home.
âSo Guren is a country that functions on control, too,â he surmised after a moment. âIt seems that the balance there is precarious.â He wondered what the differences between Serenitas and Guren might be, because Serenitas did not seem to waver on precarity. It seemed that balance was steadily enforced. Rigidly enforced. Enforced.
And that terrible line of words was making him think of something else entirely. His thoughts had drifted into a place that was not suitable for company.
âSo, is your country also...husbands and wives or chaste devotion...and nothing else?â
Kyo blinked a few times, âWhat country does not exist on some level of control? If there is chaos, a country canât really exist. Although control is a sticky word. Can take on many different forms and it is kind of a spectrum, I suppose.â He crossed his arms tilting his head to the side. Did Badr think control did not exist in the Hidden Kingdom?
âBalance is only maintained if people complete their obligations. Like your obligation as a husband or wife is to produce the next generation. If you choose to dedicate your life to the faith, well, then that is what you do. What do you mean ânothing elseâ?â
Badr stared at Kyo with the same incredulity heâd already stared at Titus and Gaius with. He completely disagreed with...nearly everything Kyo had just said to him, but he found it especially strange that Guren also did not consider that familiesâand partnershipsâdid not have to exist in only one shape.
With all these obligations and methods to control their people...how did these countries even maintain an illusion of peace and prosperity? He looked away before he could make too cynical an expression.
âI mean, do your people not just love who they love? Are there not wives and wives, or husbands and husbands? Is it always husbands and wives?â
âSure there is love. There are a lot of songs in Guren that are about those who fall in love but arenât promised to each other. If you are of lower station, you can marry for love. And same-sex relationships -- happen. And you can get away with it if youâre of lower station. If you have obligations, love is frivolous. I know of some who take mistresses or companions but it is a life in the shadows and people may bring it up if you do not produce children or it impacts your obligations.â
Kyo hated how much he had to say the word obligation. Did the Chosen of Song not have to worry about producing children? He considered asking but decided that would be too nosy.
The way Kyo spoke of obligations confused Badr. Of course he had responsibilities back home. He was never idle for a moment in Simurgh...and yet they didnât feel like obligations exactly. At least not how Kyo kept saying it, because it seemed what Kyo was really saying was âburdens.â And he had never found being Chosen of Songâeven if it meant he couldnât go out and play, and even if it meant he was busy from dawn to duskâa burden.
âDo theâŚâcompanionsâ get to choose? You donât really have sex slaves, do you?â he asked, that look of horror creeping back into his face.
âIn my clan, it is love,â Kyo shrugged a little. âWe do not do sex slaves in my country.â He leaned back in his chair and raised an eyebrow, âThis topic has you vexed -- about same-sex partners, Badr. Why is that, if you do not mind me asking?â
It did cause him to think about the treats Gaius had given him. The smile he gave when Kyo showed how much he enjoyed it. He blushed a little but, he maintained his composure.
Badr relaxed. He thought he might have had to excuse himself if Kyo had said yes. It would simply be...well, happily he didnât have to worry about it for now.
âI find it mysterious,â Badr replied. âThe idea that love would only be exchanged between men and women...that partnerships could only be founded on that pairing. That is not the way of Simurgh. We search for harmony, so if the person you are most harmonious with is a man...that is fine. Families will be built around that, and by allowing people to live as their hearts dictate, well, the village flourishes. So I do not understand this limitation, nor do I understand why a devotion to Crystalism requires a life of celibacy.â
Badr was what someâin another time, in another placeâmight call a nerd.
And he was annoyed that this concept was so confusing for him.
Kyo recrossed his arms as he looked up at the ceiling considering what Badr spoke about. He had to marry the Chosen of Nature. If not, there would be no alliance. If the Chosen of Nature had been a man, it would have been his sisterâs obligation. Because the child that would be born would belong to both clans even if nominally by the one.
âThat is not how it goes in my country if you are part of the major clans. Those children need to happen. It strengthens families between the clans. To marry someone of the same-sex does not accomplish that goal. But if you fall in love with someone of the same gender then⌠you can still have a relationship. You can still support that person.â
He shrugged. âIf someone wants to be celibate, that seems to be a choice and devoting yourself to Crystalium is just part of the package. Do you⌠fancy someone who has taken such a vow?â He grinned a bit wickedly, forgetting he was not with Zuya.
âNo, but Prince Gaius tells me that the Chosen of Light is always the Crown Prince, and all other princes must become Disciples of Crystalismâwho are celibate, because some old sage wrote in his papers that they ought to beâŚâ He tried to hide the derision in his tone.
Who knew WHO was listening?
But it came out anyway.
