The last time Riley got behind the wheel of a car, it had ended badly. Don't think about that now. It wasn't the last time, either. Not anymore. The last time, now, was yesterday. Riley had gone by the dealership, and walked the lot, and sat through half an hour's predatory financing pitch with Big Jim himself, and came away from it with the keys to this old thing.
He had driven it to the edge of the woods without incident. Now he was driving it into town the same way. Hopefully. Ideally. At least his hands didn't get clammy with nervous sweat now that he was no longer human.
"Turn right in one hundred–"
"I know," Riley muttered over the GPS on his phone. The robotic voice didn't react, and he felt a little silly sassing it. But he knew where he was. He could hear heartbeats, even the background hum of muffled conversation. He could feel the distant stirrings of hunger.
Pickman beckoned, black roof peeking between green boughs, lights on in most of its windows. Riley pulled his new ride up to the curb and grabbed his phone off the dashboard.
I'm downstairs, he texted. He thought about getting out, and opening the door for Meggan, but staying in seemed like the safer choice.
The text wasn't entirely necessary. Meggan had been waiting, and she could feel him from at least a few blocks away now. Nervous. Tense. She felt her own palms begin to sweat, and she wiped them off in her jeans with a little huff, calming herself.
She waited patiently until she heard her phone chiming, jumping up to grab it and her bag before racing out her door and down the hall. With a brief wave at the front desk, Meggan threw open the doors and cleared the stairs with one effortless jump.
“Wow! Riley this car is so cool!” It reminded her of her world, reminded her of all the friends riding together in shows she watched, in boys picking up girls for dates. Except it's not a real date she corrected herself, and got into the passenger seat. “Are you sure you want to go still?”
Riley scoffed. "Are you kidding? I was born sure." It didn't have the right ring, but whatever. Meggan would forgive him. She forgave him a lot, especially when she better than anyone knew when he wasn't being one hundred percent truthful.
Like now. He did want to go, though. That was what mattered.
"I even talked them into playing our movie." By which he meant Dirty Dancing, obviously. Not so much their movie as a movie that Meggan liked and he hadn't seen in at least fifteen years. But he wasn't going for the nostalgia aspect. He wasn't even going for the drive-in experience. He was going for–
He glanced at Meggan. "You do something different with your hair? It, uh, looks nice."
Meggan rolled her eyes a little at his response, but laughed all the same. “Alright alright. You know I can feel when you’re lying right? Better than other people.” Because they’d been close for a while now. She spent enough time with him, she could pick his emotions out of a crowd. From across town. She could certainly tell that he wasn’t being totally honest with her.
That was okay, though.
She was easily distracted by the fact that he got them to play Dirty Dancing and she let out a little excited squeak before she covered her face with her hands, bouncing excitedly in the seat. “Did you really? Oh, Riley this is going to be so cool on such a big screen!” She was a little surprised he noticed her hair, though, and she smiled.
It was kind of easy, being a shapeshifter, to do something different with your hair. Currently, she’d been kind of fangirling over Rogue, so her hair was just a touch curlier than it usually was. Messier, but in a cool way. “It’s just a bit curlier I guess… Thank you. I thought it was fun for tonight.”
Maybe she was trying to be a little impressive.
Of course Riley knew that. Sometimes it made him feel naked and vulnerable. Sometimes it was nice to know someone understood what was going on without his having to say anything. Fine balance to walk, but they were managing. Sort of.
"It looks nice. I like how you wear it most of the time, too, though," he added, recalling what Meggan had told him about Asshole Brian. He scraped a hand over the bristle on his head. "Maybe I'll dye mine blue next time. So you're not the only one making an effort. Or do you think pink is more my color?"
The drive-in wasn't far; before Riley knew it, without even an ounce of the anxiety he'd been swimming in since he left the cabin, they were suddenly there, one car in a short queue, waiting to pick their spot before the large, outdoor screen.
"Huh. Looks… just like the movies," Riley said. "Don't know why that comes as a surprise, but here we are."
Meggan blushed, still not used to getting compliments like that. There was always a caveat. Always a subtle feeling underneath the compliment that said but… and she would shift, subtly, to try and match what they wanted. What he'd always wanted.
She never felt that with Riley, though.
“Hmmmm, could try purple to get a mix of both. I don't think you've got enough hair to dye though. Not that that's a bad thing!” She added quickly. When the car slowed, Meggan slid herself closed to him and touched his head with her hand, essentially petting him. “It's soft.”
