Fred Weasley. (pranking) wrote in disorderic, @ 2017-11-26 15:33:00 |
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Fred was not easily embarrassed, but that did not mean that he was excited for the idea to have his less-than-technologically-savvy father join Hooter or Wiztagram. But if Arthur was going to insist on having it then Fred was going to make the most of the opportunity in front of him. “Do you want to start with Hooter or Wiztagram?” he asked, holding out his hand for his dad’s phone. “Do you even know what the difference between them is?” Arthur pretended to look mildly offended, “Of course I know the difference.” He paused to think about if he actually did. “Hooter is the one with more text only posts and wiztagram has pictures.” He refrained from adding the ahead of either of the application since Bill had advised him otherwise. He looked at Fred as if to say, aren’t I impressive. “Right,” Fred was feeling kind enough not to tell his father he was wrong just to confuse him. “But sometimes people hoot photos or post photos of text on wiztagram,” he added instead. “Which one do you want to start with?” “What do you suggest?” Arthur looked to his son for his opinion. “Maybe Hooter?” Considering it would be nice to actually read what the Order was hooting. He adjusted his glasses as he handed over his phone and started to peer over his son’s shoulder to see what he was doing. Fred nodded in agreement and opened up hooter to start registering his dad’s account. “Yeah I can think of some good accounts for you to follow on hooter, there's this one called @roguemomstaffer that's always interesting.” With all the personal details required entered (including the password, which Fred noted for future use) Fred turned his head to look at his dad. “Okay, handle and bio. You could be something like @arthuritis.” “Oh yes, I have heard some talk of that. I wonder who it is.” Arthur wondered who was ballsy enough to speak out like it was needed. His musing stopped when he heard the word handle? What the bloody heck was that? How had they got to this point? He had completely missed all the steps. He was back to looking at the screen and then to his son. He was smart enough to figure out the handle was his name, putting two and two together. “You think you’re funny do you? Old man jokes.” He tsked, “I would have thought you better than that.” He shook his head. “I’m not that old.” “Yeah, who knows,” Fred replied with a smirk, still tapping away at Arthur’s phone. “Okay, how about -- whoops just registered arthuritis for you, sorry dad, guess you'll just have to face your age now.” Arthur looked at Fred with a displeased look. “I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you with this task.” He couldn’t help a smirk from sneaking onto his face for just a moment. “When Bill asks why I have this username, I shall direct him to you.” He looked at the phone again, “Now continue what do I do, exactly?” “Now you need a bio. Something like ‘Father of 7, including a flying car’ and everyone will wonder which kid you forgot.” Except that was pretty obviously Percy. “Or ‘That one with the red hair’. Or just a string of confusing emojis that people try to make meaning of.” “Perhaps not best to advertise my involvement in creating of a flying car, I like to think they have forgotten.” Arthur made an oops face and shrugged. “What string of confusing emojis would you suggest? Oh, you just decide and I’m sure I’ll rue the day I let you do this.” “If you insist,” Fred grinned, randomly choosing emojis but making sure to include favourites like eggplants and peaches. “There, done. And now you just start hooting. What do you want your first message to be?” “Do I even want to know what the emojis mean?” Arthur asked and as he asked the question he realized he would probably rather not know. Arthur looked at Fred as if amazed his son just knew how to do all this. “What is a good first hoot?” “I think a good first hoot would be insulting your workplace, but if you don’t want to get fired or something you could go with something more like ‘first hoot. no followers. Doing hooter right. #hashtag’ or ‘Popping my hooter cherry emoji. Be gentle with me’. Or mock the death eaters with a simple ‘Still alive and now on hooter’,” Fred spitballed. “I’d rather keep my job,” Arthur said though not entirely convincing. Who really wanted to work for the Ministry when it was run by death eaters. “I kind of like the sound of ‘Still alive and now on hooter’,” Arthur said with a nod. “Done,” Fred replied, tweeting that out, with a #hashtag to make his dad look more hooter incompetent. “Now I’ll hoot and tell people to follow you while you go find embarrassing baby pictures of everyone else to start your wiztagram.” Arthur raised an eyebrow. “Is this why you agreed to help me with this? So you could put embarrassing baby pictures of everyone out for the world to see?” He moved to stand. Just because he understood his son’s motive didn’t mean he wasn’t gonna do it. “No, dad, it’s because I’m your favourite, most helpful son who never has ulterior motives for anything. You’re getting me mixed up with George again.” “Sure, yeah, George is the only mischievous one. You just get dragged along for the ride,” he spoke from the bookshelf where he was pulling out photo albums. He came back with two albums and started flipping through. “With apps like these I don’t have to wait to embarrass with this photos only when you bring your significant others over.” Fred moved so he could look over his father’s shoulders at the photos. “Bill’s birthday is coming up, make sure you have a really embarrassing one to post for that.” “Oh you’re right! You know they will blame you for this,” he said with a chuckle. “How about this one?” He found one of Ron with his face covered in cake, with the one of the twins looking like they weren’t the one responsible for the state of Ron. Fred laughed. “He ate all the cake off his face and clothes though,” he recalled. “And then got a second piece because his first had been ‘ruined’.” Arthur laughed at the memory, “Yeah I think you’re right about that.” He smiled looking down at the picture. “You can’t blame him though, mum’s cakes are really good.” “Wouldn’t know, Ronniekins always hogs them,” Fred joked. “Now, just take a photo of that photo and then if you want to look artistic you can add a filter or whatever, and then choose a caption, add your hashtags, tag Ron so he sees it no matter where he is right now, and post.” “Okay, you say this all as if I know what I am doing.” Arthur at least started with taking a picture of the pictures, since he knew how that part of his phone worked. “I hope Ron appreciates it.” He wondered how the lad was doing. “Ron’ll like the reminder that we’re thinking of him even though he's not here,” Fred replied, serious for a second. “You should caption it with something about how even this look is better than his spattergroit look so we don't blow his cover.” “Good idea, and encourages the idea he is still here.” Arthur tried to move through the motions of what he was supposed to do. “So these filters, what is the best choice?” He kept flipping through the options not sure which one was appropriate or if any where. Not really caring about filters, Fred just shrugged. “That one,” he said decisively as Arthur clicked one, despite thinking it looked barely different than the others. “Really brings out the red hair.” “Well, that is important,” Arthur said not really sure he was gathering the importance of how this was working. He moved onto the next step and filled in the caption. “Now, how do I tag your brother?” Not the most patient person, Fred took the phone out of Arthur’s hands and quickly tagged Ron for him. “Just like that,” he added as an afterthought, as though that had been a demonstration. “Right…” Arthur said unsure how that had even happened. “I’m sure I’ll be able to do that again.” He took his phone back and looked at the posted results. “Thank you for the help.” “Anytime. Just remember I’m the best son when you get to posting embarrassing pictures of me.” “Ah right, the best son who has left me with the handle Arthuritis.” |