lakshmi patil (patill) wrote in disorderic, @ 2018-03-20 00:05:00 |
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It was five after eight in the evening when Lakshmi, fashionably late by a few minutes completely on purpose, knocked lightly on John Dawlish’s door. She’d ended up choosing to dress casually -- new blue denim jeans and lighter purple top -- since despite any light-hearted, cheerful flirting that may have gone on while lamenting the world, this meeting was precisely that: dealing with what was going on. Something had happened to one of John’s co-workers, and it was rattling enough, even if John himself didn’t want to say it, that he’d called in the raincheque she’d promised just yesterday. Things were awful, and she knew it had to be even worse for those in the DMLE like John, Jasper, Maddie, Ali, and Chelsea, or even Lumos off in the Obliviator office headed by a Lestrange. So, she was here to do her part, to drink in commiseration with a long term friend and former classmate. Despite having an already clean flat, John scrubbed around the house to make sure not even a speck of dust was present as he had company for the evening. His flat looked as though no one was actually inhabiting it, but John needed to focus his energy on something when he couldn’t sleep through the hours of the night. He opened the door after a few minutes of shuffling around, and greeted Lakshmi with a small smile. “You’re late, Patil,” he said, stepping aside to let her through the door. Once she was inside, John closed the door behind her, and lead the way to the kitchen. “I was too lazy to make healthy food, so I have pizza if you want a slice.” Lakshmi flashed a little smile at the greeting, and entered the flat properly before taking off her shoes on the mat to avoid getting dirt inside John’s impeccably cleaned abode. “‘Late’ starts happening at fifteen past the agreed upon time,” she teased by way of explanation without giving him the answer that she’d done it on purpose. “I can do with a slice — I had tea already, I wasn’t sure I should be drinking on an empty stomach, but how can I say no to something unhealthy?” Try as she might to be ‘good’, she certainly loved comfort food. “Is tea really the best choice before drinking?” John wondered out loud, though he was not expecting an honest answer to come from it. He hadn’t ever truly wondered if that would make a difference, and he had always assumed it would be fatty foods that helped. But regardless, he gestured towards the pizza box -- almost three-quarters of the pie remained untouched, and John was sure he’d be eating the rest at random bouts throughout the week. He stopped in front of the liquour cabinet, and opened the cabinet door. Though not large by any means, he had a decent enough collection for a bachelor and John pointed at it. “Pick your poison, then. I’m having whiskey neat myself.” “Not a clue,” answered Lakshmi as she sidled up to the pizza box before pausing, and then finally asking, “Which cupboard are the plates in?” Because she certainly wasn’t going to risk getting anything on any of John’s furniture. “I believe tonight is telling me that rum is the choice this evening.” “Oh,” John chuckled, clearly amused at himself for being so forgetful that he had forgotten to take out the plates. “Here,” he replied, walking to the cabinet next to the stove and taking out two plates and two glasses. He handed one plate to Lakshmi, and took the glasses back to where he had been standing, setting them down on the counter. Carefully taking the whiskey and the rum bottles from the cabinet, he poured the whiskey for himself before turning to Lakshmi. “On the rocks or neat?” “Thank you,” Lakshmi replied politely, manners still present in spite of the fact they’d known each other since they were eleven and had far less of them at the time. She scooped a smaller slice from the box, set it on the plate before looking back up at her host. “Did you want another slice to go with your whisky? Oh, and on the rocks, please.” John nodded, grabbed some ice and followed her request, as he handed the drink to her. “Nah, I’ll pass on another slice for now,” he responded, knowing full well that he’d be diving for that pizza at a later time. John sipped his whiskey, enjoying the burn down his throat, even though he had been having at least a few drinks every night now for the past -- whatever it was. He was frowning, without actually realising it, and made a half a disgruntled noise, shaking his head and clearing his throat. “Jess said she would host a dinner party and that I’m to be seated between you and Lumos.” He sniggered momentarily and cast Lakshmi a curious glance. “Apparently you two can put a genuine smile on my face.” Lakshmi accepted the glass with another little smile in lieu of a spoken thanks, and immediately brought it to her lips for a little sample. It was strong, of course, but she only wrinkled her nose out of reflex — the alcohol was the quality she expected from John. “What, really?” Lakshmi’s eyebrows had raised in surprise rather than genuine questioning while she lowered the glass. Pizza was forgotten at that pronouncement. “Well! I do like putting a smile on your grumpy face, not that