She was only distracted from doing that for longer because of the drive-in. As soon as she saw that big screen, she bit her lip and bounced in her seat again. “I've never been to a movie before.” Meggan admitted, looking away a little ashamed. “Not out like this.”
Riley could've stopped her, if he'd wanted to. He had quick reflexes. He saw her move before she'd reached across.
He could've stopped her, but he didn't want to.
Damn distractions. Timely, maybe, saving him from doing – or saying – something stupid, but still. Damn distractions.
"Never?" Why did that surprise him? With everything Meggan had told him about her childhood, it made sense. "Well, in that case, we're going all out. Popcorn, Cokes…" He killed the engine but left the key in the ignition. "Sign said we should be getting the audio on…" He scrolled through the radio channels until he found the right frequency. "Not as authentic as hanging a speaker on the window of your car, but I guess this way we can turn it up if it's too quiet? You're in charge of the sound. I'll get snacks."
And after, too. As much as he'd enjoy listening to the movie, he was mostly there just for Meggan.
Of course he wouldn't stop her. Meggan knew that. She could feel what he did, when she touched him. She just knew there was… something there. Maybe. Maybe it was all just her own feelings and she was projecting them. Like it was with Bryan. Shaping herself into something wantable, her own feelings of attraction making them feel that, too.
Meggan scooted away rather abruptly, unsure. “I think it's nice through the radio, though I guess I've only ever seen the ones with the speakers. This feels like you can hear it better.” She agreed, giving him a more hesitant smile.
“Okay, I can do that! I'll make sure the sound is right while you get snacks. Oh! Can you get chocolate? Any chocolate. I really like chocolate with my popcorn.” She smiled a little brighter, a bit cheesy and clearly a bit of a begging grin, because she did really want chocolate.
She could have asked him for the Golden Fleece and Riley would've tried to get it. He couldn't remember the last time he felt that way about someone. Then again, he'd never really had close friends, back in Chicago. Friendly rivals, maybe, all of them competing for promotions or recognition or hot women.
And prison wasn't exactly built for friendship, either.
Because that was all this was, he told himself as he returned to the car laden with two kinds of popcorn, three different kinds of chocolate, potato chips, and Twizzlers. Drinks, too, because he wasn't sure if Meggan preferred Coke or Ice Tea or Sprite, so he'd bought all three. In a friendly way.
The movie had already started, soundlessly playing on the large screen before a smattering of parked cars. The Galaxie wouldn't have stood out at all among them but for the familiar heartbeat within. Riley tapped a knuckle on the driver side window. "Can you get the door?" He had no fingers to spare.
Sound had started to come through the speaker - some commercials or something, advertisements for popcorn. She ate it up, leaning forward in the seat with her hands on the dash, her chin on top of her hands. All the while, she was feeling for Riley - his unique emotional climate like a teddy bear or a blanket. Something comforting.
So she didn’t jump when he knocked on the window, but she did turn quickly, brow raised. What on earth was he doing? He didn’t even eat! “Riley, what -” She scooted over and pulled the handle, slowly pushing the door out when he moved out of the way of it. Reaching her hands out to take whatever Riley couldn’t keep holding onto, she laughed.
“Riley, you don’t even eat.” She said in almost a whisper, “You got all this for me? Or are you going to try and see if it tastes good this time around? For science.”
"For science," Riley agreed. The thought hadn't even occurred to him. None of the food smelled appetizing, for one thing. For another, well, he'd bought it with Meggan in mind. "It's a pretty long movie, right?" A little over an hour and a half barely justified half the amount of popcorn and candy that now peppered the dashboard. Whatever. He had no regrets.
Riley shut the door behind him and nodded toward the large screen, where the commercials had wrapped up and Baby was in the backseat of her parent's car, driving down the highway back in 1963. "Looks like I got back just in time." He didn't reach for the radio controls to turn the volume up, though. Those were still Meggan's to fiddle with as she chose – once she freed a hand from the bags of popcorn, that is.
She settled the popcorn around her side - no point in sharing really, he could grab a piece if he wanted one but she doubted he'd like it any more than the chips. Once her hands were free, she turned the volume up just a touch before sliding over, pressed close to Riley.
“Very good timing. This is so surreal. Being in a drive in watching a movie…” Sometimes she couldn't believe her life had changed so much. The amount of time she'd spent stuck in the caravan was ten times as long as she'd been out and about. She'd almost never been free enough to walk around, get a job.
She leaned her head on Riley’s shoulder, getting comfortable. “For future reference, iced tea or lemonade.” Meggan whispered, smirking. She wasn't the biggest soda drinker, though movies were definitely the exception to that.
