mk robinson wants to be a star. (hitjackpot) wrote in doorslogs, @ 2012-08-24 04:25:00 |
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Entry tags: | flash thompson, mary jane watson |
WHO MK and Adam.
WHAT three little words.
WHEN tonight-ish?
WHERE the Mandarin Bar.
WARNING excessive amounts of cute. EXCESSIVE.
Las Vegas was a cheap destination for romance. Not in the literal sense since taking a woman out somewhere to impress her usually costed an entire month’s pay, but it always felt a little impersonal and disingenuous. Like all the fancy food, beautiful views and expensive hotel rooms were built to make up for something. They were for new couples who didn’t know each other that well and old couples who needed to rekindle something that wasn’t there anymore. Adam and Maddie K didn’t have that problem. The way he felt for her made him angry, sad and tired, but at the end of every day he just wanted to be with her. Maybe his old friend from Seattle would be easier, but being without Maddie K seemed impossible. He had fought so hard for her, asked so much when she should be out enjoying her life and despite that she stuck with him. For someone that barely understood adoration or affection, this meant everything to Adam. So, there wasn’t anything in Vegas that really matched how he felt about her. The more he thought about it, there wasn’t many cities that could do it. Everywhere seemed so busy, so intrusive when they were better isolated from everyone else. The only place that could really work in that sense was one of the only secret hideouts on the strip: The Mandarin Bar. It was the sort of place only locals and people who didn’t want to be seen knew about, but it had a beautiful view, dark corners to hide in and jazz music to dance to. He didn’t have the money to rent the place out and demand it to be empty save just them, but he thought going there late on a weekday would at least come close. Besides, if she wanted some millionaire, she wouldn’t be with a doctor at a free clinic. He arranged for her to be picked up in a town car and driven there without much hint as to where was. When she got there, he was waiting by one of the windows, hiding his nerves by focusing on the dotted lights across the horizon that eventually stopped short into the desert darkness. Adam was dressed in a black, thin suit that was surprisingly well tailored to his tall, lanky figure. His blonde hair that was usually a little messy and out of place was carefully combed back so he looked like some kind of old fashioned, stern aristocrat from a royal family. As he silently stood there, drink in hand, all the awkward nerdiness seemed to evaporate as if it were never there at all. Women, who normally wouldn’t give him the time of day, paused just long enough to talk themselves out of hitting on someone who clearly wasn’t interested in seeing to anyone except the woman he was waiting for. MK was unbelievably anxious about her date with Adam, and she knew exactly why. Her conversation with Wren over the forums had put plenty of things into perspective. She didn’t know if she was sure about Ainslie (okay, she definitely wasn’t sure about things with Ainslie) or what Adam felt about her, but she knew what she felt about him. It hadn’t been the consuming, overwhelming sort of thing that she associated with the mask she lost. An almost obsessive sort of love that carried over the years because of grief. No, her feelings for Adam sneaked up on her slowly and quietly, like a creeping fog up a riverbank. It was something she didn’t realize until attention was brought to it. Now, it was all she could think about, how she could actually be in love with him. It was completely frightening -- especially given all the outside shit that pressed their way into their relationship -- the idea of giving herself up to someone again. And so the nerves that were plaguing Adam also coursed through her as she prepared herself for the night. Wanting to completely impress him, she pulled out one of her favorite dresses, a fitted white dress with a v neckline and nude shoes, and she pulled her hair back in a neat updo. She only had one drink, a three-fingered glass of whiskey, just enough to sate the desire to drink and to quell the shiver down her spine. Okay, she could do this, right? She was MK goddamn Robinson, model and tabloid favorite. She had been through hell, and she could face Adam after everything that had happened. After tucking the pills that scattered across her bedside table away and using cover-up to rid herself of the few red marks on her arms, she stood in front of the mirror, where the locket her vigilante had given her all those years ago hung on the corner. She eyed the gold chain and then the open heart and reached her tiny fingers to brush her fingers against the surface of it. There he was, her first love, smiling up at her, and it was all she could do not to tear up there. But she held it in her hand for a moment before turning to tuck it away as well. She hadn’t worn it the last time she went to Adam’s, and she didn’t really feel the necessity to wear it on her every moment of every single day anymore. A few minutes later, she was on her way. The towncar earned a raised eyebrow, but she climbed in anyway, badgering the driver for any sort of information. He didn’t peep a word, however, and MK had no idea where he was actually driving her until they came to a stop outside of the Mandarin Bar. She smiled and she sighed because this was just what they