Eaten by Weasels (eatenbyweasels) wrote in ebw_buffyslash, @ 2008-03-22 16:47:00 |
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Entry tags: | 15, giles/wesley, humour |
Wood. Giles/Wesley. 15
My entry for lostgirlslair's Drunk!Gilesathon!
For mischloran, who wanted; scarf-wearing, Wesley and a butterfly, no angst nor unhappy ending nor the mention of any Christmas Song. So sank my hopes of getting to write Giles/Dawn NC17 s/m suicide pact!angst, with wasps, based on the lyrics to “Frosty the Snowman.” Instead, I offered her…
Wood
"Shhhh! She's asleep!"
"Rupert? I told you I'd get the logs. You're in no fit state. And who's asleep?"
"Butterfly. Sssssh!"
"Butterfly.........? Rupert, it's the middle of the blasted winter. You get like this every time Ethan and Andrew bring round a sherry trifle. Lord knows what else they put in it."
"Here, look, see? Nestled all cosy in the logs? They don’t have to die off with the first frosts, y’know. Just need somewhere warm and - sshhhhh! - quiet to sleep."
"Oh, yes, I see her now. She is rather lovely, I must admit. Tell you what; I'll take the logs from the other pile, so as not to disturb your butterfly, whilst you, who are quite evidently not equipped to over-winter in the woodshed, get your drunken arse back inside.”
"You’re such an old fusspot! I've got my new scarf on, haven't I?"
"And very fetching it looks, too. Matches the whites of your eyes. However, I can’t help but notice that you are otherwise entirely naked. And as pissed as a fart. Go back in to the lounge - and don't play with the fire! Now what's so funny?"
"Just a yellow scarf..... I'm Rupert the Bare!"
"Yes, utterly hilarious. Tell it to the doctors when they wheel you through to the pneumonia ward."
"Alright, alright, Mother, I'm going. See if there's any trifle left that isn't being licked off Andrew."
"Oh, God, not again! Those two seem to know instinctively when I've just had the sheepskin shampooed. I really can't turn my back on you lot for a second, can I? "
"You should, though, y'know, Wesley. You have such a lovely back for turning."
"I've been known to have not dissimilar thoughts about yourself, Rupert. With or without your somewhat startling neck attire. Well, that's all the logs I can carry, so let's have you back indoors before you catch your death."
"Have me back indoors? I might hold you to that! You reckon there's room for two more on that sheepskin, then?"
"I could live without watching Ethan eat mandarin segments out of Andrew's arse-crack, if I'm honest. But I'm sure we could sneak past them to the bedroom. I daresay a nice bit of friction would warm you up a treat.... and what's the joke this time, Rupert?"
“Well, take a look! You might have the logs, Wesley, old boy, but you're not the only one coming back from the shed with wood!"
*runs away*