Riley tensed. "Do you want me to get–" Meggan seemed to press her head a little more firmly into his shoulder, as if to say stay put. He got the message. Between the smell of popcorn filling the interior of the car and the sound of the film drifting out of the Galaxie's radio speakers, it was almost easy to forget where he was.
This might have been any drive-in movie theater on the mainland. Meggan might have been a girl he was seeing – someone nice he met in college, maybe, and brought home to meet his mom and dad. Someone he was thinking of settling down with, instead of chasing skirts all over Chicago.
Surreal. Yeah.
At some point, without even realizing, he noticed that his hand had migrated to Meggan's knee. Not in a creepy way – he hoped. Just resting there. Familiar. Kind of useless. A one-hundred percent, totally friendly knee-touch. Nothing more.
He was tense for a bit, but eventually she felt him relax and she relaxed right along with him. She stayed right where she was, reaching out for popcorn every so often. It really did feel like they could be anywhere, like this could be any place. Meggan’s mind drifted, imagining meeting Riley in her own world or his, if she were from it. They could go anywhere they wanted. See every drive-in theatre in the world.
As it were, she didn’t mind being stuck in Dunwich with Riley.
Her hand eventually moved to rest on top of his, the one on her knee. She moved a little shifting just slightly as if to indicate she wanted to be let in, leaning more comfortably against him. Maybe with his arm around her.
“Ooh the montage is the best part.” She said, her voice still low and soft. This was where he was trying to teach baby how to dance, and they went through hours and hours of practice in the little montage. In the water, too, which Meggan found to be highly romantic.
"Every good movie has a montage," Riley agreed, his arm curling around Meggan's shoulders. "Rocky, Flashdance… The Breakfast Club…" He couldn't think of another, partly because he hadn't seen many movies in the last four years, partly because having Meggan so close made it hard to think clearly.
Not in a bad way. Unfortunately.
Not in a way that made him put some distance between them.
After the montage came drama. Riley found himself torn between paying attention as Baby's happy bubble exploded around her and fixating on Meggan's thumb rubbing circles on the back of his hand. At some point he must've turned his hand so their palms lay on top of each other. Purely by accident. A friendly, platonic accident.
Meggan got really into movies. Right along with the characters, she felt their heartbreak, their joys, their anger. At some point she'd ended up gripping Riley’s hand when something bad happened, her fingers lacing throw his as her hand relaxed.
Like that, Riley got glimpses of Meggan’s feelings - sometimes interrupted by the people around them. Most predominantly was content, Meggan felt so at peace like this it was easy to just be happy for once.
There were other things, too.
A little anticipation. Some nervousness. She felt a bit on edge, waiting for something. Was that her? Was she being influenced perhaps by a nearby car with a nervous couple inside? Meggan didn't pay attention to that. She scooted closer into Riley, hand held tight. “Thank you.” She whispered.
On screen, Baby's heartbreak seemed complete. Her dad disappointed in her and she in him, Johnny fired from his job and the family vacation nearly over. All very cinematic. All very dramatic.
In the quiet of Riley's new car, it was nothing like that.
Just two people holding hands, the smell of fresh popcorn heavy in the air.
"You're welcome," Riley replied and realized he was looking at Meggan's lips, realized that she was so very close he could have just–
Just contentment, and safety, or the illusion of either, as heady a drug as liquor, lulling Riley into forgetting himself, just for a second and–
–kissing Meggan. Chastely, sure. But kissing her all the same.
It was even better the second time, watching it. Not that she had seen it all that long ago in her own world, but now it was on a big screen, just her and Riley and she could really feel what she was watching. The ups and downs of the movie, from the most dramatic and sad parts to the happy ones ran through her easily.
She was so enthralled with it that she actually couldn’t tell - didn’t predict what was coming.
Riley’s lips pressed against hers, quick - too quickly. She chased his lips, kissing him back, perhaps a little less chaste than he had kissed her - but the nerves got to her, and she pulled back, uncertain now. His emotions were a mess and so were hers, and she could very intensely feel everyone around them as well.
“Riley… did you - did you mean to do that? Did you want to?” She asked, a little breathless, still clutching his hand.
Riley's thoughts had become a continuous litany of oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. Entirely justified, even if for a moment there Meggan had kissed him back. Meggan had also pulled away and was looking at him with wariness in her expression.
Or maybe that was just his own panic projected. For once, not being able to untangle his feelings as neatly as he would've liked was actually inconvenient.
