InsaneJournal

Who: Hank and Josh
What: chatting after a study session
Where: Hank's office
When: backdated to Tuesday
Rating: Gish (unless non-explicit talk of gross diseases rates higher)
Status: complete




"Fortunately, we've seen remarkably few of these types of infections," Hank rumbled as he pushed his glasses up his nose and flipped the book they'd been studying from shut. Though, sadly, he had no doubt that they had taken firm hold and accounted for no few casualties in many other parts of what was left of the world. He wondered, sometimes, just how many fatalities could be blamed directly on the virus itself versus all the varied horrors that went hand in hand with the collapse of civilization.

"Cholera, of course, is always one of the great threats where humans are forced to live with inadequate sanitation in the wake of disaster. A hardship we are inordinately fortunate not to have to cope with."

Josh nodded as he looked over his notes. There were definitely things he knew he couldn't fix. Maybe one or two instances of cholera. Maybe gangrene in a few people, though it would be easier to catch an infection before it started to rot. "Things like that spread quickly, don't they?"

"Unfortunately, yes,” Hank answered. “The symptoms of cholera, especially, lend themselves to the rapid spread of the disease and once an outbreak has begun it can be very difficult to get it under control again. Especially as the initial outbreak is generally due to a failure of the very infrastructure that would then be essential for its control."

Josh shook his head and sat back. "It's..." he frowned, reluctant to admit to anything like weakness. "It's a lot to take in," he said finally, able to blame it on them material.

"It is indeed, Mr. Foley. It is indeed," Hank agreed, settling a massive blue hand on Josh's shoulder for a moment. "You're picking it up remarkably quickly, however. And while I'm sure the unique perspective your powers give you on the matter must take some of the credit it is certainly not entirely responsible."

Josh smiled, pleased at the compliment even if he wasn't sure just how accurate it was. "I am working hard," he told Hank. "I can tell a lot by touching someone and letting my powers work, but sometimes I don't know why something feels like it does."

"And that would be why we engage in these very stimulating study sessions!" Hank assured him cheerfully. "You have already mastered curing the common cold, something that has eluded the greatest of medical minds through the ages, the rest will come in time."

Josh ducked his head. The cold thing had been a long shot. He'd had no clue if he could actually do it, but so long as he had a few minutes to track it down, he'd had good success. "Well, I'm glad you're here to help me with this. I'd hate to have to muddle my way through with anatomy books and hope."

"You could do it that way if you had to, but I'm more than happy to be of aid to you." Hank bent down, folding his massive body almost humorously in half as he pulled out his bottom desk drawer and extracted a pair of Twinkies. "I believe a snack is in order to refresh our brain power." He grinned, sharp canines showing, and offered one to Josh.

Josh took one and smiled at Hank. He'd started off not quite sure how to act around him, but it was impossible not to like him after working so closely and sharing his Twinkies. "Thank you."

"You are most welcome, Joshua." Hank kicked back in his chair, bare feet coming up to grip the edge of his desk and balance him as he leaned. It was a relatively rare break, but for the moment he wasn't going to rush back to his research. He had analyses running on his computer and the centrifuge was spinning in the background. He could take a few minutes. "Do you think you'd recognize cholera now, or the early stages of gangrene if you encountered them?" He didn't see anything at all wrong with discussing disease while eating.

Josh carefully broke his Twinkie open down the center, lengthwise and contemplated it. "I think so. Gangrene, definitely. Cholera I'd have to pay more attention to the collection of symptoms and how the whole system inside is being affected."

"I'm sure you could deal with it symptom by symptom if you had to, but I believe it's likely that being able to identify the underlying cause will allow you to treat it with less expenditure of energy." Which would mean, potentially, more lives saved.

Josh nodded. "That's what I'm hoping. I don't want to burn myself out helping one person when I could help so many more. I just need to know enough to deal with things the simplest way possible. Use finesse instead of brute force, you know?" Because while he could simply flood someone else with his power and clear out their whole system, why do that and put himself in a coma when all they had was an ear infection, or a tiny tumor?

"Excellent." Hank took an incongruously dainty bite of his Twinkie, nipping just a small piece off. Twinkies were, after all, despite their rather impressive shelf life, a finite resource and he intended to savor every last bite remaining to him. "That, my young friend, is well over half the battle. Simply knowing when you need to pull a scalpel out of your bag, or perhaps simply a syringe, rather than a bone saw. And, of course, there will be times when the best use of your powers is not to use them at all, and simply allow something innocuous to heal naturally rather than waste energy that might be needed elsewhere."

"It feels wrong," Josh murmured as he examined the Twinkie and broke it down further. "You know, when I touch someone and there's something wrong, I can feel it. It feels wrong. It's hard just letting something go."

"I understand that it must be difficult, to feel something like that and not to fix it, but-" He sighed and took another, only very slightly larger, bite of his Twinkie before continuing, smiling reassuringly at Josh. "Your abilities are a very valuable and finite resource, and the human body is very miraculous and adaptive. It is all right for you to simply allow it to do it's own work sometimes."

"I know," Josh said, finishing the deconstruction of the Twinkie into bite-size pieces. He popped one in his mouth and chewed, then sighed. "I will get used to it. I just need to deal with it a few times and get used to how it feels. Used to knowing what I can leave and what I can fix."