needed: somewhere tucked away and without the noise or ostentatiousness of the Strip. Once inside, it took her more than a moment to find Adam. In his suit and slicked back hair, he was such a stark contrast to the usual gawky doctor in a labcoat, and it made her heart pitter-patter in her chest. She walked up with her usual hip sway and touched his arm lightly. “So, come here often?” she asked quietly, leaning in just enough for him to hear her. It occurred to Adam that the last time they were out in public together, they went from happy flirty couple to breaking up inside of an hour. Tonight, if he managed to miscommunicate his feelings or she desperately didn’t want to hear the truth, could go the same way. The thought of fighting with her played with his nerves. When they had an argument, it was never anything even remotely close to civil and usually left him feeling miserable and lonely long afterwards. Everything hinged on things running smoothly tonight and from the look she gave him, he could see she knew it, too. He turned towards her, arms wrapping around her tiny frame as if he hadn’t held her in a long time. It always felt that way when something bad happened between them. Adam managed a smile, eyes quickly checking for the heart necklace that her dead ex-lover gave her, his smile turning more honest and bright when he saw that it was missing. Throughout most of their relationship, he took the necklace as a symbol for something he could never be. He’d never come close to replacing the dead vigilante, his own best friend, and even just the memory of him would always beat the good doctor in the end. With it now gone, it changed things. He wasn’t blind enough to ignore that. “Standing here, thinking about how this place reminded me of the first time I really saw you.” Adam brushed a hand against her cheek delicately and kissed her. That party, despite how many lives it seemed to turn upside down, saved him. Adam’s brand of darkness came in a different flavor from Maddie K, but it didn’t stop them from understanding each other in a way that bound him to her. She did notice him eyeing her, but she didn’t think he would be searching for the almost omnipresent necklace. No, she just thought he was checking her out, and she smirked softly as she resisted the urge to ask him if he liked what he saw. Instead, she leaned into his embrace, hungry for his touch. She missed the days when they first began seeing each other when she could crawl into his arms for comfort without a second thought. Now, he had the vigilantes, and he had the clinic, and he had Ainslie. It felt like centuries since they had seen each other, when in reality it had been only a week or so. She still ached to be close to him, however, and leaned more into his arms as he leaned down to kiss her. “It feels like that was years ago, seriously,” MK said. The party at Passages had been only months prior, but that, too, felt like centuries. So much had happened in between, even if the images and the sensations of that night still burned in her memories. She stretched up to kiss him again, arms slinking up around his neck. “You look really, really handsome tonight, Adam. I’m impressed.” Adam gave the sort of smirk that usually accompanied solving a medical emergency or showing off one of his new vigilante-ready health kits. He was rarely confident about his appearance or social graces, but he knew he looked good in formal wear. It was just fact. “Told you I look good in a suit. Hard to believe with all the white lab coats and hoodies I wear otherwise.” He let his hands wander down to her waist, nearly being able to feel her skin through the tight little number she had on. “Despite that, you look much better. Surprised you weren’t mobbed by fans on the way in here. Worried I’d have to fight them off.” He joked, though that was exactly the reason why he picked a place like this. People didn’t come here to bother or be bothered. It was a different kind of living that Las Vegas wasn’t built for. He held her a moment longer and then stepped away just far enough to hold his hand out. “Like to dance? Can tell me everything I’ve missed this past month, or can just dance. Music is a bit old fashioned, but you don’t mind?” Adam’s confidence that shone only moments before was lost in that awkward need to make her happy. He had been so harsh with her lately, but his default mood was always gentle and eager to please. The confidence was new, something MK wasn’t privy too very often, but something she appreciated greatly when it did surface. “You did tell me,” she agreed with a smile, fingers trailing down his cheek for a moment. “But like you said, the hoodies and lab coats don’t help a lot.” His wandering hands earned him a warm smile and a quiet sigh. She missed this a lot. The touching, the closeness, the not arguing. “I’m gonna make you wear suits all the time, handsome. At least when we’re alone. I’m not sure I like all this attention you’re getting. Make a girl jealous, will you?” As much as she wanted to keep him there forever, she didn’t snatch him right back when he pulled away. With just a second’s hesitation and a face as if she was really considering dancing with him, she placed her hand lightly in his and said, “Dancing. Definitely.” No discussing things tonight. “You bring me to a place that plays this and you still don’t want me to call you dad? Huh.” It was a warm, light hearted tease. MK enjoyed jazz well enough, and she appreciated it even more now that she had Adam to