Who: The Finn family - Caspian, Laura, Caitlyn; mentions of Dorian Sloan What: Arrival on Destruction Island When: May 14th, very late Where: Their new residence Rating: Mid - talk about death, emotional stress Status: Complete
”How much of my mother has my mother left in me?
How much of my love will be insane to some degree?
And what about this feeling that I’m never good enough?
Will it wash out in the water, or is it always in the blood?”
It had been a long few days. Getting shipped off to the Island had been quick and unpleasant, and definitely not what Laura had had in mind when Cas suggested an escape to Washington. The whole thing definitely had affected her negatively, but she did her best not to show it. Her cover officially blown, not only did the government know her real name, she was now effectively tagged and tracked for good. Like an animal. Her biggest fear had been being taken away from Cas and Caitlyn, but the reality was far worse. They were caught up in the mess now too.
And it had been downright traumatic for Caitlyn. Laura was doing everything in her power to comfort the little girl. When they were finally assigned housing after being processed, she tried to act excited and show her daughter their nice new house. But the poor thing was too shaken to really appreciate it. Finally, exhaustion set in and Caitlyn fell into a deep but restless sleep, clinging to her mother. Laura didn’t sleep, not yet. She was too busy brooding and trying to keep her child calm.
Seated on the stiff new couch in the large new living room, Laura kept her arm around Caitlyn as she slept beside her. She’d thought about carrying her to bed, but didn’t want to wake her. Laura had been silent for a long time, and now when she finally spoke up, her quiet voice cracked as she looked to Caspian. “What do we do now?”
Part of this was his doing; he had thrown the towel in on the whole undercover organization thing knowing the implications of quitting. Being hunted until the last breath escaped from your body in a bloody wheeze, everyone you love taken from you and doled the same fate. It was a risk he had considered for a long time, weighting the pros and cons. And then everything hit the fan all at once.
The last few days had felt like a whirlwind. Caspian hated not being in control of everything. Throughout his life he had been in complete control, things had been in the order he wanted them, when he wanted them. And now he felt as if he was so far from that sense of order that he didn’t know which way was up or down.
And their daughter had gotten caught up in the midst of it. That had been the worst part but he had nobody to blame. It wasn’t Laura’s fault the government had spotted her.
“Fuck if I know,” He snapped, instantly regretting it. His head was aching, fingers rubbed over the skin of his forehead. He hadn’t meant to be so harsh but he was as exhausted as both Caitlyn and Laura. “I’m sorry...it’s been a rough couple of days.” He didn’t want to start this first day off on the wrong foot in spite of what happened to them. “Why don’t we put her to bed, she can sleep in ours until she calms down.” His tone was calmer, that sense of rationale moving forward.
Being outed was one thing, he could handle that, but his wife and daughter exposed and caught up in everything was trying.
Laura’s gaze moved to him, unblinking as he snapped at her. An argument right now was far too exhausting, and she knew he was worn down too. She went silent again and just shook her head no. She knew the moment she moved, or they tried to move Caitlyn, she would wake and be upset again. She’d rather she get some rest here, comfortable or not. It was better than nothing.
Sighing, she lifted her free hand to rub at her stiff neck, eyes focused on the fresh clean flooring beneath them. Reluctantly, she spoke again softly. “Have you had any contact with Dorian since we arrived?’ She was sure Cas was worried about his friend, maybe hearing from him would help put him at ease a little.
“No,” came the reply. While he had been the caretaker for the younger man for many years Dorian was not his wife or his child. That didn’t mean he didn’t care for the man, didn’t love him in the sense one would love a member of their family, but the two people here meant more to him than anyone else in the world. Caspian shifted closer to Laura, willing the young girl into his own lap keeping her asleep with his ability long enough for the transfer.
Laura deserved a chance to get up and move. He held onto his daughter to give his wife a break.
He did his best never to use his powers on either of them. A vow had been made in silence to himself that he never would interfere with either of them no matter what and he hated himself for even tampering with their daughter for a moment. But Laura deserved a bit of relief, a chance to stretch.