Hank nodded. "Perfectly understandable. It's all part of the learning process, and while I doubt it will ever stop feeling wrong to leave something you could fix, I am sure it will become easier with time. And, of course." Hank grinned broadly and took another bite of Twinkie. "I'm equally sure that with time your limits will change quite drastically and there will be less and less that you need to leave undone."

Josh ate another piece of his Twinkie, then another, before responding. "Do you really think so?" he asked Hank, not looking at him directly. "Will I get stronger like that?"

Hank considered for a moment. While he had a definite opinion on the subject he felt that it still deserved his full attention and consideration. "Admittedly, some powers do not change or grow over time," he began. "Yours, however...you have become stronger in just the last two years and I have very little doubt that will continue to be the case for at least some time."

Josh squished two pieces of Twinkie back together. If what Hank was saying was true, then maybe some day he'd figure out why he couldn't touch the virus that had turned the world to chaos. But for now he still had to be careful repairing too many injuries in a day. "I guess I'd better keep my powers exercised then, right?"

"Indeed. Using them is important, as is stretching them." He tipped back slightly in his chair again, expression going just the slightest bit vague in a way that was generally a sure sign he was dredging up some relevant - or perhaps not so relevant - quotation. "Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them. Einstein," he added somewhat absently, in case Josh was interested.

It was an interesting choice of quotation. Josh considered it as he ate more of the Twinkie. "I think... I mean, I have to accept my limits or I'll end up killing myself, or at least putting myself in a coma," he pointed out. Even though he knew it was one thing to grudgingly accept that he had limits and another to freely accept what they were and work within them.

"Exactly so," Hank agreed. "You must know and accept your current limits, it's essential for your own well being. But once you have done so then you may, safely and carefully, push them."

Josh thought it over, clearly debating something internally while he poked at his Twinkie bites. But he did this, thinking it all through before continuing. It was a conscious effort to be as unlike his family as possible. Thinking things through meant you didn't just react. And right now he wanted to react by just nodding and agreeing and hoping Hank thought he was totally capable of handling the pushing of boundaries and limits on his own. But thinking it through, he knew he wasn't. Once he started in on a patient, that was his focus. He needed help.

"Will you keep an eye on me?" he asked Hank after a minute or two. "Remind me if I push too fast?"

Hank waited and watched patiently as Josh visibly took a long moment to consider something. He was in absolutely no hurry for the moment, content to focus on Josh and his needs, though he had more than enough work waiting for him when he went back to it. He simply continued to work his way through his Twinkie, savoring each bite. When Josh finally spoke he nodded solemnly. He was more than cognizant of the fact that Josh needed help in accepting his limits once a patient was under his hands, hearing the boy admit that he realized it as well was an important step. Both in that he'd admitted it to himself and to someone else. "

For as long as you require the assistance," he agreed, smiling warmly. "And thank you. For your trust."

Josh smiled faintly and nodded to Hank. "Thanks. I know you won't say anything to anyone else. It's not like it means I'm not good at what I do. I just. I know if I wear myself out that'll cause problems. Lots of problems. So I need to learn how not to do that."

Hank actually went solemnly through the motions of miming zipping his lips. "You are exceptionally accomplished at what you do," Hank confirmed, smiling again. "And it is at least as important that you will hurt yourself if you over-extend as it is that you could cause problems, as you put it. You are a human being, after all, not simply a resource."

Sometimes Josh thought it would be easier if he was just a resource, but no. He still had a life to live. He couldn't spend every waking moment healing people. "I don't want people to think I'm unreliable," he added. "Then they won't trust that I can help them. And they have to trust me or they won't come to me."

"I believe there is very little threat that any of our number would doubt your reliability, Joshua. You have proven it too many times over the last two years," Hank assured him mildly. "And to know that you are still learning your limits and how to work within them would be highly unlikely to change that...but that does not mean there is any reason the information need go beyond the two of us." He was perfectly willing to hold it in confidence while he helped Josh continue to learn and grow in his powers.

“Thanks," Josh said, nodding to Hank. He just didn't want there to be any doubts whatsoever as to his competence. Too much depended on him being able to do his job. And maybe it was lingering worries about his family and how their reputation might have once affected him. Which was silly now. They all had to band together, regardless of old family issues.

"At least I get plenty of practice with small bits of healing here. Not that I want to see anyone hurt, but if they're going to be, better that I heal them and get better."

"You're very welcome." He considered his bottom drawer longingly for a moment, then determined that he could not justify another from his limited stash of Twinkies just yet. "Small hurts and illnesses are certainly good practice for you," he continued once he'd shifted his attention back up to Josh. "And we are fortunate that we do not have to rely on our limited medical supplies for more grave ailments."

That was definitely a concern Josh kept in mind when he was doing triage and figuring out who needed his help first. While they could and did go out for supply runs, and medical supplies were out there to be found, they took some digging for, and everything they had was valuable. He held out one of his Twinkie pieces to Hank and popped another in his mouth. "You can have the rest," he offered.

Hank hesitated briefly then reached for the offered morsel with a broad grin. It hadn't escaped his notice that Josh wasn't exactly as enamored of the treat as he was, after all. "Many thanks, Mr. Foley."