MERCENARY FOR HIGHER! Need someone dead? I'm your guy! Need a hot date? They call me Merc with a mouth for more than just one reason.

Don't be shy, call this guy! For a fee. Always a fee.

If giant rats were not bad enough, now there are these flying bug things. And they are fuzzy and huge and disgusting.

We are going to need an extremely large amount of insect repellent in New York. Or an unusually competent exterminator.

This summer is lasting longer than the one on Game of Thrones, and that's saying something. I feel like the Stark family may have been lying to us this whole time.

( Private to Oracle, Zatanna, Nightwing )

Well,thank whatever powers are up there for this sudden downpour.

Who wants to dance in the rain with me?

[Guardians private communication network Encryption failed.]

14:21. This is Dupli-Kate requesting sit-rep. Guardians, please report.

14:21. Immortal, this is your wife, please report.

14:27. Any Global Defense Agency operative, please respond. Dupli-Kate requesting immediate sit-rep.

14:33. Robot, please report. Requesting immediate sit-rep.

14:41. Fucking Guardians of the Globe, this is Dupli-Kate. Where the hell is my husband?

14:50. Honey, I swear, if you don't answer me this moment I will divorce you and take the children.

15:03. Is anyone receiving? Please respond.

Man, I bet Star would love these mutant rat things. We hit up a world with a serious squid infestation a couple years-ish(?) back, it was hilarious watching his eyes light up. Kid in a candy shop.

Speaking of Star: anybody seen a tall white guy around, red hair, muscles, one glowy eye, one facial tattoo, four blades, a million bad pickup lines, answers to Shatterstar? If you do, send him my way.

In other news and a supremely weird twist of fate, I guess I'm doing some contracting for the Avengers and the Justice League now. On a very temporary basis. I'm not joining up no matter how much you all beg to have me.

This? This right here? This is the reason I quit the Avengers. So much for a semi-normal life.

At least it's not space. At least it's not a war again.