“How are you doing?” The question might seem off putting, he expected the same snap of a reply he had given her, but he actually cared about her wellbeing enough to ask knowing the risk.
Gently helping to shift their daughter into his arms, Laura moved over carefully then pushed herself up to stand. She was stiff and tense and tired, but rest did not come easily. She began to pace, but it was the only thing she could do at the moment. She shook her head at his question, but didn’t snap. He wasn’t to blame in all of this.
“I’m sorry. This is all my fault.” Her voice was a quiet whisper, and she found it difficult to look at him. “I should have tried harder to hide. Maybe if they’d just discovered you, you could have gotten out of it. Then you and Caitlyn would be safe.”
“No,” he replied, shaking his head at her, “You aren’t to blame. It would have happened regardless. I brought us here and made it worse, I fear.” There was no way they could have predicted all of this. Now it was time to make the best of their situation. Giving up the dog was hard for Caitlyn, but there had not been a way to keep it.
“There is no life without you, love. I would not have let anyone take you, nor allowed Caitlyn to be without her mother.”
In all of their years apart their daughter had always been with both of them. He would have died before allowing any one of them to be taken away again.
Laura moved to stare out the window, her arms wrapped tightly around herself. She silently cursed herself for hoping too hard and dreaming too much. Things had finally begun to fall into place for them, maybe she’d wanted too much. Quickly swiping at her eyes, she turned back to Cas. Unsure of what to say, she just shrugged hopelessly.
Caspian laid Caitlyn down upon the too firm couch, keeping her at peace to let her rest. He hated all of this equally, each piece of their predicament, and yet he did his best to be strong for them. When their daughter was set he moved to get up. It didn’t take but a few moments to cross the room, drawing Laura into his embrace.
He pressed a kiss upon her mouth and held her gently. “We will get this sorted out, one way or the other, darling. I know that you and I both have faced greater odds before in our lives. Right now we have to be smart, be wise, stay quiet and wait for the time to strike.”
Being dormant wasn’t their thing but this couldn’t last forever, this odd oppression. Something would eventually come of it.
Moving into his arms, she buried her face in his chest. She heard his words and knew that he was right. She just needed a few moments to mourn what could have been. Hiding a few more discreet tears, she swallowed the rest back down and looked up to him. “Maybe we should try finding out more information from people who’ve been here a while. They can’t just… keep us here forever, right?”
He held onto her. Caspian would not stifle her emotions, he wouldn’t berate her for those tears. She had as much right as anybody else who walked the earth to feel and to grieve. Fingers lifted and brushed through her hair gently, doing his best to be comforting.
When her eyes found his he offered a smile, “That is not a bad idea.” Gathering intel discreetly was always good. It let them know what they were up against, but how they came about that information he was uncertain just then. It could be thought more about later when minds were clearer.
“Doubtful, but if there have been those here for more than a year or two I want to know know what’s keeping them from rising up.” The words were quiet, between them. They couldn’t have been the first people to question the system, to seek information.
Laura nodded, looking over to their sleeping child. “We can’t just let them keep us here. This is no place for her to grow up. We can’t expand our family here like this.”
Her voice shook a bit but she steeled herself to be strong. Maybe her hope of having another baby was gone, but she still had Caitlyn and Cas to worry about.
Even if that happened they would manage and work through it. “Laura, when has anybody ever made you do anything that you do not want to do?” She was a powerful mutant and there were few who could stand ground against her. “Why don’t we sleep tonight, try to get some rest and then formulate a plan in the morning? There has to be a way to leave this bloody place.”
It would do them no good to get worked up for no reason when each of them were running on frayed nerves and exhaustion.
“I will fix this.”
She watched him with a weak smile. Maybe with some rest she’d have a more optimistic perspective, or at least a clearer idea of how to proceed.
Leaning in, she kissed him softly. She wasn’t sure she’d be able to sleep, but at least she could try to focus on her family. “We will fix this. Together.”
