Who: Remy/Zayne When: after the pizza party Where: home What: talking Rating: low Warnings: none
Remy knew he probably should have talked to Zayne before bringing up the fight but he was being a chicken. He knew that Zayne wouldn’t like the idea that he was willing to die for the cause. And he couldn’t blame him. Remy wouldn’t like it if the tables were turned. But deep down he would understand. And he knew Zayne would. Well, he hoped he would.
After speaking with Daryn and Phobia, Remy had spent most of the rest of the party up in his own head. As soon as they agreed his mind began running a million miles a minute as he worked through the plans that had only been a ‘maybe’ in his mind up to this point. It wasn’t until they got to the door of their place that he slowed down enough, mentally, to be nervous about the upcoming conversation.
Once they were inside Remy decided to go for broke. It would be important to get it out of the way. He hated that he hadn’t been open with Zayne before so now it was time to rip off the bandaid. Once they were inside and the door locked Remy sat down on the couch and tugged Zayne down into his lap. “I’m going to preface this with an apology because I’ve been avoiding talking to you about something and I shouldn’t have been.”
---
Zayne had noticed something was off with Remy but didn’t push it. It wasn’t the place and he trusted Remy would talk to him if there was an issue. Though he was glad to get home and relax. He was glad that Phoenix seemed to enjoy herself. He made a mental note to try to swing by more often. Living on the island had to be hard.
Zayne curled up against Remy once he was tugged down onto his lap. This was still his favourite place to be; sitting with Remy. He nuzzled against, using that opportunity to hide his frown when Remy said he was starting this with an apology. That didn’t sound good.
“What’s going on?” Zayne asked, moving slightly so he could look at Remy face on.
---
When Zayne snuggled in Remy closed his eyes and savored the feeling. It would be so easy to just lose himself in Zayne and not think about everything else that was going on. And part of him wanted to do exactly that. But he wouldn’t be happy with himself. He couldn’t walk away.
Bringing a hand up Remy ran fingers through Zayne’s hair as he looked at him. “I’ve been kind of putting some plans together in my head for a while. Plans about how we could truly fight back and actually have a chance of taking control of the island to get out of here.” He kept his fingers moving through Zayne’s hair. It was calming and it helped him focus. “Up until tonight it’s all just been ideas but I talked with Daryn and Phobia tonight. They agree that it’s time to step up and really fight back. So these plans that have been in my head are going to become more than that.” He paused letting that sink in and to give Zayne a chance to ask questions before he went on.
---
Zayne wasn’t surprised to hear that Remy had been thinking about ways to continue to fight back. Public opinion may have swayed in their favour for now but Zayne didn’t trust it. Something could happen and they would sway back. Sure, it looked like things were better now but it didn’t truly feel like it. They had to continue the fight. Dorothea was pushing for Zayne to come out now, while the public was on their side. She insisted it was the best plan. She waited for his okay.
Zayne leaned against Remy’s touch and asked, “So what’s the plan then? How do we fight back?”
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Remy smiled. He should have known Zayne would be that easy about it. Well, for now. He wouldn’t like when they were separated for the battle but that didn’t need to be brought up tonight. Not yet anyway. Or he could bring it up … he would see how the rest went. He wasn’t sure he was up for that kind of fight.
“We will be putting together three teams. One will go for the barracks to trap and detain as many guards as possible. The second will take the docks and gain control of all of the transportation to and from the island. And the third will be going after the top brass. Once we control all three we will have control of the island.” It sounded so simple when laid out like that.
---
It did sound simple and Zayne knew it wouldn’t be. He sat up, so he wasn’t quite leaning on Remy completely now. He was getting too comfortable and he wanted to focus on Remy and now how much he wanted to fall asleep on Remy. Or other things.
“All three go at once?” Zayne asked. This would be an undertaking. They would need a lot of people involved to pull off and… now he thought about the risk. Zayne would fight with Remy. He knew what this meant. There was no decision of not fighting with him, “And you? You would go for the brass?”
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When Zayne sat up Remy shifted so that they were more directly looking at each other. He let his hands trail down to rest at Zayne’s hips. It was the best way to keep focus on the subject and not let his mind, and hands, wander to much more pleasurable places.