dance with. “Little early in the evening to make me jump off the roof, don’t you think?” He took her hand anyway and lead her out to the dancefloor. Adam didn’t belong in the sort of clubs she liked to go to and if she had tried to take him there it would inevitably lead to him sitting alone in some barely quiet corner. Here, he could at least pretend like he belonged. Dressed the way he was, people probably thought he was some kind of money making business man that was too sophisticated for clubs and outrageous parties. It was a nice lie to cover up the awkward truth that he simply acted decades older than he was. He put one hand on her waist as the other grasped her hand at their side like a couple would in some retro era and lead her around the dance floor with that graceful precision he embodied. Nothing about him was ever messy, which likely explained why he was having such trouble being torn between two very vibrant women. Why he couldn’t find a way to help Maddie K with all the terrible things that were piled on her lately. MK never really frequented these quiet sort of clubs with lowlights and quiet music billowing through the air, finding herself more at home with strobe lights and a loud bass. It showed how different she and Adam could be, and they were very different on paper. The model and the good doctor. The party animal and the homebody. In theory, they shouldn’t work (and the constant fighting and problems might have been proof of that), but that was just what people on the outside saw. MK and Adam both knew what brought them together, and she knew how much she needed and wanted him in her life. At the end of the day, fuck the problems; Adam was more important to her. Which was why she was reacting the way she did about...well, everything. Though the horrible things she suffered through factored in, a lot of her freak outs as of late was because of fear. Fear of losing Adam, fear of being alone, fear of losing her mind, fear of giving herself over to someone like she did those years ago. As she let him lead the way, she looked up at him with a soft smile, but her eyes conveyed the storm of emotions. After a few quiet moments, she leaned up and pressed her lips gently against his. “I missed you,” she said earnestly, still smiling. Maddie K would be able to feel Adam relax after the kiss like she had personally taken a burden off his shoulders. He smiled down at her, forehead barely touching hers. “Missed you, too.” He closed his eyes, trying his best to forget about the vigilantes, the gossip blogs, the clinic and even the other redhead from Seattle. It was surprisingly easy in a place like this and with every sway to the music, he found a way to get lost in this little moment. “Have something to tell you.” His chest tightened and he stood up straight to look down at her. Adam tried not to look stern or worried, but a mix of it splashed across his face. “Don’t need a response, just wanted you to know. Think you should know, even if you don’t want to hear it.” He made an attempt to sound like what he was going to say was a good thing, but honestly he didn’t know if it was. MK liked that she could still make him relax, even after all the months, even after all the bullshit. It was times like that that she felt important to him. Like she actually mattered to him. She smiled up at him, too, unable to control the look of pure affection in her eyes. She didn’t want to either. When he brow creased and his lips frowned in worry, however, she raised an eyebrow, fighting the urge to look worried as well. “Oh, yeah?” she asked, voice spiking up with a crack of concern. She couldn’t imagine what he wanted to say that he didn’t want a response to, and one that he thought she might not want to hear. Her mind went to wildly different conclusions, all of them not particularly good. “Yes I-” Adam visibly gathered courage, inhaling as he closed his eyes and found some kind of resolve. There was no turning back now and if he missed his chance to tell her how he felt tonight, the moment might be gone for good. “Want you to know,” He opened his eyes, looking down at her, his worried expression turning into a barely there smile. “I love you. Know things have not been easy, know other people have guessed how I felt about you, but want to tell you officially. Want to remind you that I love you every time there’s doubt.” Adam stopped dancing, but kept his hold on her so they stayed close. “Don’t have to answer, just wanted you to know.” He nodded, sure of what he said as if he were making a diagnosis. “Never been in love before, but I know that I do love you.” “You love me?” If he hadn’t stopped dancing, MK would have stopped them both herself. Time itself seemed to stand still, as grossly cliche as that all was. She couldn’t help it, okay? As he looked down at her, her heart caught in her throat, and she had to bite down on her lip to stop the emotional wibble. “Adam,” she said breathlessly, searching his face for some sort of indication that this wasn’t real. That he was just saying it to hush her panic over the other redhead in their lives. But it wasn’t there, and in that moment, she knew that everyone had been right, at least a little. Wren and Ainslie and anyone else who told her that he loved her, they were right. It gave her the resolve to look up at her with a soft smile and all the earnesty in the world. “I love you, too, Adam. I love you so much.” So much it scared her to her bones. “I know you don’t think-- Or that-- I just love