He doubted he would get much sleep either. His mind was far too active to sleep but perhaps he could bring some peace to their daughter in the meantime. Over Laura’s shoulder he watched Caitlyn sleep. In spite of the ordeal she had been through she appeared calm. That was something good, at least.
And then his gaze fell back to Laura and he returned her kiss with one of his own, a gentle and tender connection.
“Together then,” Caspian murmured. He wouldn’t tell her no. They were married, a family, and so together they would be.
Another moment and he was pulling away. Fingers could catch her hand and he drew her toward where he guessed the bedrooms would be. “Probably wouldn’t hurt to get familiar with the place, the exits and such.” Just in case.
Fingers interlocked with his as she let him take the lead of the tour of their new home. She pursed her lips, looking around. “It is a beautiful cage to keep us in. At least we get to live well, all things considered.” If this same house was anywhere else, she might have actually enjoyed it.
She hadn’t paid much attention to the other residences on the island, but this was easily one of the largest. Which made her curious about why they’d been assigned it. Maybe there weren’t many other families.
She wasn’t wrong, the floor plan and the layout of the home was exquisite. It had plenty of room for all of them and then some. The idea of expanding their family would have to wait until things became sorted out but at least it was an option. Decor, furniture, everything they needed to live comfortably. “I suppose it is how you see it.” He hadnt meant her specifically, but the view in general.
Each room was at least considered if not stepped into. Bedrooms, bathrooms, closets.
Caspian pressed a flat palm upon the master bedroom mattress and tested it. “Not bad.”
Laura just nodded, silently surveying their new home. She’d only briefly looked at the kitchen, but it was large and well appointed. She made a note to find out about the food sources, they’d all benefit from a bit of comfort eating as they settled in.
She smirked a little as he tested the mattress. “We’ll need to break it in. Maybe we could christen the whole house, once our spirits are lifted a bit.”
At the comment Caspian turned to look at his wife unable to help the smirk painted across his face. His free hand lifted, catching her gently by the hip to draw her in close. “Do you think so? The whole place, then? I think we could rise to the challenge.”
He leaned in to catch her lips in a series of small but passionate kisses, mouth slipping to the edge of her jaw and then the curve of her neck. Teasing the skin, he let her go after a moment. Both of them were exhausted but that made her no less beautiful.
“There is something to look forward to, at the very least.”
Stepping closer to him, she slipped her arms around his neck. “We have to focus on something positive.” Although Laura was relatively sure that the world could fall apart around them and she would still want time alone with her husband.
She returned his kisses deeply, her head tilting back as his mouth explored her skin. She smiled softly, keeping her arms around him even when he pulled his head back. “I love you. I don’t think I’d be able to handle this without you here to keep me sane.”
The world would fall apart regardless. It was up to them to make their slice of it pleasant no matter what befell them. Together they were stronger though he knew she would be just fine on her own if she had to be. For years she had gotten by before and after him, what was a bit more time if in the end they got what they wanted? “Can I just focus on you? Is that enough?” Caspian quipped, swaying with her as if coaxing Laura into a dance without really moving.
“I love you too, darling,” he breathed out, satisfied. And then he smiled softly at her, shrugging, “You would find a way for yourself and for Caitlyn. I don’t have any plans in the near future to vanish, but we have to consider that a possibility. More tomorrow, though. Right now I just want to focus on you.”
Smiling faintly, she let him lead her, swaying in his arms easily. “I can’t really argue with that. Whatever makes you happy.”
Arching a brow at his words, she shook her head, her arms tightening around him. “You know I wouldn’t just let anyone steal you away from us. And if somehow they did, there’d be hell to pay. Literally.”
“You make me happy,” he replied.
It was truth. He couldn’t live without her, or their child.
He couldn’t help that sense of pride but he was able to tone it down. “I’d expect no less, but that’s not the point. I would hope you’d move on regardless. Our child needs her mother.”
“And you make me happier than I ever imagined I could be.” Sighing, she leaned her head on his shoulder. “We just need to find a way to get the rest of the world to cooperate with that happiness.”
