ruby atwater ⭐ lorna dane. (polaire) wrote in dunhavenic, @ 2019-02-01 23:10:00 |
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Entry tags: | !log, * jamie, * kit, c: matias marquez, c: ruby atwater |
WHO: Matias Márquez & Ruby Atwater
WHEN: Friday, February 1, 2019; Late Night
WHERE: Matias’ Apartment
SUMMARY: Matias says the thing and Ruby has an internal freakout.
PROMPT: The “I Love You” Stigma
WARNINGS: None, really.
The last few moments before sleep were Ruby’s favorite moments of the day. They were the moments in which only she and Matias existed, slowly drifting into a comfortable sleep, the weight of them settling into the mattress, their legs tangled together as her head found its place in the nook of his shoulder. Her fingers fingers ran idly over the inked art over his torso. Sometimes it was hard to believe that she’d known him much less than a year because, most of the time, she was sure she’d know Matias her entire life. It was a thought that ought to have terrified her but Ruby had long ago learned how to bury her feelings deep inside where even she couldn’t reflect on them and if she couldn’t think about what this level of comfort meant for her, or them, then there really wasn’t anything to think about at all. She let her hand brush over his side as her arm draped over his middle and she pulled herself closer to him. Mentally, Ruby ran through a quick checklist--teeth brushed, leftovers stuffed in the refrigerator where she could find them in a few hours when she inevitably needed to eat again, medication taken, check, check, check. Or at least she was pretty sure she’d done all of the above. She was confident about the first one, and confident enough about the last to that she wasn’t about to lose any sleep over it. Tilting her head back, Ruby looked up at Matias with sleepy eyes, a small smile flickering at the corners of her mouth. “What are the chances we can cancel everything tomorrow and stay here exactly like this all day?” She asked it every night and usually it was an impractical request because they were both busy in their own ways. It didn’t stop her from wishing for it, though, because Ruby was more than content to stay enveloped right here in this moment with him. Matias smiled as the expected question came from Ruby, his arm tightening around her to hold her a bit closer. As always, it wasn't in the cards; there was always something, be it too much homework, a far too early class, or a rare morning shift at the bookstore that left him having to open. He cherished those mornings where they both were able to sleep in, just staying all wrapped together as their alarm clocks were dismissed and they could simply be lazy for a couple hours more. It was never all day, but he never regretted those slow mornings. "I wish," he murmured, turning his head to press a kiss to Ruby's forehead. "It's very hard leaving this bed with you still in it, you know." When Matias had come to Dunhaven, he hadn't expected to meet someone like Ruby. He was meant to do his time at law school, focusing on his studies and making whatever extra money he could on the side, and then take his knowledge back to Texas or somewhere else entirely. Three years was a long time to not meet people or make friends and he'd assumed both might happen, but not quite like with Ruby. She had slid into his life in such a way that he wasn't entirely sure how it was she hadn't been there the entire time. It was unlike anything he'd experienced before in a relationship and Matias hoped that could only mean good things. Ruby’s smile spread even wider, a mischievous edge to it. “Out of curiosity, what could I possibly do to make it even harder for you to leave this bed with me still in it?” She lifted her hand, her fingers curling around his wrist and then sliding down to entwine with his. It was these little, constant touches, as much as the big, all-consuming touches that she lived for. She brought their hands to her lips, turning them at the last second so that her kiss landed against his knuckles. “Hypothetically speaking, of course. I wouldn’t dream of pulling you away from your various types of work.” "Hmm, hypothetically speaking," Matias started, his voice slow, as though he were considering her question with the same amount of gravity as he might a final essay on an exam. His arm that was looped around Ruby moved, his fingers making slow, easy paths up and down her upper arm, a trail of goosebumps left in their wake. "Honestly, if you just asked me to stay when I was half asleep, I don't think I'd ever have the willpower to say no." He paused and smiled. "I probably shouldn't have let you know you had this superpower." Shrugging, Ruby ruefully replied, “I’m so sorry that I inevitably have to use this information against you.” And she would use it, at some point, but she would absolutely not be sorry because she could never apologize for wanting to hold onto Matias, and their little pocket of the universe, just a little bit longer. Reluctantly pushing herself up, she leaned over him, letting her hair blanket the side of his face as she pressed a kiss to his lips. “Stay,” she requested preemptively, the words getting caught against his mouth. Matias might have laughed, if he wasn't too preoccupied leaning up just enough to kiss her again as soon as the words had formed on her lips. He pushed his fingers through her hair, pulling it away from where it brushed against his face until his fingers made their way through and it fell back down in a gentle wave. "I didn't realize it was going to be used against me so quickly," he replied, letting his nose ghost over hers as he now let out a soft laugh. Lifting his hand again, Matias's fingers grazed over Ruby's cheekbone, drinking her in through the dim light of the bedroom. He was struck again by just how much of a surprise she had been and continued to be. She was beautiful, ridiculously talented, and always kept him on his toes through her wit and humor. He had never met another person quite like her and doubted he ever would. "Eres un tesoro, Ruby Atwater." “What did you just call me?” Ruby asked, intending to be playful, but finding it difficult when she was so distracted by the whisper of a touch on her face. She closed her eyes, her smile unsuppressed even as she pressed her lips together. "A treasure," Matias translated, cupping her face against his palm. His thumb brushed along her cheekbone as he hesitated for just a breath, then added, "Because you are one." He took in a quick breath, as though he was going to say more, but he paused again. He knew what he wanted to say, the moment feeling warm and right, but it didn't stop him from needing to summon his courage before he said softly, "I love you." The moment he paused, it was like Ruby could feel it in her bones that she wasn’t going to want to hear what came next. If she’d been faster, or had better reflexes, maybe she could have swallowed the words for him, but she hadn’t been and the words hung there, instead, between them. Her breath hitched in her throat and it took every ounce of will to keep her features from reflecting the panic she felt inside. Ruby Atwater didn’t want him to be in love with her. She didn’t want to love anyone in return. She’d learned the lesson too young that loving people only gave them the power to hurt you and, though it wasn’t unavoidable altogether, she could choose to limit the amount of damage she let into her own heart. Those three words should have been like freedom, or slipping into clean sheets or a hot bath, especially coming from Matias. Instead, they were like ice, like suffocation, like drowning. She opened her mouth to respond but shut it again, suddenly feeling much colder than she had even five minutes before. The words died on her tongue and she panicked, opting to respond, instead, with a kiss that rendered words unnecessary. Because if there was one thing Ruby was good at, it was finding destructive ways to avoid the things that terrified her. With each silent second that passed, Matias felt his own panic rise. He'd only said those words to one other girlfriend before, his first girlfriend way back when they were still teenagers and he hadn't really known what they meant. Even now, he didn't think he was some expert, but he knew in his gut that what he felt for Ruby could only be called love. He didn't necessarily expect her to feel the same or to even echo the words right then as he could be that presumptuous, but he could hope. And then Ruby kissed him and that was more than enough for the moment. Receiving the kiss and then kissing her back both suitably distracted him and helped dismiss his worries; a kiss might not have been an I love you, too, but that was all right with Matias. |