“Essentially, yes. That way there is no chance of warning going out to the other locations about the attacks.” Remy nodded. He knew Zayne would fight. He was just as passionate about getting out of here as Remy was. That was never in question. Remy wouldn’t have been able to keep doing what he was doing without Zayne’s support. At Zayne’s question about him he nodded. “Yes. It will be me and Phobia.”
---
Phobia was a good choice to go with. He was smart in his movements and he could get ahead in places that others couldn’t. Plus, he was kind of a telepath, even if they couldn’t fully call him that. He could sense fears which was almost as good as sensing people approaching. Zayne couldn’t really think of anyone better to be with Remy.
“Leading it, right?” Zayne asked, “You will have others? I guess it depends how many want to fight with you or in general.”
---
Remy hadn’t told Phobia yet that he would be with him but he knew Phobia wouldn't object. The two of them worked well together and he was the right choice. He also knew Phobia was willing to do whatever it took and this was likely to be the most dangerous of the missions.
“Yes.” Remy nodded. “We will need two or three others but we will need to keep it to a small team. And people with weapons experience. I suspect we will encounter the most resistance. And yes. It will very much depend though if the feeling on the island is any indication we may have a lot of help.”
---
“I’m coming with you,” Zayne said. It felt obvious. Okay. So he didn’t have weapon experience. He wasn’t a fighter like what Remy was probably picturing but there was no way he was going to let Remy go in on his own. Not that Remy would be on his own but still, he wasn’t going to not be there with Remy during this. Zayne was going to help him with this and he would be there right with him, doing whatever he could.
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Remy had been expecting that. He would have been surprised if Zayne hadn’t brought it up but he knew this wasn’t going to be easy. He just hoped that it didn’t hurt too much. Remy rarely said no to Zayne and when he did, he hated it. “No.” Remy said simply. He brought a hand up to gently cup Zayne’s cheek. “I won’t be able to focus if you’re with me and you will be needed elsewhere. The team that goes after the docks will be in charge of taking care of any wounded and I’ll need you there.”
---
Zayne frowned slightly. He understood Remy’s reasoning but he didn’t accept it. He shook his head and said, “You have Daryn for that. She shouldn’t be at the brass fight. She can help at the docks. If you or Phobia get hurt trying to go in, you need someone at your side who can help you then. There.” He didn’t add that he could try to enhance their abilities. He wasn’t entirely how well that worked yet, not entirely sure how to do that without singing, which meant he couldn’t be quiet. But he could heal them if anything happened. He shook his head again, “I’m going with you.”
---
Remy listened to what Zayne had to say. He would always listen. And Zayne made some good points but it didn’t work. “No.” He said it again but a bit softer. “You don’t have the right training or the right powers. You would be a liability and a distraction. I can’t let you go with me, Zayne.”
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It didn’t matter if Remy was right. He knew he didn’t have the right training and he knew he could be a problem but it didn’t matter. Zayne also knew what Remy would have to face and he wasn’t going to sit back and have a tea party while Remy had the most dangerous job.
“I’m not a liability,” Zayne said firmly, “I get it. I’m not the most skilled. I know… I’m not Phobia. But I also know it will be dangerous and you go after the brass? They aren’t going to roll over and let you take the island. Not after the stunt they just pulled. Not after everything. I’m not just going to wait around and hope for the best. I’d have your back. I’d have everyone’s back. You can’t say no.”
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“I know you would have my back and everyone else’s. Which is why I need you available to help those who are hurt. This is about more than just you and me, Zayne. I know you know that. I have to be objective about this. I have to look at the bigger picture and leave my emotions out of it. I, we need you at the docks. I need you backing up Daryn and I need you to leave this mission to me and Phobia. Without you.”
---
Zayne fell silent. He knew Remy needed to do this and he would do it well and in order to do that, he would have to keep his emotions out of it. He knew Remy was right on all counts. He might be better suited elsewhere but that didn’t mean Zayne wanted to be elsewhere. What if something happened? He didn’t want to be elsewhere, distracted and worried about Remy. He wanted to be there with him. He needed to be with him.
“I don’t agree,” Zayne said softly, “I know you are right and you are making the decisions best for everyone but I want to be there with you. I don’t… I want to be with you.”
