InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Daddy, how do I flush you?"

Mikhail Petrov (romvanator) wrote in darkdividerpg,
@ 2015-09-22 13:19:00

Entry tags:

character: mikhail petrov, character: raj lodi, date: 06.19.15

I'm only a man with a candle to guide me
Who: Mikhail and Raj
What: More aftermath
When: Friday, June 19th, wee hours of the morning
Where: Raj's apartment
Warning: TBD

Mikhail had stayed with Raj the day after Danny's death, waiting until his lover went to work before he left. He needed to clear his head, deal with the sins he'd absorbed from the werewolf. The familiar, soul crushing feelings of impotent rage, guilt, and loneliness. He knew how it felt to be certain your life had no meaning and you could only destroy. Rich had taught him to turn this inwards, to punish himself and the monsters instead of innocent people. But how easily it could have played out differently.

How easily he could have become just like Danny. Destructive, bitter, hurting everyone around him because of his own pain. The thought made Mikhail's stomach churn.

Mikhail had only managed to stay away for a day. Avoiding Raj when he wanted nothing more than the comfort of the wolf's presence wasn't working. Maybe he was right, maybe the self-denial was only making his inner demon hungrier. Perhaps drowning it in good things was the best way to fight it. The demon loved misery and destruction. There was only peace and comfort to be found in the company of the young wolf.

He waited until it was late enough he knew Rajesh would be home from work before returning. Mikhail vaguely realized he should have probably left a note or text message, something to let his lover know he wasn't gone for good. Even though all of his possessions were there except the clothes he was wearing and the minimal weapons he felt comfortable leaving the house with. Raj would know he wasn't leaving forever, right?

Unlocking the door and letting himself into the apartment, Mikhail went in search of his lover. "I'm sorry," he apologized immediately. "I should have said something before I left." He knew how Raj still worried every time he turned his back when Mikhail was out of sorts the gypsy might just disappear for good. "I didn't mean to worry you."

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unchainedwolf
2015-09-22 08:46 pm UTC (link)

Raj had expected Mikhail to leave. He didn't blame him. There had been a lot of shit that went down and he knew his lover would need to decompress. Mikhail tended to do that better alone. He always came back, so Raj tried not to worry too much while he was gone. He'd gone to work the following day and tried not to spend every waking second thinking about Mikhail and failed miserably. He returned home that night and spent most of the evening with the other man on his mind.

After he'd showered, he took up residence on the sofa and listened to the sounds of the night. It was only when he heard the sound of the key in the lock that he sat up on the couch and turned his head towards the door. He wasn't sure how long he'd thought Mikhail would stay gone, but he supposed he thought it would be longer than a day. He blinked a little, but listened to what Mikhail had to say.

"I knew you'd come back," he told him, shaking his head a little. "You've been through a lot. Figured that you needed to clear your head." Maybe in the back of his mind he'd thought that Mikhail would run away for good, but he tried to ignore that tiny voice. He knew that he didn't mean to worry him, though, so the apology was unneeded. "You're here now," he told him, shrugging his shoulder. "No need to apologize. Are you alright?"

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romvanator
2015-09-22 08:54 pm UTC (link)

Mikhail used to believe it was better for him to do everything alone. Now he wasn't so sure. Raj's understanding helped more than he wanted to admit. "I did," he agreed. Not that his head felt any clearer. Slipping off his boots and socks, he deposited the former by the door and the latter in the hamper as he went to go wash his hands and face. He probably needed a shower, but right now he just wanted to be close to Raj. "Tired. A little hungry." He was not all right at all, but he didn't exactly know how to articulate it. Especially considering who's sins he was wrestling with. Mikhail wouldn't blame Raj for having no sympathy for Danny. Not after what the man had done to his family.

	romvanator 2015-09-22 09:21 pm UTC (link)
	Mikhail nodded. He'd hoped for something better than that, but knew from experience that years of trauma and abuse couldn't be undone in a day. The next question was met with a moment of silence before he shrugged. "The scratches and bruises are almost gone," he said. "I'll be all right." It would just take time, right? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	unchainedwolf 2015-09-24 09:57 pm UTC (link)
	He laughed at the comment. "I think you like watching the supernatural ones to pick apart what they do wrong," he teased, nudging him gently with his elbow, grinning broadly at his lover. It was amusing at the very least. The fact that he read all the Bronte books was amusing too. The little things about Mikhail were what he fell in love with the most. (Reply to this) (Parent)