She closed her eyes and shook her head. She could not imagine moving on without Cas. She hadn’t truly lived before him, and if she ever lost him for good, she would never truly live again. She would exist, go through the motions and do her best with Caitlyn, but she knew she could never be happy if he was gone from their lives. “Our child needs both of us. So no more of this talk.”
He rocked with her there, arms around her still. The same was true for him - he needed Laura, needed Caitlyn to survive. Before they’d worked through their differences he had not truly been living, nor had he really been with anybody else. He was meant for her and she for him. It was a strong bond forged in darkness and he wouldn’t have it any other way. “If it is there we shall find it, but it will take some time.”
Caspian nodded at her. He was tired and a bit hungry, so he was unwilling to argue about anything. “Why don’t we put Caitlyn to bed and then figure out what food is looking like. After that the night is ours to do what we will with.” Plot, scheme, or sleep. Whatever she wanted.
Pulling away slowly, she nodded to his suggestion. Keeping her hand in his, she led him out of the room slowly. Returning to Caitlyn on the couch, she picked her up gently and brought her to her new bedroom. Laura was concerned about leaving her in the strange new room alone, but once under the covers, the little girl drifted off to an even deeper sleep.
He let her draw away but not too far, hand fallen to clasp within. His steps were heavy from the day but light enough to not wake their daughter. It was only when Caitlyn was reached for did Caspian let Laura go.
Following to the girls new room he helped with getting their daughter out of her shoes, situated beneath the covers.
And then his hand was finding Laura’s again, drawing her from the room quietly. He would hear Caitlyn stir long before anyone else but the girl seemed finally at peace for now.
Into the corridor and down to the kitchen he let Laura go and made for the fridge. “Well, it isn’t empty, but it’s not necessarily as full as I would like.”
Reluctantly, Laura followed Caspian out of Caitlyn’s room. Once in the kitchen, she dropped down into a chair and rubbed at her eyes. She looked to him with a sigh. “They said something about how we go about getting food, I don’t remember all the details right now though.”
It seemed as if someone had placed the most basic necessities in the fridge, things any family would need to survive not thrive. Nothing was name branded; the boxes were generic, the bottles and labels colorful enough to evoke cheer, perhaps trust, but you weren’t getting things which made you feel comfortable that one might be used to on the outside. A soft huff of a breath and the door to the fridge was closed. He turned to the cupboard, pulling it open in effort to uncover what was there.
Each cabinet came open and then was closed. The pantry was the same as the fridge - nothing provoking, just small amounts of basic needs.
“It’ll come back to us. Someone else has to know more than we do,” He assured her, turning to look at Laura from the pantry threshold, “Or if they’re unwilling to talk I know ways of making them more eager to spill.” Plus he could read minds, there was that bonus.
Was that done with every house assignment? A pre-stock of basic items? He wondered if there would be towels in the bathroom. The place was furnished and made to look inviting, sheets on the beds, but he doubted clothes in the closet. They’d brought little of their own things with them - only what had been allowed.
Laura watched, leaning her chin on her hand. She was vaguely hungry, but the looks of what was available made her hesitate. “Do you think it’s safe to eat? They’re not exactly thrilled to have an island full of us. What if it’s contaminated?”
She wasn’t going to give anything to Caitlyn without making sure it was safe first.
“Darling, I doubt we have much of a choice.” Caspian emitted a heavy sigh. “Eat or starve.” Laura could starve if she wanted to, he would to support her, but he would not allow his daughter to not be without food. “Let’s go out on a limb and say this island is controlled by the Government for purposes of housing people like us with abilities,” he began, looking at the closed cabinet door, “they couldn’t get away with not providing food to people for too long. It would make the headlines somewhere. People are more in tune with their resources these days.”
His gaze drifted to her. “I can’t tell you if things are safe, I have no way of knowing. But I can read the mind of the delivery person if that would ease you, my love. However wasting away on this plot of piss island is not something that I find thrilling.”
Laura just smirked a little. “Cas, you know better than that. People… regular people, they don’t all support us. Do you really think they would all care if we starved to death? Some might actually enjoy it. If this place was making headlines, we would have heard about it before being shipped here.”
