dhorrible_mod (dhorrible_mod) wrote in deeply_horrible, @ 2013-05-13 02:27:00 |
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Entry tags: | *2013 fest, *ss2013, rating: pg, type: fic |
Sloppy Seconds Day 8: Snap
Title: Snap
Author: gamma_x_orionis
Pairing: Severus/Irma, past Severus/Lily
Rating: PG
Prompt: "Each man kills the thing he loves, by each let this be heard. Some do it with a bitter look, some with a flattering word. The coward does it with a kiss, the brave man with a sword."
Content Information/Warnings: Murder
Summary: It would be so easy to take just a few steps forward and put his hands around her neck and snap it, snap it so hard that she wouldn't feel a moment of pain. Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Author's Notes: I cannot express how much of a joy this fest was to write for :D A huge thank you to the mods for running it! ♥
Severus came to Irma's bedroom out of a vague sense of obligation, nothing more. She bored him, and yet he depended on her for a single interpersonal relationship in his life. If it were not for her, he doubted that he would bother turning up to classes or meals anymore. He would simply sit in his office and waste away. Having someone who did not wish him dead was a pleasant change, whether or not he felt the same way about her.
She was already asleep when he arrived that night — the sun had long since set, and he had made no hurry in coming to her. He stepped in and shut the door, and Irma did not acknowledge him except to let out a very small snore.
She was in her chair, eyes closed but her glasses still perched on her nose and her book propped open on her lap. Her head lolled to the side, giving her the look of a large bird with a broken neck.
Severus leaned against the door, looking at her and tapping his fingers lightly against the frame.
It would be so easy to take just a few steps forward and put his hands around her neck and snap it, snap it so hard that she wouldn't feel a moment of pain. Two steps. Two hands. Snap. Easy, and delightful. A relief.
If Severus had been any sort of man, he would have done it years ago. There had been opportunities enough — Irma, so sharp and alert where her precious books had been concerned, had always been over-trusting of him. She had fallen asleep in bed beside him — even on nights when she had commented on his moodiness, irritability, or any of the other thousand and one reasons why sleeping next to him might be unsafe. It was stupid of her, really — Severus himself would have sooner died than be so vulnerable.
But then, women were silly in that way. They enjoyed being vulnerable — he expected that thought it romantic to be at another person's mercy. He found the concept unappealing in its slavishness. Did they ever think — even to themselves — of how ridiculous and humiliating it really was to trust someone so much that they could, at any moment, destroy them?
It would be kinder, Severus thought, to destroy her quite literally, with two hands around her neck, than to let her keep on living, eventually completely destroying herself and making herself into a fool for him. It would almost be chivalrous...
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Irma stirred, and Severus tensed like a captured animal — was she somehow aware of his presence, his thoughts? But no, a moment later, she was still again, with her head tilted now to the other side.
He ought to do it quickly, sever her life before she could wake up and he could lose his nerve. Two steps. Two hands. Snap. he berated himself. He was too attached to her, that was the source of the problem — and how had he let himself become attached? He was not interested in her in any romantic sense. Lily had been the only person for whom he had ever allowed himself to feel love, and that had been an unmitigated disaster — a mistake he would not repeat. He didn't love Irma, didn't even particularly care for her — she was shrill and unpleasant and embodied none of the characteristics he had admired in Lily and all those he despised in himself. And yet, here he stood, granted with an opportunity to destroy her, and he hesitated.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap. He would let her wake and he would kiss her and pretend as if he had never had such bitter thoughts about her, thoughts about killing her. Two steps. Two hands. Snap. He would kiss her, as he always did, mechanically. Two steps. Two hands. Snap. He would do nothing, and let her continue her life as a stupid, over-trusting mess — just like his own mother, just like Lily — because he didn't have the bravery to stop her.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap. Easy.
Severus tightened his fists and found his palms slick. He clenched his robes between his fingers to dry them.
No one would know. All the years of training himself in Occlumency — training himself before he even knew what he was doing, training himself until it was second nature — would be enough to stop even Dumbledore from seeing into his mind. He could destroy the evidence. He could make it look like an accident. He could put a rope around her neck and hang her from the rafters and no one would think any more of it — Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
Severus took one step forward. The floorboards squeaked beneath his shoe, just enough for him to freeze, eyes warily on Irma, hands half-raised. She didn't move.
He took another step forward. He was standing over her now, and still she was unaware of his presence. Her breathing was quiet and heavy, with just a hint of a nasal whine to it when she inhaled.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.
He raised his hands. Moonlight from the window cast his shadow faintly over her, and he looked spidery and demonic, a creature out of nightmares with spindly fingers and flowing robes, come to steal her life away.
But it was a mercy.
He was doing it for her sake — and doing it because he was brave, brave enough to destroy her before she destroyed herself.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap. Easy, he thought, as he lowered his hands to rest ever so lightly on either side of her exposed throat.
Two steps. Two hands. Snap.