Alicia.
I'm not trying to fuck with your head. I've never wanted to fuck with your head or do shit to you, even if that's how it ended up. And I'm sorry for that even if that will never make up for it.
I don't actually know how to bring this up without you accusing me of trying to manipulate you which is why I'm trying to give you the option in private. But it's still there even if it looks like total shit.