bea prewett ☆ tris prior. (stiff) wrote in dunhavenic, @ 2018-07-17 22:51:00 |
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There were few things that Bea enjoyed more than evenings spent in the company of two of her favorite people: Noah and Josie. Tonight was no exception. Despite the midweek holiday, Bea had been ready for the weekend after three long shifts working on inventory at Wilkerson's plus the time she volunteered to help out around Danielle's office. And while she would have been content to be at home sharing a bowl of popcorn with her sister, this was the kind of night she'd needed. It was important to her that Josie and Noah be friends and not just because the three of them shared the same memories, so she was happy that they'd both been up for a chill evening sitting out on Noah's balcony and just hanging out before they were meant to meet up with Beau at the carnival. As they sat there in the brief stretch of comfortable silence, a resonating boom sounded overhead. More fireworks. She didn't inherently dislike fireworks. She enjoyed the show from Wednesday night, actually. It was just that she found them to be unnecessary on the several days after the Fourth. Unnecessary and inconsiderate, really. She raised her glass and took a long drink of sweet tea as the colorful sparks showered down and sprinkled the night sky followed by several quicker, sharper booms. And, as though there had been no moment of transition at all, Bea was no longer sitting on Noah's balcony but was crouched down in an alleyway aiming her gun at the approaching Dauntless soldiers, the pops of gunshots ringing in her ears as she shot blindly at her pursuers. Tris' mother had just sacrificed herself for the sake of Tris' survival and the vision of her falling lifeless to the ground was on repeat in her head. These were probably not the soldiers who had done it but, at this point, did it matter? Her grief didn't seem to think so. Two were down now at her fire, and then...Will. He didn't recognize her and wouldn't recognize her. Her heart broke but she didn't hesitate. Her, or Will. Will fell, her aim true, her eyes shut tight so that she couldn't see the consequences of her choice. Not willing to open her eyes, she stumbled away from the scene of the crime until she finally looked up and realized she was close, so close, to her father, to Caleb, to a life before Dauntless and simulations and guns and Will. Her own gun clattered to the ground and she turned to press her head against the wall, her first in her mouth to muffle the screams that eventually dissolved into sobs. The first thing Bea noticed as she came to was the concrete beneath her knees and the cool iron of the railing around the balcony against her forehead. Her throat was raw and her eyes burned and she wondered how long she'd been gone, how much she'd given away about the vision that had been plaguing her since before she'd met Noah. Hands were against her back but she couldn't look at who they belonged to. Whether it was Noah, or Josie, she knew she didn't deserve the comfort either one of them could provide. Not when they didn't know what she, what Tris had done. After hanging out and around Noah a couple of times now, Josie had determined that she liked the guy. At first she was skeptical, something she thought might have stemmed simply from the fact that he was so obviously Four. It mirrored Christina's feelings about him in a way, though Josie was quick to not let her alternate self (if that's even what Christina was) cloud her judgement of Noah. If she was so adamant in believing that she, as Josie, was separate enough from Christina to not feel guilt when it came to Beau not being part of that life, surely she could be separate enough to not let Four cloud her feelings about Noah. The relaxation that had come with hanging out at Noah's took a sudden turn, though, when Bea moved from drinking her tea and watching someone's fireworks they were probably setting off from a backyard somewhere to her knees. Josie reacted on instinct, surprise and concern flooding her system as she dropped next to her friend, a hand at her back as she tried to assess the situation. She glanced once toward Noah, then back to Bea. "Bea." Her voice was quiet and concerned, but firm. "Are you okay?" Noah was usually hesitant to get to know new people, but he had made exceptions recently. His first exception had been Bea, and she had completely turned his life up on end in the best way possible. It felt like he had known her longer than he had in reality, likely as a byproduct of the dreams they shared. Even still, he talked to her about things that he would tell no one else. He trusted her. That trust has led to another exception: Josie Reed. Bea’s best friend also had a role in their shared dreams, though he couldn't boast to knowing her as well in either iteration. Christina was brash and lacked tact and sometimes Four hadn't been a fan of the way that she had treated Tris, but Josie was more immediately likable. She was funny and a little silly at times, but Noah liked her more than he liked most people. He had dedicated himself to trying to get to know her, and that meant spending time with her. Most of that time had, thus far, been well spent. He was looking forward to seeing the carnival lights at night, and figured they would head that way before too long to meet up with Josie’s boyfriend. Those thoughts were pushed