there isn’t reason for it.” The world was unforgiving. “Do you agree with her assessment?” “I opted for Gwenog Jones myself…,” John trailed off, offering a quick shrug. He downed a bigger portion of the whiskey and reacted accordingly, clearing his throat after a moment. “Turns out Gwenog might not be there on the account of not being a close personal friend of Jess’s, so I’ll have to settle for this combination.” As a gesture of affection, John reached his free arm to Lakshmi’s hair and gently tussled it about, grinning stupidly. Clicking her tongue in warning at the mention that Gwenog Jones would have been preferred to her own company, although she was still plainly amused. “I tell you, Jess needs to expand her friendship circle for your sake,” she settled on, snickering a little at the thought. A little shiver went up Lakshmi’s spine as John’s fingers touched across her hair despite herself, and then she was prodding him equally goodnaturedly in the chest with her own finger, which she let linger for longer than she needed to. “Personally, I feel I’m leagues ahead of Gwenog, but I may lose my humility if I carry on.” “To be fair,” he started once again, unknowingly brushing off a few loose strands of her hair away from her face. “It’s hard for anyone to be comparable to Gwenog. She is on a league of her own.” John let his fingers linger over her cheeks for a moment, before realising what he was doing. He immediately dropped his hand, and offered her a quick, apologetic smile. “Besides, I don’t see you as the type of person who compares yourself with others. You’re way too good for that.” The Ravenclaw alumna could feel the slight heat in her cheeks at the movement, and when John pulled away she too retracted her hand, and then brought the glass in her free hand to her lips taking a much longer sip this time. She then cleared her throat, and leaned on the counter casually. Mostly, she just blamed John Dawlish for being stupidly good looking. “I forgot I was speaking to a Harpies fan,” Lakshmi answered with a knowing look, pushing past the moment that, isolated, didn’t mean much of anything. “Well! I don’t know if that’s true, and I have my moments, but you know what, John? I will happily take your word for it.” “It’s all part of my two-page essay, so congratulations on getting all your free previews,” John retorted, throwing her the best flirty smile he could muster in that moment. Despite knowing Lakshmi for so long, and despite having flirted with her many, many times over those years, it still felt good to go back to that banter. It was some semblance of normalcy, and he felt a slight kick once he fell in that line. Nothing was normal. Families were broken and hurt. He shouldn’t get to feel normal, no. His smile retreated, and he was reaching for the bottle, ready to pour himself another round. It didn’t help that Lakshmi felt similarly. Everything was broken and shattering further, and she’d learned her lesson earlier on about trying to have nice things and expecting them to be normal. She wouldn’t allow herself to ruin anything, but on the hand that didn’t mean she didn’t want to stand here and flirt with John Dawlish, or to have him play with her hair, or run his fingertips across her cheek— “I don’t warrant hearing you give a dramatic reading this evening?” Lakshmi asked, smiling as if the moment didn’t happen before taking another sip and trying to keep the mood up noticing John’s faltering mood. Stupid of her, really, to get caught up in that moment — John had asked her here for a reason. Her eyes flicked to the bottle, and then back up to John. “Sorry, I know it’s difficult to be light-hearted at times.” And she did, definitely. Giving John a brief sympathetic look before asking, “We can talk about that, if you want. What happened today.” Reality had a way of sobering the mood even with them drinking straight hard liquor. John shook his head, hanging his head momentarily. “I wasn’t even meant to share what I shared with you. I was asked to keep our discussion between the person affected and myself, and I -- didn’t,” he admitted, feeling ashamed. “Well, rather, she told me after I had told you but nevertheless.” John frowned, as he watched the liquid flow from the bottle and to his glass. There was something mesmerising about that. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I asked to cash in on that raincheque if I was just going to miserable at you for no real reason -- nothing happened to me, personally.” Another bout of guilt set in as his thoughts fluttered over his last conversation with his mother and stepfather. John downed the drink in one gulp, setting the glass down with a loud thud. “The secret is safe — no one is going to say anything,” Lakshmi soothed, tone taking on a more calming effect as she reached out to put her hand on John’s forearm. Except the guilt flashed in herself, too, since she’d already mentioned the attack to Lumos without specifics. And she wasn’t even honest about the fact, but after seeing the reaction she scarcely wanted to load more onto John. “You’re allowed to talk about what you find difficult, too,” she pressed, giving his wrist a gentle squeeze before pulling her hand away. “It wasn’t