Jacob 'Monster Catnip' Sloper (lopingsloper) wrote in cultureic, @ 2015-12-15 04:51:00 |
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"Another lager!" Asher shouted, practically throwing himself at the bar. It was Saturday night and even without the whole of the Critter department there (sans poor Peter, who had a date with his mystery ball and chain) the place was crammed. With the Critters, a group of brave folk who tended to be, on average, more muscular than most thanks to their occasional werewolf-wrangling duties, there was barely room to breathe. So when Asher got his beer and turned to see an empty stool next to him, he hopped up on it as quickly as he could grab it. Good, he could see over the bar better now. He could also see Jacob, one of his favourite colleagues. "Hey, Sloper," he called out. One thing he liked about the DRMC, compared to the DMLE certainly, was that they seemed to get along better. They were more laid back. He didn't have to call Jacob 'sir.' Or at least, he never had. They were buddies, or so Asher assumed. "Cheers, mate." For all his bluster and claims at misanthropy, Jacob couldn't help but like the Critter department's regular pub nights. Granted, he mused as he downed some more of his Guinness, the alcohol probably helped that along, but there were other points in their favour. It was nice to unwind, especially with how things kept escalating for their department, the danger and the stress. And as much as he complained about his co-workers, their youthful energy, and their endless antics, the sense of community was nice. Going out with them one night a month and buying them a few rounds before he popped home for the night helped him feel just a little less lonely. Spotting Asher, Jacob rolled his eyes and let out a disgruntled noise. "Greengrass," he nodded curtly, raising his glass in a brief toast, "Cheers." He honestly hoped the kid would leave it at that, as he'd been working his last nerve lately with his stupid pranks and jokes. 'Leave it at that' was not in Asher's dictionary, but he was in a pretty jovial mood already which meant it was less likely that he'd be messing with anyone for fun. Flirting was a different story, but at least when flirting his intentions weren't meanspirited. Or, at least not entirely mean-spirited. Even when he flirted for a laugh, or just to see if the person responded, he'd never do it if he wasn't actually willing to sleep with the person. And now Jacob sat in front of him. Conveniently the seat behind him opened up, and Asher slipped into it, taking a long drink of his beer before setting it on the bar in front of him and turning toward the older man and giving the him a large grin. And a wink. "Good turnout, innit?" Most of the department had come. "Well, except for Petey — er, Pete. Said he's got something what going on with his girlfriend, though wouldn't tell us who she is. Thought maybe it was someone in the department, but they're pretty much all here so… dunno." He shrugged. "So, you seeing anyone right now?" Letting out another of those disgruntled noises when Greengrass decided to take a seat and settle down instead of heading back over to the others, Jacob had to bite back a laugh when the subject of his lovelife came up, dark and self-deprecating. Taking another drink, he shook his head as he set his glass down, "Nope." Glancing briefly over at Asher, he made no effort whatsoever to continue the small talk, hoping that the younger man would take the hint. "What a shame! Maybe you can find someone here." Asher Greengrass, as a rule, did not take hints. Most of the time he didn't get them, because he couldn't quite understand why anyone wouldn't want to talk to him, but the few times he did understand, he generally refused. Because, again, why would anyone not want to talk to him? They clearly didn't know him well enough to understand how fantastic he was. But Jacob had a soft spot for Asher, or so he believed. He took a glance around, then focused back on the man beside him. "What's your type? See anyone around here? I can be your wingman." He pointed to a young wizard who looked a little bit like Asher himself but a few years older. "What about that bloke? He's good-looking." Jacob initially bit his tongue, not wanting to hand Greengrass anymore ammunition for the bizarre, prolonged prank he seemed to be playing on him. He didn't know what Asher's game was, or what his ultimate endgame was, but he knew enough to know he didn't like it. But the longer he let the silence sit between them, the more he find his gaze drawn to the wizard Asher had pointed out, and he felt the need to defend himself growing. Deciding he'd need another Guinness if he was going to discuss this, he flagged the bartender down and ordered another. "Too young," he admitted gruffly once that was done. "Yeah, not my type either. I mean, he's all right but...." Asher shrugged, clinking his glass against Jacob's again, since the older man now had a new beer. "I like them a little more hairy, personally. You know, the gruff type? Looks like he might be able to break me in half?" Jacob cocked an eyebrow when Asher started talking, and then the other as he went on, his eyes wide when he reached the end of his incredibly familiar sounding description. "Right," he murmured after a moment's pause, sounding thoroughly unimpressed, "You're hysterical, Greengrass. Really." "I'm not trying to be funny, I'm just saying…" Taking another sip of his beer, Asher ran his thumb around the rim of the bottle and gave Jacob a wink. "Come on, we've worked together what for how long now? Two years? And we barely talk. We should loosen up. Get to know each other." Jacob's expression soured and he glared at Asher, "No, seriously. I get that it's an office pastime to see how pissed off people can get me, but this whole…" He waved a hand between them, his lip curling into a sneer as he did, "Pretending to hit on the old man so you can laugh when he takes the bait bit? It's run its course. Find a new joke, Greengrass." "Not a joke but…" Asher rolled his eyes and slipped off his stool. It was clear Jacob was in one of his moods, and the younger Critter didn't want to deal with it when he was supposed to be having fun. "Fine. See you around." Whatever, Asher knew Jacob still had a soft spot for him. That whole grumpy thing had to be an act — no one actually disliked Asher, right? |