entirely to the side when Bea had collapsed to the ground on his balcony. He didn't know what it was: a reaction to something Tris or a reaction to the fireworks, though they hadn't seemed to bother her the other day. He was prepared to call someone if need be - her sister, Danielle, EMTs, her mother - but first they needed to know what was going on. The space was barely enough for Noah to fold himself down with both girls already crouched there, but he managed. He added his own hand to her back and reached up, tucking some hair back from her face where he could see streaked evidence of tears. His lips were drawn into a hard line of concern, and he and though he knew Josie had already asked, he couldn't help gently prying, “What happened, Bea?” He leaned just the slightest bit away, but not too far. He didn't want to crowd her, wanted to give her space to breathe, but he wouldn't leave her any more than Josie would. The part of her that was Bea was grateful for the fact that she was surrounded by people who loved her and wanted to be there for her. It wasn’t something she was willing to take for granted because having that sort of connection had been hard won for her. She’d gone most of her life having nothing but transient connections with others as they came and went in group homes and the various places she squatted in Nashville. She never wanted to unnecessarily jeopardize these relationships. The part of her that was Tris, though, recoiled at the touch. Tobias was almost certainly dead or about to be and Christina--god, Christina would never forgive her, if she made it through the night. She didn’t deserve her forgiveness, either, because she’d shot Will with no hesitation. Bea felt like she was going to throw up, but she closed her eyes and took deep breaths in and out through her nose until the feeling passed. A sweat had broken out over her forehead and she lifted a shaking hand to wipe her brow, trying to buy some time before she had to answer their questions. What could she tell them that would explain this away? Her thoughts were too full of the sounds of gunshots and the cries of the Abnegation and the dead look in Will’s eyes and the way deep red color spread so rapidly across her mother’s gray clothes. Gray and red were not compatible, they couldn’t reconcile in her mind. Choking back a small sob, Bea shook her head. “It’s nothing. A Tris memory. I don’t remember the details.” Her hand hastily brushed away a stray tear as she sat back on her heels, refusing to look at either of them lest she give herself away. “I’m fine, though. I’m--I’m sorry.” Sorrier than they could understand. Sorry for not saving the people she loved, sorry for being too selfish to save Will. Josie let Bea sit back, withdrawing her hand and giving her space as she needed it. The explanation she gave of it being a memory from Tris wasn't alarming, but it was concerning. Her own dreams about Christina had seemed to grow stagnant, either feelings or reiterations of moments she had already seen; too often they seemed to swing between sweet moments shared with Will to discovering his dead body. It had become easier to be numb to them, at least eventually. Christina's emotions were hard to forget when they felt so much a part of her as her own. What she was surprised by, though, was Bea's claim that she didn't remember the details of the memory. Josie's memories from Christina were always crystal clear, as though she had literally just lived them before she woke. They didn't fade like her more normal dreams would. Not wanting to push, though, she glanced toward Noah once again, then looked to Bea. "Don't be sorry," she assured her, concern still written on her face. "Do you need anything? Water or something?" Another round of fireworks burst overhead even as he momentarily met Josie’s gaze again, not quite believing Bea’s efforts at explaining what had happened. He was not an idiot. He knew that Bea was probably trying to process whatever she’d seen, and she might not want to talk about it right now, but whatever it was had shaken her. There was no denying that. He did not believe, however, that she simply didn’t remember anything. He didn’t believe that she was being honest, and that was the part that bothered him a little. Noah had been lied to enough in his life to highly value honesty. His concern for whatever she was feeling was enough to override his natural inclination to push for the truth. At least, he truly thought it was. He had drawn taller, moving back so that both Josie and Bea had more room if they chose to stand. His jaw had clenched as he reminded himself that while she was crying and clearly upset, it wasn’t the time to demand any more information than she wanted to give. Even as he thought he had convinced himself of this, he could feel the less likable tendencies of his personality pushing back. She was tough. She was resilient. She could handle anything, and if he let her clam up now, she might just bury it and keep lying. The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them, “You don’t need to apologize, Bea. Just tell the truth,” Noah insisted, “If it was really nothing or if you didn’t remember, you wouldn’t be about to fall apart. Nothing and fine sounds like a whole lot of bullshit.” Bea shook her head in response to Josie’s offer. “No, I’m good. Thanks.” Her tea had spilled when she’d shifted out of her chair because apparently temporary