you, Adam. Believe it.” Adam wasn’t expecting a response, or at least, he wasn’t expecting that. Since they broke up at the party, he saw this as a one sided relationship that was bound to tip out of balance eventually. Since then he had convinced himself that she couldn’t feel anything more than affection for him and perhaps that friendly kind of concern he was so used to. There was no getting past that mask in Seattle, past a man who was everything Adam couldn’t be. But, part of him knew that was just pessimistic thinking. Things would be a lot easier if she rejected him. He could go right back to his work and flirt with Ainslie without having to care and worry for someone that really needed him around. Life was harder this way, with her returning his love, but it was what he wanted. It was what he was asking for, even if he’d never admit that. He opened his mouth to try and fight her on it, to ask her to reconsider, but he couldn’t. The inside of his ribcage boiled, preventing him from doing anything but smile back at her. The surprise on his face turned into relief, happiness. “You do.” He confirmed, pulling her into a hug as he buried his face into the crook of her neck. Adam held her for a second and then said softly, “Should move in with me. Worked well enough with other people around. Will be better if it were just us.” MK knew he was convinced before that she couldn’t love him, couldn’t return his affections. That their dead mask still chained her heart to him. And she would be lying if she denied that he would always keep a tiny part of her. Adam once said first loves were complicated, and MK knew it was true, especially when that person was snatched out of her grip so mercilessly. But she knew she was in love with Adam, too. She just knew it, even if Wren didn’t quite believe that he deserved her. That didn’t matter; all that did was that he felt that way and that she did, too. It would be difficult, god knew that, but everything else would fall into place. MK had to believe that. She nodded as extra confirmation before she embraced him just as happily, fingers digging into him and smiling against his shoulder. It was the most wonderful feeling she’d had in some time, just standing there, just the two of them. She inhaled his cologne and listened to him speak, but stayed quiet for a moment and in the embrace. Living with Adam would change things completely. She’d have to be more careful about certain things, but she could do it. She could keep the pills and the booze and the DVDs and still ensure his happiness, too. Pulling back, she gave him a long look. “You sure?” She smiled widely then, tongue sneaking out between her teeth. “Sure you’re ready to see all my gross habits and stuff?” Adam, of course, had different intentions for them to live together. Besides simply being able to see her on a daily basis instead of when they could make time between their different worlds, he could keep an eye on the drinking and recovery. After the loss of their mask, Adam had nearly let himself die on whatever different drug he could get into his system. It took the appearance of Pym, another addict, to put a stop to that right away. A lot more was at stake than just his own life if Pym was hopped up on a drug that could convince him to destroy New York or his old teammates. Adam had hoped that MK would get clean along with him, but she had a reputation to keep up and no amount of attention could stop the pain Alex had caused. But, he was sure that he could fix this. If they were really in love, it could keep them from destroying themselves, right? “I’m a doctor. Have seen things far beyond what you and your gross habits are capable of.” Adam touched the side of her face, cupping her cheek with his long fingers. “Don’t have to. Just thought- might be good for us. Nice to see you every day. Maybe even sleep at the same time.” Maybe it was a bit of the blind leading the blind, expecting that Adam could fix her. She felt beyond repair, completely shattered, but she could fake it for Adam. He deserved someone who loved him and was completely and totally whole. She did love him, of course; she wasn’t lying about that. But being able to piece together the tiny shards left in the wake of Alexander? That seemed near impossible. MK would try though, try for Adam, and that was what had her nodding with an enormous grin spreading across her red-stained lips. Throwing her arms around his neck, she pulled him close and stole a few kisses before he could protest. “Yes, no. It would be good for us. Yes, yes, yes.” Her fingers cupped his cheek again, and she looked up at him with that unadulterated adoration that kept sneaking into her eyes the past few months. They stood in the middle of the dancefloor, heads close together like they were conspiring against everyone else in the club. The rest of the night would be easy, they could find a nice corner to sit in and talk about everything else except them. They didn’t even have to talk, a couple drinks to make the edges around the night fuzzy would be enough to bring some kind of calm to his otherwise stressful and worrisome little world. It would be like how it always felt around her, but now it had something more. It was that look in her eyes that he had purposely ignored before, that strange eagerness to spend time together. “Settled, then. Will worry about the logistics of moving you in tomorrow. For now, enjoy the night.” He took her hand again and stepped in time with the music to get them dancing again. |