Frowning, she looked around the room thoughtfully. Maybe she was being paranoid. But, she had more direct experience with what the government could and would do to them when given the chance. Still, he was right. “Alright.”
“Ah, but this place would not have been here so long if everyone was a skeleton, my love. If they’re starving, nobody is talking about it.” Caspian turned a circle, he leaned against the pantry door and opened up his mind. He was seeking answers. Here and there things came. Extending his reach was risky but he did it regardless - trying to bring some comfort to his family. His frame slumped, expression lax and nearly robotic.
His nose began to bleed at some point, fresh red droplets cascading down the curve of his mouth.
So much information was coming into his mind at once he was struggling with processing through it.
Frowning, Laura sprang from her chair and moved to Caspian. She glanced around, but then just used the hem of her shirt to wipe at the blood from his nose. Shaking her head, she sighed, speaking softly. “Stop. Please, it’s not worth it. Not right now. You’re already exhausted from the trip.”
She hated to see him suffering from his abilities, and if she could, Laura would take that pain away from him. But for now she was helpless, holding him close and waiting for him to close the connection.
theyrewatchinguspleasestopdontdothatpleasehelpme
His pupils dilated. So caught up in the transmission he could barely hear his wife speak but her arms around him acted as an anchor and his head tilted to the side. A breath, a slow exhale, and his mind snapped back into place. Those blue eyes went back to normal and he looked at Laura.
Arms lifted, winding around her. The whites of his eyes were bloodshot, his nose was still trickling but less this time. “Later then.”
Holding him firmly, she guided him to the nearest chair to sit. She wiped more of the blood away and stayed close, her hand gripping his tightly. “What did you hear?” Laura knew she should just let him rest and wait to find out later, but something told her that whatever it was, wasn’t good. She just wanted to be prepared, to be able to protect her family the best she could.
He moved with her, frame stiff. The chair was comforting and he did his best to relax into it. The cushions were stiff from never having been sat in before akin to how they would feel on the floor of a showroom at a furniture store.
“This is not a good place,” he murmured. “Someone was asking for help. Another voice said that they were watching.” His voice came to drop in decibel as if he was telling a secret. He could find more things but she would have to trust him to do so. There would be more blood.
Sitting close to him, she frowned. It wasn’t exactly surprising, but disheartening nonetheless. Nodding, she squeezed his hand. “Let’s just try to get some rest for tonight. There’s nothing we can do right now, and I don’t want you hurting yourself any more than necessary.”
At times like this, Laura felt useless. Her fire would not help him feel better, or help them gain any more information. It was only truly useful in times of vengeance, and for once she wanted to try avoid any more pain and drama. You only burned the world down when there was nothing left to lose.
He nodded.
Tomorrow, after they had recuperated they would tackle the bigger problems. For now he was exhausted and his head ached. “Alright.”
The fire inside of her was valuable but he wouldn’t exploit it. There was something wrong with the island, it was broken, but he would worry about it tomorrow.
Her hand was gripped, he moved from the chair and forward to the bedroom.
Holding his hand firmly, she led him back to their bedroom. With silent worry, she helped him undress and get into bed, making sure he was comfortable first before following suit to join him. Laying on her side next to him, she watched him intently and placed a soft kiss to his cheek.
Things like this happened, he would get past it as always. That was the risk he took overloading his system. His hand stayed firmly in hers as they moved toward the bedroom. It was too quiet there - he missed already the sounds of the night New York had offered all the years they’d spent there.
Undressing, he moved to lay down next to Laura, an arm wound around her. Instantly he found comfort and offered her a smile. “Don’t fret, my love, I’ll be fine. Just rest. I’ll be doing the same thing.” Words were soft.
Moving into his arms, she held him tight and nodded. She would try to sleep, but she already knew that if it wasn’t her worry that kept her up, it would be the nightmares that were brought on by reminders of this situation. Leaning up, she kissed him again gently. “Goodnight.”