blackouts didn’t allow for remembering to set objects aside if you were holding them, but she wasn’t sure she really wanted to ingest anything at the moment, anyway. But then Noah spoke and she stiffened. He sounded so much like Tobias in that moment and the part of her that was still reliving the memory she’d just revisited responded to it. She could remember early on in Dauntless training when both she and Christina had agreed that Tobias was all sharp edges and, even when Tris had started falling in love with him, she’d struggled to keep her temper under control when he pushed her. Despite that feeling of certainty that she would never see Tobias again, that same defiance bubbled and boiled within her at Noah’s comments. “Right, because right now is the best time to give me the third degree,” she bit, standing up and turning to look at him as she stepped closer to Josie. “Read the damn room, Noah.” Her nostrils flared along with the Tris-shaped anger inside of her, anger that wasn’t really directed at him or Tobias but rather all complicated and mixed up and wrong. After a moment, she took a deep breath and let her gaze soften and fall to her feet. “That was misplaced.” This time when Josie shot a look at Noah, it was just plain irritated. She had come to easily associate him with Four since they had officially met, but at that moment he actually sounded like him. In that moment, she could have closed her eyes and felt like they were standing in Dauntless, training with him watching over them as their instructor. But, they weren't in Dauntless. They were in Dunhaven, at his apartment, and she couldn't help the glare -- even if she knew he was right. Bea wasn't telling them everything. Still, she didn't know how much it was her place to comment. Josie turned her face, looking at Bea and only hesitating for a second before asking, "Do you want to talk about it?" The sharp comeback from Bea and the accompanying glare by Josie were not unexpected, but Noah didn’t waver. He didn’t flinch. He had steadfastly resolved that he would prefer one or both of them got mad at him rather than just coddling her and letting her shut down. He had always thought that the analogy of ripping a band-aid off was apt. It was far easier to just get the hard parts over with instead of causing more pain by being afraid of it. He knew that he sounded like Tobias. Noah had heard the other boy’s voice ringing through his head enough to know that in this situation, he wouldn’t have stood by either. He was careful not to cross his arms over his chest for the sake of avoiding defensive and closed off body language, but he didn’t move any closer or offer any apologies. He was standing far enough back that if they wanted to leave the balcony, they could do so, but he hoped this would be resolved sooner rather than later. It was ultimately up to Bea. They couldn’t make her talk, but eventually they would likely all know what she had seen considering the fact that they were so entwined in each other’s lives in the dreams. He sighed, trying to find the softer, more considerate part of himself that was usually present in matters like this, “We’re all here for the long haul, Bea. No matter what happened, the dreams are not going to change that for us. The only reason I push is because I care a whole hell-of-a lot.” The answer, of course, was a resounding no. No, Bea didn’t want to talk about it anymore than she could guess Tris would. She studied Josie for a long moment and then looked back at Noah. Both of them deserved not to be kept in the dark, but she knew that the things she’d seen would hurt them--one more than the other. Then, again, she also knew that there was a very likely chance that, if she didn’t answer now, one or both of them would dream of it next and she had no idea if either of them would find out what she’d done. She had no idea if any of them would survive past these memories long enough to find out anything, at all. Pressing her lips together, she mulled over how to answer. She could shut them out again, but she imagined that would turn an otherwise great night into a disaster. It was her natural inclination, though, to throw up walls and keep her thoughts and her feelings to herself. With these two, that was not so often the case. She could tell them everything, but then she was pretty sure no one would be able to look at her the same again. She already felt the shame that Tris felt and if she could feel it when she hadn’t been the one to pull the trigger, didn’t that mean that they would likely feel it, too? Bea debated and then, hesitantly, decided to settle on a little bit of both. “There was an attack on Abnegation. The Erudite--or Jeanine, rather--developed a serum that turned the Dauntless into a mindless army that she used to attack and kill members of the Abnegation faction. I--Tris--was immune to it because she was...divergent. Just now,” her words trailed off, finding it difficult to put the actual memory into words, not because she couldn’t talk to them but because it hurt to process, in general. She swallowed another lump as red blotches crossed over her neck again, her eyes still stinging. “Just now, I saw my mother jump in front of Dauntless fire to give me a chance at survival. She died. And then I-- there were more Dauntless soldiers pursuing me and I had to shoot them. I didn’t--” Bea stopped, again, her fingers wringing the hem of her shirt as she looked