NOAH | EVE
First of all, your freckles are cute as hell and you can rock them all summer long. Secondly, whoever she wants you to meet is probably an asshole. Thirdly, you're the furthest from selfish. This is why I typically don't talk to her unless absolutely necessary. She doesn't know either one of us and she wants to play at being a mother when she hasn't given a shit pretty much since the beginning.
I told her I'm dating an 18 year old. Which is true, although Bea is mature enough that I typically don't even think about it until someone brings it up. She was shocked into being speechless for a whole 10 seconds, so I count that as a victory.