---
“Zayne.” Remy cupped both of Zayne’s cheeks and looked into his eyes. “I have to do this. And I have to do this without you.” He said it simply and flatly and said nothing else for a long few heartbeats. “This can’t be about us. It can’t be about wanting to be together and wanting to support each other. It has to be about everyone who is trapped here and stepping up to end it.”
---
Zayne really didn’t need to be told that. He put his hands over Remy’s cheeks. Or maybe he did need to be told this because he was still fighting it. He was silent as he looked at Remy, memorized and committed everything about Remy to memory.
“You have to promise me you’ll come back and you won’t be hurt and I can take you to Disney World when this is over,” Zayne said. He knew Remy couldn’t promise that but he wanted Remy to anyway. It was the only way he would agree and stop fighting this.
---
Remy looked back, meeting Zayne’s eyes. He knew Zayne knew what he was saying and he knew it had to be that way. But it wasn’t easy to accept and he couldn't blame him. It wasn’t easy to tell him no.
When Zayne mentioned Disney World Remy smiled. “I promise you when this is over we will go to Disney World and we will wear matching Mickey ears and eat cotton candy and popcorn. We’ll take pictures with Donald and Mary Poppins and close down the park.”
---
Zayne leaned forward and kissed Remy. He was agreeing, silently. He would be at the docks. He would help people there. It was where he was best suited but he didn’t like it and he knew he would be worried sick the entire time. Until Remy was in his arms again, he wouldn’t be happy. Zayne kissed Remy again.
“And watch the fireworks and ride all the rides,” Zayne said, putting a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, “We’ll celebrate the victory of being free.”
---
Remy returned the kiss and silently thanked Zayne for agreeing. It wasn’t easy. It wouldn't be easy. None of this would be. They would be torn and anxious and worried until it was over and they were back on the mainland.
Remy’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes either. “Yes. And then we’ll do it again the next day because you can’t do it all in one day.”
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“But it won’t matter how many days it takes us because we won’t be here,” Zayne said. He still wanted to fight. He still wanted to argue this but he knew it wasn’t going to help. Remy needed to focus on planning to make sure that he would succeed. Zayne fighting with him wouldn’t help.
Zayne kissed him again and said, “Since we are being serious… Dorothea has been emailing. She says now is the time to do the big reveal. Opinion is on our side. It will help. She’s just waiting on me to say yes.”
---
“Exactly. We’ll have all the time we need.” Remy agreed. He was relieved that Zayne wasn’t going to keep putting up a fight. It was hard enough to say no as it was. If Zayne had kept pushing ….he needed to focus.
Remy returned the kiss easily. He wasn’t surprised by what Zayne had said. Maybe he should have been. “What do you think?”
---
Zayne shifted so he could rest his head against Remy’s shoulder. He closed his eyes and breathed in that very Remy smell. His stomach twisted up. He knew he would be worried about Remy until this was over. He had always known it would go this way, one day. He just didn’t think that day would be sooner than later.
“I think she’s right,” Zayne said, “I’m not… I’m not egoistical enough to think it will change anything on the island but if can do anything, shift things enough to help everyone, to help smooth things for an easier transition on the island… I’d be selfish not to.”
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When Zayne shifted Rem wrapped his arms around him and nuzzled into Zayne’s hair. This was one of his favorite positions. Zayne in his lap, snuggled close. It felt good. It felt right and he wasn’t letting go. Ever.
Remy nodded at his words. “I don’t disagree.” he said softly. “Though I’m not sure about the selfish part.” He pressed a kiss into Zayne’s hair. “You will always be Zayne. No matter what other people call you or how they see you. You are Zayne now. Remember that.”
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It bothered him about what people would think or say once they knew the truth. It made him worry about the coffee shop. Would things change? Remy was right: Zayne was Zayne now. He wouldn’t let this change that. He was happier this way and he didn’t want to lose that.
Zayne nodded and said, “I’ll email her in the morning. Now… I just want to stay here with you and,” he shifted ever so slightly so he could kiss Remy’s neck.
---
Remy could understand his worries. There was a reason he had given up Alistair to become Zayne in the first place. But that didn’t mean that he ever had to go back. And Remy was going to make sure to remind him of that when he needed it.
“Sounds like a good plan to me.” Remy purred and tilted his head, his hand coming up to thread fingers into Zayne’s hair again as he kissed his neck. “Should we relocate?”