away over the balcony. She wanted to say she didn’t have a choice, but she did. She’d shot the first two because she’d hated Dauntless as a whole for killing her mother. She’d shot Will because she’d cared more about herself than him. It was an ugly thought, but wasn’t that the truth of it? A true Abnegation would have let him shoot them, sacrificing their lives for his. She had never been selfless enough. “I shot them and then I was back here again.” Bea couldn’t look at Josie now. She couldn’t meet her eye. So she looked, instead, at Noah. Did that make him feel better? To hear her admit that Tris was a murderer? With every word Bea spoke, Josie felt her body grow colder. She had dreamed about the Abnegation attack, of course. It had haunted her dreams again and again. Christina had been powerless under the simulation as she pulled the trigger over and over, cutting off the screams and pleas of the men, women, and children as the shot rang in her ears. She hadn't been the only one that had lost control of her body and mind, but that knowledge hadn't made it any easier on Christina, nor had it made it any easier on Josie when she'd woken from it. It had taken her weeks to even speak of what she'd seen and, even then, she had only told Beau. "I've dreamed that." Josie's voice was quiet, having to force the words out as her gaze dropped. Her hands met in front of her, the fingers of her right spinning her ring on her left. "So many times. I couldn't -- Christina, I mean. She wasn't in control. She -- " She paused, closing her eyes for a second as she took in a breath, then looked at Bea. "She had no control over her actions. If Tris hadn't done what she did, they would have just killed her instead. She was defending herself." A moment too late, she realized what else Bea had said. Her mother had died protecting Tris. Josie didn't even have words for that. She couldn't imagine that sort of hurt. Hearing that there was an attack on Abnegation wasn’t actually shocking to Noah. He had dreams about what led up to that, as well. Tobias had been suspicious of Erudite for a long time, and he had been digging into it so much that he had pushed dangerous boundaries. He remembered that silent train ride and taking Tris by the hand to assure her that she wasn’t alone, but when they got off the train, she wouldn’t run. Then, Eric had nearly killed him. It had taken everything in him not to react as Eric placed that gun barrel to his head, but Tris had been the one to reveal herself first. After she had shot Eric in the foot and he had taken down his accomplice, they had run. As they had run, Tris had been shot and she had tried to get Tobias to leave her, but that one word still lingered in Noah’s mind even now: No. He had refused to leave her, and...then he had woken up. He didn’t know what happened after that, but perhaps they’d been separated if Tris had gotten to her mother...a mother who had died to protect her. He didn’t know what that was like. In Dauntless or here, it didn’t matter. He doubted either mother cared enough to do the same for him. “Everything that happened that day was horrible, but the blame is with Erudite and Dauntless leaders. Tris’s mother...it sounds like she made a split second decision and a sacrifice that she considered worth it. Those Dauntless soldiers would have killed Tris without ever knowing what they were doing, and it’s terrible that she was put into that situation...but wouldn’t doing anything less than exactly that make her mother’s sacrifice pointless? If Tris hadn’t killed them, how many other Abnegation would they have killed? It’s an impossible situation, Bea. There are no easy or good choices in the middle of something like that...it’s just...do or die.” Bea didn’t know why, but their attempts at assurance just stoked a brewing anger inside of her. It wasn’t anger toward them really. Maybe she was just frustrated that they didn’t understand, though she also knew that it was impossible for them to understand when she wouldn’t tell them the part that actually bothered her. The thing was that if it hadn’t been Will, Bea was pretty sure that Tris wouldn’t have had the same reaction. “Jos, you didn’t have a choice,” she told Josie quietly, still looking at Noah, instead. “There was no way for you to fight the sim, no way to do anything other than what instructions Jeanine’s programs fed you. I can’t possibly imagine waking up from that sim and realizing what you’d been made to do when you had your choices taken away from you.” She took in a shaky breath and curled her fists at her side, her nails digging painfully into the skin of her palms. “I’ve dreamt this scene a hundred times, though,” she confessed, unwittingly betraying the assumption that this had been the first time she’d seen it. “And all I can think about is how I didn’t have to kill hi--them.” She closed her eyes and felt the pressure of the trigger, the confidence in her aim, the surety that she’d shot him in the head. Her knuckles turned white with effort. “I could have disabled them. I could have aimed differently. Jesus, I could have hesitated for one fucking second. I had a choice when no one else did and now he’s dead because I made the wrong one.” Bea stopped, making a conscious effort to remind herself that, as real as it felt, it hadn’t just happened, it hadn’t happened to her, and she was Bea, not Tris. Josie's mind went back to the first time she'd had the dream