It's been different ever since he came back. You try not to think about it, try to enjoy the time you have, but it isn't enough. It's not the same. What happened to him, you wonder, but you'll never know the answer because you're too afraid to ask the question. Still, you wait for the other shoe to drop because you know it's coming whether you want it to or not. It's just a matter of when. And then the day comes and you know deep down that it's The Day before you even get out of bed. At first, you tear the house apart looking for another note. You pour through every vehicle of communication you can find that you shared, but there's nothing. Anger sets in next and you snap at everyone that tries to talk to you.
You go out back and he follows silently because he knows you need to work it out somehow. No words can describe how you're feeling so you don't speak. You fear that your voice will crack, that tears will fall and you'll be utterly broken if you try. Words wont come for days, not to anyone, but right now, all you can focus on is finding a release for your anger. He left. He abandoned you. How could he leave? Now you wish with all your heart that you'd asked what was wrong. You wish he could trust you with whatever was going on, but no. He'd left you out of the loop and that was as much a betrayal as leaving was.
The tears came that night, when you slipped out of your bed and padded down the hall and into his. You missed him. You cried and cried and cried yourself to sleep because you just wanted him back. He'd ignored your texts, calls, Facebook messages and posts. He was ignoring you for the first time in your life and you couldn't understand why. The question will plague you for the rest of your life or until he comes back. You want him to come back but you don't think he will.