Who: Harry and Ghost!James Where: the Potter home in Godric's Hollow. When: BACKDATED to Monday night. What: Father and son chit-chattery. Rating: PG-13 for starters, probably. Status: IC/OOC Logged.
(10:27:11 PM) Kassie: So, Harry is on desk duty and house arrest aside from work as part of the parole. For James's purposes, Ginny is getting home late and Harry's ... moping is a good word for it. But mostly he's just shuffling around Godric's Hollow, brooding and going, "I want a drink" but not being able to have one, since Ginny pitched all the booze and put up anti-alcohol wards on the house.
(10:28:38 PM) Bree (Marius, James): OK, well, James wouldn't bother haunting Harry. He'd just appear out of the blue and say Hello. (10:28:48 PM) Bree (Marius, James): He's going to try not to tell him off too soon.
(10:29:41 PM) Kassie: Which would make Harry react not unlike AlSev did -- at least in that he'd be like, "Wait what... OOOOMG GHOST" for a couple seconds.
(10:30:13 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "Yeah, I get that a lot. But well-- I've been watching. I was trying to stay out of it Harry, but I think it's time you had some fathering." (10:30:21 PM) Bree (Marius, James): James tries hard not to smirk as he says this.
(10:31:09 PM) Kassie: Harry: *something growly and passive-aggressive about how he hardly needs it now because he's not allowed to see the kids anyway. Part of the pre-trial business and all that.*
(10:32:04 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "Nothing to do with fathering THEM right now. I mean YOU need some fathering. I realize this IS a bit late but being dead isn't as simple as you think and time does funny things. (10:32:15 PM) Bree (Marius, James): But I'm here now. So why do you think everything is so cocked up?
(10:42:28 PM) Kassie: Harry: Well let's see... I spent one year happy but can't remember it because I was a baby, spent the next ten starved and locked in a bloody cupboard and treated like a damn House Elf, promptly got dragged into a world where everybody knew me because I did something I can't remember -- and not even that, they expect me to be some... just really bloody amazing when there's nothing amazing about me and all I want to be is normal. My mentor, I guess, is some old bloke who might as well say "Jabberwocky" all the time for all the fat lot of good he does me, meanwhile he lets Snape kick me around just because you're my dad and he hated you. And bad shit ALWAYS follows around after me and the only two people who don't treat me like some FREAK -- I want to know about my parents, but first I find out that one of their best friends is an escaped mass murderer who sold them out, then I find out he's not but he has to run abroad because he's an escaped convict, and the other one can't stay and teach me because he's a bloody werewolf...
(10:42:33 PM) Kassie: Harry: Then I have to do the Triwizard tournament, which I have NO INTEREST IN because the crazy in the basement wanted to revive Voldemort, oh, and I got to watch Cedric Diggory, who never hurt ANYONE IN HIS LIFE, die because he was a GOOD PERSON AND PLAYED FAIR. Only he wouldn't have been with me if I hadn't told him to take the Triwizard Cup with me! And everyone told me to just GET OVER WATCHING HIS MURDER. Then Sirius died, and Dumbledore spent a year naffing around instead of preparing me to be the Chosen One, then it turned out I had part of Voldemort's soul inside me, then Ginny wanted to get married right after I had to BLOODY KILL SOMEONE and Rita Skeeter's on me THROUGH ALL THIS, and Ginny doesn't try to understand when things don't go her way, and the kids act like they should just have everything handed to them, and how, exactly, is everything NOT going to be COCKED UP?
(10:44:54 PM) Bree (Marius, James): James burst out laughing. He couldn't help it. "Oh for fucking fuck-- When you put it like that I'd say everything's probably about right. You can't hit your kids Harry, but if there's anyone who deserves to beat the shit out of something, it's you, kiddo."