But one thing was certain: "I… I shouldn't have done that," Riley blurted out. On screen, the music swelled, Johnny coming to Baby's rescue, the climactic lift just seconds away. "I'm sorry." He freed his hand from around Meggan's shoulders. From her hand. "Wow, I, uh… I guess I got caught up in the movie."
In Dirty Dancing. Which was notoriously mind-altering.
Meggan felt the rejection deep and she slid away from Riley when he dropped her hand, nearly knocking over the popcorn. “Oh.” Was all she said in response, clutching the popcorn bowl in her lap, and staring intently at the screen.
It did not stop her from crying, just a little.
She wiped the tears that did bubble up away as quickly and discreetly as she could, chewing her lower lip. It was probably her fault. Just like Brian, who only seemed to love her when she was near.
Maybe it would always be like that. Only wanted because they were reflecting her own feelings. “I think I'm going to walk home.” She finally said, the wobble in her voice apparent.
"What? No-" Riley turned in his seat, reaching for her, at first, then thinking better of it and dropping his hand. "Meggan, come on… I fucked up, I'm so sorry, but that's not… You don't have to…" He faltered, pointed weakly at the screen. "You're missing the best part."
Not that the movie seemed to matter much, anymore.
He slumped back against the driver side door and blew out a breath. "I won't do it again. I'm – not that kind of guy, I promise." But wasn't he? He'd kissed Theo in the park all those months ago. He'd been a pushy flirt, back in Chicago.
Maybe Meggan was right to want to get as far from him as possible.
Outside, thunder clapped loud overhead. Meggan turned from him after he reached out and took that back, too, trying to keep her emotions in check. The sky threatened rain, a few drops already falling.
“What? I know you're not that kind of guy.” She said, fighting the urge to roll her eyes. He was such an idiot sometimes. Her hurt seeped out, easily latching on to the people around them, Riley included.
Pulling it back not quite quick enough so that the feelings didn't linger, Meggan’s face started to change, her features and shape all becoming softer, rounder. Her hair fell flat, reflecting how she felt. Unwanted. Unattractive. “I can just walk back.
Embarrassed, Meggan opened the door, still clutching the popcorn for dear life.
"Meggan, stop!" But she wasn't going to, so Riley shoved open his own door and stumbled out. Sound spilled out of the car, the end credits scrolling on screen. With no post-end credits scene worth sticking around for, a few of the other cars in the lot were revving engines, wipers scraping against windshields as a sudden, unforecast rain began to drum down.
Rain spattered on Riley's t-shirt, too, but he hardly noticed as he rounded the car, moving just slightly faster than the eye could see. "Meggan, for Christ's sake!" He planted himself in her path, breathing hard when he didn't have to breathe at all. Didn't fool himself thinking he could keep her there against her will.
Didn't want to do that. Ever. He just–"I did, okay? I did want to kiss you." Meggan had asked. He might as well be honest, even if it cost him everything. "That wasn't you. It was me. I know it was… because I've been wanting to do it for a while." When Meggan was around – and when she wasn't, too.
She wasn't sure she believed him. She could tell she wasn't totally in control of herself, worried that he was only coming after her because she wanted him to. It was stressful, and she wasn't sure what to think at this point.
Meggan watched him for a moment, the rain coming down with more force and ruining her popcorn. “You go home and I'll go home and you tell me you wanted to do that tomorrow. You text me and tell me if you really wanted that.”
Because she did. She did want that, and it was confusing sometimes and scary, because her first relationship had gone so poorly. She stood on her toes, reaching up to kiss his cheek. She'd gotten shorter, too. “Okay? You gotta call me or text me and tell me that's what you really wanted.”
Her lips brushing his rain-damp cheek felt like a goodbye. It was a goodbye.
And maybe… maybe that was for the best. Because for all that he had worked up the courage to be honest, for all that he accepted that he had done wrong, now he wasn't sure if he believed what he said, either.
(Meggan didn't. And her feelings washed over Riley in a tidal wave of doubt and hurt and fear, until he couldn't tell what was hers and what was his. The shame, certainly. The hurt, too. The doubt, now that he thought about it. The doubt.)
"Okay," Riley said, resigned.
He lingered there, in the waning drizzle, until Meggan vanished: first from his sight, then her heartbeat melting away into silence. The movie was long over by then, the screen gone dark. The other cars had driven off.
Eventually, Riley climbed behind the wheel of his new car, and drove away, too. Alone with his doubts.