of Christina walking around Abnegation with her fellow Dauntless, then coming out of the simulation to the horror of what she had done. Though she may have wanted to tell herself that Christina could have fought it, Josie knew it wasn't possible. She hadn't even realized that something was wrong until her mind was finally her own again, the control released from her limbs and her thoughts and actions hers. Josie herself would never be in such a position where she held someone's life in her hands and had to act quickly, making a decision that could very easily result in the ending of someone else's life or her own. But, though she wanted to tell herself that she didn't know what she'd have chosen, part of her felt that there was a very good choice that she, as Josie, would have done the same as Tris in her shoes. But, the one thing that she had been able to cling to that helped keep her from falling into despair was the reminder that she wasn't Christina. She was Josie, no matter how real the dreams felt and how much they would physically hurt at times. And though she didn't know if it would actually help Bea or that she was inadvertently echoing her thoughts, Josie's voice was soft as she said, "Tris. Tris made that decision, not you." Noah noted that Bea didn’t seem to be eager to look at Josie. She kept her attention mostly on him even when she spoke to her best friend and something about that unsettled him. He knew that this was hard for her to talk about. Obviously it had been a difficult thing for her to experience, even if she had - as she said - dreamed it a thousand times before. It didn’t seem to be impacting her any less considering how she had reacted to the dream. The fact that none of it had happened to any of them in this lifetime didn’t make it any less jarring. He felt things as surely as if he was Tobias, so she had reason to be upset even if she hadn’t really done anything wrong, “Maybe she could have done it differently, but she didn’t. It sounds like she didn’t have the time to calculate the decision or the consequences, but there’s still no guarantee that just disabling them would have worked. If they were under the sim, they might have processed the pain differently depending on what the sim was inputting to their mind. She could have disabled them and they still might have killed her anyway.” He paused, hesitating for a second. Noah had already pushed buttons and boundaries when maybe he shouldn’t have, but they were already deep into this and they didn’t seem to be any closer to getting Bea to relax. Even still, he wasn’t demanding as he spoke, “Who, Bea? You said he’s dead. Who is he?” Noah didn’t think it was Tobias. He had at least some Divergence and hadn’t been locked into the sim like the rest of Dauntless, but they had been captured. He didn’t know anything past that. Bea shook her head once, silently pleading with Noah not to ask the question. Tears slipped hot and more hastily down her cheeks as she pressed her lips together, trying to fight back the unwanted memory of Will's soulless expression, the protesting resistance of the trigger as she pulled it without hesitation, the certainty of her aim, the thud of his body that she wasn't sure if she'd heard or imagined. A nearly inaudible, terrible oh pushed through her lips as she dropped back into her chair, cradling her face in her hands. She needed this nightmare to stop. She needed the infinite loop of the attack, the sacrifice, and the kill to be done. Her voice barely above a whisper, she said, "She killed Will." And then, louder, each word tearing at her heart and crushing her with Tris' guilt-- "She killed Will." A chill that didn't belong to her went down Josie's spine as the words of the confession settled into her mind. They didn't make sense. They would never make sense. But, they clicked and formed and she knew what Bea was saying. Tris had killed Will. Christina's Will. The boy that she had allowed herself to open up to in a way that had been new and exciting, that she had felt herself coming to care for with every passing day, every shared secret, every flash of a smile. Josie's thoughts settled on the second half of the dream she had been plagued with more times than she could count and how real the loss felt whenever she relived it or even when she simply just recalled it. Will, dead on the ground -- and now, she knew, due to Tris's trigger finger. Josie's mouth opened, but no words came out. She found herself standing, taking a tentative step back, despite there not being far she could go without leaving Noah's balcony. "She -- " Her voice caught in her throat, then she forced herself to continue, repeating Tris's words with an air of disbelief. "She killed Will?" If she had refused to answer, Noah wouldn’t have pushed the issue. Maybe Tobias would have, but he could already see how hard this was on Bea and he didn’t need to be scolded twice for unwelcome prodding within the span of just a few minutes. Still, he hoped that she would find it in herself to be honest because it seemed like it was more than just the killing. Someone in particular had died and that was the root of the problem. He had stayed where he was, uncertain that she would want any comfort that he could give, and when she finally admitted who had died by Tris’ hand, a lot of pieces clicked into place. He understood now why Bea hadn’t quite been able to look Josie in the eye since she began