(10:49:07 PM) Kassie: Harry: *face in hands* It's not like I meant to start fucking hitting them -- they just... They don't understand the kind of world we live in, or the expectations there are for them, and... you'd think they would! The media nearly found out Ginny was pregnant with James before I did! It isn't like it's hard to understand -- but they don't understand working for anything either. Or doing something for someone other than themselves, and *hands nearly over mouth* Ginny says it's the Firewhiskey. I say that's bloody rubbish.
(10:52:25 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "I did some crazy shit while drinking there near the end. War will do that to you I think. Everything just hurts. Thinking hurts, buying groceries hurts, you're always wondering who the next one dead is going to be, and half the time you hope it's fucking you because then at least you won't have to worry about it anymore, and the firewhiskey numbs that. Makes it easier to take somehow. But it also convinces you to sneak into Hogwarts, sweet talk the fat lady, and try to cheat on your wife with McGonagal. So ummm... There's a point here...
(10:53:44 PM) Bree (Marius, James): Right. The point is that Firewhiskey changes what you'd do and what you wouldn't ordinarily do, because honestly, who wants to fuck someone who wears plaid unders? But at some point life is shit and you have to decide if you'd rather have the whiskey or your family cause you can't have both." (10:54:02 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "Only one thing can numb that pain at a time."
(11:00:57 PM) Kassie: Harry: But I wasn't drunk the first time, dad. Not even a little. And the whiskey... keeps -- kept it going, made it seem like less than it was, but -- the first time, it was James. And he couldn't have been that old at all, maybe six, at the most. And I just... came home from yet another day of seeing all the awful shit that goes on in war, only there's not a war, so why are people still doing the awful shit. It'd been like that for three months; a bunch of Death Eater wannabes, calling themselves the True Believers... they were running around, terrorising everyone. And just... Lily was sleeping, Ginny was off ... not here, I think she was with Hermione, Al and James were playing with these Quidditch action figures, and Al wanted to play with Krum but James didn't want to let him. So they fought over it for a bit, I told James to share with his brother, they just kept going and going and he wouldn't listen, and I grabbed him up by the wrist and hit him across the face. ...And just... you say shit like that's never going to happen again, and then it does, because they won't listen and you know what's best for them, but they don't try to understand because 'parent' means 'enemy' and... it's all completely fucked.
(11:06:19 PM) Bree (Marius, James): James nodded. "But you know it's wrong. You have all these expectations for them but you can't even keep up with your own, kiddo. And here's the thing about expectations in the first place. They're shit. Expectations are what fucking ruined Sirius's life. They're everything I ever hoped you'd be spared from, but I get killed, and suddenly your life is fucking over run with them. James Sirius doesn't want to be an auror? SO FUCKING WHAT. Albus Severus wants to fuck men? What the fuck do you care if it ends up in the papers? It doesn't matter! (11:07:14 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "So between trying to please everyone and trying to get this perfect life for yourself, you've lost everything that could have finally turned out all right. It's not your fault, but you're going to have to deal with the consequences."
(11:12:05 PM) Kassie: Harry: What's the point? My sons have made it pretty obvious what they think of me and they want nothing to do with me, my wife has hardly wanted to stay together for any reason but "we can't get divorced, everyone will know" and the only reason she isn't at the Burrow, or Ron and Hermione's, or Percy's, or someone else's is that the Wizengamot says someone has to be with me and she doesn't trust Ron not to let me drink or try to see the kids, and ... I don't even know what Lily Luna thinks of me or the rest of the family, for that matter -- and oddly enough, I haven't talked to the person I want to talk to most because I'm still fucking terrified of him after he terrorised my childhood, even after I accidentally set a snake on him. ...I'm just... I'm no better than the people I've been hunting, dad. I'm better off in prison.
(11:16:28 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "I think you might be right." James hold up a hand so Harry doesn't protest. "But that doesn't mean I want to see you there. I like my grandsons a lot, and I hate that you ever laid a hand on them, but you're my son. If you end up in prison I won't ever leave your side if you want me around-- Sirius will understand-- and if you don't end up in prison then we'll see what we can do about getting your life straightened out. And I'll go with you if you want to talk to Severus. He won't be too cranky about me being there, I promise. But no matter what, you need to call your lawyers off your sons. It's not right Harry. You're the parent and even if they're being ridiculous little twats, you protect them."