gossiping.” Finishing her own drink, Lakshmi set her glass down next to John’s knowing she’d refill it shortly. “John,” she said simply, trying to gain his attention. Worried, she continued: “I didn’t come here so you could make me happy. I came because it’s a difficult time for all of us — for you, too, and we should support each other, right?” “Right.” It wasn’t supposed to be a grim thought, but John’s mind had made it as such. Several dark thoughts ran through his mind, and he scowled, refilling their glasses wordlessly. He remained lost in the entirely preposterous ramblings in his head and sighed loudly after some time, glancing at Lakshmi. “How do you stay so positive, then?” Mentally, Lakshmi wasn’t sure she answer that question earnestly. It wouldn’t help the mood at all when John needed something positive, but honesty was important here. Mouthing ‘thanks’ in silence, Lakshmi took another sip from the refilled glass. “Well,” she said slowly. “I’m not really that positive, if you can believe it.” A sadder smile flashed across her features before disappearing altogether. “I just — I suppose it’s the least I can do, to try and be there, because I can’t do anything else. I’m not an Auror, I’m not an Obliviator, I’m someone who works in the Floo office while my nieces are dealing with Death Eaters.” She hadn’t consciously thought of trying to stay positive as something to do, it was something she’d slipped into trying to help those going through worse than her. “If I can try to cheer someone else up or help shoulder their burden then I’ve done something.” And not be another pureblood that didn’t have to go through as much as everyone else. The guilt there was as strong as ever. John instinctively let his hand wrap around her shoulder, his fingers giving her shoulder a gentle, albeit firm squeeze. His other hand eyed the whiskey as though the liquid held all the answers in the world, but he listened to Lakshmi speak and shook his head. “The good thing about the Death Eaters is that they don’t discriminate based on jobs,” he snorted, only half-joking. It pained him to say a ‘good thing’ when it came to that bigoted group, but that was a different matter. “You’re not less important because you work in the Floo office,” John reassured her, the pitch of his voice lowering. “You’re also not responsible for shouldering anyone else’s burden.” It was easy to fall into that squeeze while she took another sip, Lakshmi knew, but she kept herself from sliding up closer. Despite earlier, it didn’t feel precisely right. “No, they’re fairly equal opportunity,” Lakshmi lamented, at least when it came to jobs. “And maybe I’m not, but when I see how much some of you are hurting, or how much you’re holding onto, of course I want to help shoulder it, so I’m going to.” She gave him a melancholic, but still slightly mirthful look. “Or sometimes I’ll settle for extracting a smile.” John drew in a long breath, and finally forced himself to smile, even if he wasn’t particularly feeling it. “Well, you’re no Gwenog Jones, but how’s that?” he asked, trying to get a smile out of her now, too. It was impossible not to smile. Lakshmi felt her lips would have moved on their own even if she didn’t consciously help them along. It was earnest and easy. “Am I really second fiddle to Gwenog if I’m the one getting it right now?” John let his hand slide up from her shoulder to Lakshmi’s face, and he poked her cheek with one finger as his smile grew wider. It was easy to forget about heavier things when things seemed playful like this and as long as John kept other thoughts at bay, perhaps he could give himself a few seconds to be human. “To be fair, she isn’t here right now, is she?” he asked, poking her cheek once again. “Yes, she’s not getting poked right now!” Lakshmi exclaimed, voice rising a touch in the typical way she got excited about any number of things, all in good natured fun. “I suppose I’d forgive you if you just admit I’m superior.” John stifled his laughter at her exclamation, if only because being the typical man that he was, his first thought was all about how he’d love to have been poking Gwenog Jones, but he refrained from making his thought into a vocal comment. Instead, he was amused at Lakshmi actually getting excited, though he wasn’t sure if she was simply getting excited because of the alcohol seeping in her system already. “You’re definitely superior in that you have all the rules and regulations down for the Floo Network, Lakshmi,” John retorted, a serious nod following. “Well done.” Clicking her tongue, Lakshmi swatted John in the arm for that comment. “Yes, thank you, I do!” It was a combination — John was correct in that she’d been drinking rum quite quickly, but it was also Lakshmi’s normal state of affairs when having a good time. “I suppose I’ll take what I can get.” “And you’ll get what you can take,” he was quick to respond, sliding the newly refilled glass of rum to her. “Here’s to me meeting Gwenog Jones this year and you being superior than her in person to her! Bottoms up!” He clinked their glasses together and downed the liquid in a single gulp. Maybe, just maybe, he would regret his decisions to drink more than he was used to on a Monday night. |