talking about the dream. It was Will. Of course it was Will. If it hadn’t been Tobias, he didn’t think that Tris would have mourned the death of any particular Dauntless members like that of her friends. A lot of them would have been nameless faces in a sim-controlled crowd, and the other closest male friend Tris had was already dead. She wouldn’t have been as upset about Peter…maybe Uriah. But Will? He had been one of her best friends...the boyfriend of her best friend in the world. It was no small thing. A weighty sigh escaped his lips as Noah rubbed his hands over his face and closed his eyes, shaking his head softly. Will had been a good kid...sort of a know-it-all and not their absolute strongest initiate, but he had been Dauntless. He had been kind and smart as a whip. Tobias had liked him...in his own way, “I’m sorry, Bea.” He didn’t know what else to say that hadn’t already been said to try to make her feel better, but maybe there was nothing to make it better. Maybe it was just...acceptance of the fact that it happened and trying to move on. It was Noah's voice that broke through Josie's thoughts, detaching herself from the dreams, Christina, and the loss of Will and instead bringing her to the present. Her eyes focused as she looked at Bea, her heart immediately aching in a completely new way and for a completely new reason. She understood the feelings of hurt and even betrayal that the news seemed to manifest in the side of her mind that she couldn't help but think belonged to Christina, but she wasn't Christina, just like Bea wasn't Tris. And Bea was hurting. Stepping forward, Josie dropped into the chair next to Bea that she had been sitting in only moments ago, her long arms reaching out to wrap around her best friend. She pulled Bea in toward her, her embrace strong as she dipped her head to rest on her shoulder. Part of her wanted to assure her that it was okay, but it clearly wasn't. She wanted to tell her that everything would be fine, but she didn't know that for sure. So, instead she just blew out a long breath and murmured, "We're right here. We're not going anywhere." As Josie’s arms went around her, Bea lost what restraint she’d been maintaining and let herself be comforted even if the part of her that she knew was Tris didn’t think she had any right to accept it. The thing was, though, that Bea knew far better than Tris did what it was like to have no one but yourself to depend on. She knew far better than Tris did to have everything stripped away and have to find the strength to push through it alone, anyway. So it stood to reason that Bea knew far better than Tris, too, that having that sort of kindness, that sort of steadfast love from others was never something that ought to be declined. It was too rare, too needed, too precious. It had taken a lot for Bea to arrive at a place where she could even accept that kind of love from friends, from a family that she had chosen, or even that she had been born into, and she couldn’t let herself feel bad about taking comfort in accepting it now. “I’m so sorry,” she muttered, burying her face against Josie’s shoulder and wishing they could go back to fifteen minutes ago before Tris had once again intruded on her life. Except that she wasn’t entirely sure that she wanted to undo tonight. Ultimately, the weight of Tris’ choices felt less heavy now, even if her heart still ached in a way that she could neither ignore, nor really explain. Part of her understood, too, that she didn’t have to make the same choices as Tris. She could choose to share her burdens and, even though they’d still hurt, maybe they’d be more bearable. And maybe if she made different choices than Tris did, she could also minimize how much she hurt the people she loved. She couldn’t imagine what Josie was feeling right now, or what Christina would feel if she knew what had happened, but maybe it was better for both of them to know the truth, especially if it meant their best friend was better at being there for them. It wasn’t okay, but maybe it could be eventually. Lifting her head, Bea craned her neck to look at Noah before gesturing wordlessly for him to come back to her, too. For a few moments, Noah stood back and watched as Josie went forward to Bea and wrapped her up in her arms. It needed to be her, he thought. He very well could have done the same thing, but this grief - and that’s what it was - impacted Tris and Christina more than it impacted him and therefore it was Bea and Josie who most needed this moment. He was glad to understand...to know the truth of things, but he didn’t move until Bea looked up and met his gaze once more. He was moving even as she indicated he should join their huddle, the invitation taken before it was ever fully offered. Noah lowered himself to the balcony floor, but his height still made him more or less even with both girls. He didn’t know Josie overly well yet, but he did know Christina. As he hugged Bea, his arm encircling her waist, he put his other arm comfortingly around Josie’s back. He pressed a kiss to Bea’s temple and stayed close, hoping that they could help her bear some of the weight from this long-held secret, “It’s going to be all right, Bea. We’ve got you.” Perhaps it wasn’t completely fine now, but Noah had faith that it would be. The mistakes and tragedies of that life did not have to fully spill over into this one. As real as it felt, they had to draw lines somewhere. |