Re: second floor ; smoking
"You think better of people than I do," she said without shame. She wasn't a pessimist. She wanted to believe the best of people; she'd wanted that since she was a child. But time had taught her that more people turned a blind than otherwise. "I know everyone has potential, but many people can't summon it. If there's no one there to unearth it, and someone does monstrous things, then what good are those things beneath the surface? If someone's been so twisted by life that no one can reach that potential at all anymore, what of them?" She tilted her head in acquiescence. "But if the argument is that everyone begins with something innately good, then I can see your point. I agree with it. Monsters aren't born monsters," she said with empathy. "There are things I would rather not know. Aren't there things it would make you happier not to know? Who are we to decide what true happiness is? Are we happy?"
Secrets were a part of the trade. No one walked onto a set and created a starlet without secrets. The studio lied about her hair, calling her a towheaded child that had always been white blonde. Everything from there down to her shoes was one kind of lie or another. She was a secret in her chair, breathing the same air as him and pretending the reaper wasn't tapping her on the shoulder with his rawboned fingers. "I never say anything that anyone likes," she admitted of conversations had beyond this chair. "That doesn't keep me from saying things. Does it keep you from saying things?" asked him, her smile a cue that she already knew the response to her own question.
"Causes and people aren't the same. You can let family, lovers and friends come first, and that doesn't mean you have to give up your beliefs. It only means you need to consider the flesh and blood people closest to you as carefully as you consider missions. Do you think it's a competition?" she asked with sadness. "I was married at sixteen," she explained, though that only pertained to the girl in the chair, and not to anything beyond this ship. "It's lonely, bello, to lie down beside someone who has something in his life that he treasures more than you."
She recognized the sadness in his expression. She realized that he had known for longer than she had, but what point was there in discussing things that could not change? This was only meant to be an evening. It couldn't exist beyond that, which they both knew. She sat back in her chair with a heavy exhale of taint. "Now, bello, you will honor my request and go. Memories are better when they're beautiful." She pulled her hand from beneath his, and she held it out for him to kiss. "A domani," she added, knowing with perfect clarity that she would not be seeing him tomorrow.