âI suppose Guren is...less constrictive, then. At least less than Serenitas. But families that are formed of two same partners still have children in Simurgh. I suppose in your case, the importance is that the child somehow shares the blood of the would-be feuding families. But does that really keep the peace?â He paused, flipping idly through his book. âSo then, if a man were to engage in continuous physicality with you, you would find it...well, you might be inclined to believe there was a romantic expression, or would you not? Would it simply be some sort of...brotherhood to you?â
Kyo nodded, âWe have those who follow Crystalium in Guren too. They pledge celibacy as well. I donât follow it too closely.â He shrugged. But he did note the derision in Badrâs tone. Suddenly, he felt his heart leap into his chest. Does⌠Badr fancy Gaius? That shouldnât bother him, that thought, but it does a tiny bit anyway.
âYes, we are not as constrictive as this place. This reminds me of a bee hive. Everyone has a job and there is no deviating from that job,â he lidded his eyes. âAnd the marriages have kept the peace thus far so who am I to question that?â
At Badrâs hypothetical, Kyo studies the other man, âUh⌠I guess I would wonder what is the context? Were you training? If you were training, that happens. It is not romantic. Spending a lot of time with warriors, there is ⌠intimacy but it is not necessarily sexual or romantic.â
Kyo made a note to remember this conversation if he ever sparred with Badr. Make it clear he is not interested.
âA beehive,â Badr agreed. âOr an anthill.â Somehow, though it was fanciful, he liked to think that bees had a little more freedom than ants. Maybe it was because they could fly, and maybe that was a foolish bias...but he still thought it. He stared down at the page heâd arrived on. It was well ahead of what he was trying to memorize. He began flipping back to his previous place, quietly considering Kyoâs reply.
Titus did seem to believe they were engaged in some sort of...sparring. Except that this sparring seemed like it could happen any place at any time, and it did not require Badr saying he was interested. It just sort of happened, and Gaius had told him that was how Titus shared his affections. Titus seemed entirely incapable of internalizing that men might have romantic or salacious feelings for other men. But Badr most definitely did have those feelings when Titus had his hands in his robes, alone on a gazebo under the starlight.
He didnât know how to tell Titus that this was making him terribly confused. And, well, a little sad, too.
âSo perhaps that is what âwar companionsâ means,â he finally said, avoiding answering too directly. âWe do not touch each other in such ways in Simurgh, however, unless there is an intention. So you are betrothed, then?â
âSome sort of mindless hive-minded insect,â Kyo shrugged his more cynical side coming out, âIt could be. I havenât looked too much about Serentian culture that has no impact on me.â
The conversation had been so good not bringing up Kyoâs personal life and then Badr had to go there. He squared his jaw as his dark eyes flashed with annoyance, âYes. I am betrothed to the Chosen of Nature. We will wed after university.â
He stared at Kyo. Not because he was betrothed to a fellow Chosenâand not of his choosingâbut because he had outright said he wasnât interested in anything about Serenitas that didnât immediately impact him. It was like Titus telling him didnât like reading history, so he didnât know anything about something as splendidly curious as these war companions sounded to be. He immediately wanted to see Cinna, to ask her what she thought accounted for this lack of curiosity. All these restrictive societal mores, the disinterest in anything that was not immediately neededâwas this why the other countries found themselves in conflict so much? It was a valuable lesson, he thought; he absolutely would have to brew a pot of lavender tea and discuss it with Cinna later. Though he was also beginning to fear he might not have an intellectual equalâoutside of Cinnaâhere in Serenitas, and much like the apparent ban on male relationships...that was disappointing.
He found his place in the book, putting his cheek back in his palm, and his fingers lazily danced over the words until he found the place heâd left off.
âWell, Iâm sure youâll have lovely children,â he said. Crystalism now seemed even more questionable to him than ever before. It seemed terribly convenient that the crystals seemed to keep âchoosingâ people who were already quite prominent in their communities. He thought it might really be more a case of monarchies maintaining their powers by insisting on some sort of spiritual superiority.
He was glad he was from Simurgh.
Perhaps it was a bit rude to just end the conversation there, but they were in a library, so he thought it made sense enough that they both ought to go back to their studies. He began reading once again, but this time, he tried to keep from sighing so much, thinking it would be rude to distract Kyo from his own studies.
Kyo didnât like how Badr just stared at him. What did he say? Who was he to pass judgment on him? It is not like he just said he didnât care that much about Serenitas history.
Then the flippant comment about his future children. He felt the fire smoke up inside of him. He didnât want to have stupid kids. He didnât want to be Emperor one day. He didnât know what he wanted beyond just the ability to do what he wanted. And the fact that Badr could say he would have beautiful kids. What did he know?
âYeah. Wonderful kids,â he replied back, his words clipped and harsh. He closed his book, to his feet suddenly, and decided he need to work off this rage.