(11:21:36 PM) Kassie: Harry: Azkaban's not even that bad anymore; Kingsley called the Dementors off as one of his first acts as Minister. Right along with increasing werewolf rights. ...I do not want to see Severus ever again, thanks. It's bad enough that Al would rather call him father than me and... they've got fucking Lestrange. They're going to nail me to the wall; it's not often that Patrice Lestrange loses. The best we can hope is that I'm not there for my entire bloody life so things can get straightened out.
(11:27:19 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "You could try and offer a deal. They don't hate you Harry. Well, James Sirius doesn't hate you. AlSev is a bit of a firecracker, but I think if you took responsibility for your actions eventually he wouldn't hate you. And it's not as if you killed anyone. You hit your sons. It's SHIT, but you could have done worse. It's hard as fuck to balance not lecturing you with not condoning what you've done, but I love you, Harry, and that means I don't want things to be this hard. So what do you want? If you could fix your life right now, would you still want to be married to Ginny? Would you want to be in your sons lives even if it meant you had to accept them as they were? Would you want your ghostfather to go back to his fucking grave and leave you alone?"
(11:34:57 PM) Kassie: Harry: Albus was always the quiet one until recently, really. James and Lily were loud and undeniably Gryffindor, and Al... had the odd outburst here and there, but mostly it was crying or anxiety or something like that. The temper of his feels ridiculously new. ...If I could fix my life... I probably wouldn't want to be married to Ginny, no, because we both hate it, and the kids all hate it, and like I said the only reason we haven't split up is because it'll be on the front page everywhere. ...I want to be in their lives. And I don't want to just be the big bad wolf that made everything shit for them either. And... you can stay, if you want to. Your suggestions are a lot more helpful than Ron's or... anyone else's really. Usually I'd be getting the tough suggestions from Hermione, but... she hasn't looked at me the same since this broke, and I can't say I blame her or that I'd do differently if it were Ron smacking Rosie and Hugo around.
(11:41:08 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "Who gives a fuck if it's on all the papers? At worst it could last, what? A month? Dramatics fade, people get bored if they've got nothing new to read about, and life moves on. It's the human condition, or so Moony would tell you if he were here.
I'm kind of glad you don't want to run me off. I don't just love you Harry, I like you. You have a lot to offer the world that has nothing to do with being a golden boy, or the chosen one, or whatever other shit people always hand you. And what you just said you want? That's possible. It's not even that difficult if you're willing to be patient, and I'll stick around any time you want to talk. I've got a journal now and everything, compliments of your youngest son. And as an added bonus, this Rita Skeeter woman is going to regret ever fucking with you," James added with a huge smile. "The only thing worse than a pissed off Marauder is a pissed off Marauder that can walk through walls and doesn't need to sleep."
(11:49:39 PM) Kassie: Harry: I haven't looked into the journal things. Tried once, peeked at Pepper's when he was off terrorising the twitchy one in the basement. Saw Albus and Scorpius and... I know it's ridiculous and terrible, but I have always hated the fact that Albus runs around with that Malfoy trash. I've said a lot of things about them I haven't really meant -- like... being friends with a Malfoy is tantamount to encouraging Death Eater revivalists -- but just... it's so bloody ridiculous-looking. And of course the papers were right on it as soon as someone went, "Oh look, Albus Potter and Scorpius Malfoy don't hate each other like their fathers did, isn't that weird." ...Do your worst to Rita for me, won't you? Just... I know there's been a lot of shit I haven't handled well, but it's not like I liked her telling the entire world that my older son's a porn star and the younger one's bloody anorexic or... whatever the right word for it is.
(11:53:51 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "I will. That bitch may not get a good night's sleep for the rest of her life-- and Harry-- actually, you know what? I think we've gone through enough for tonight, so no more lectures. We've got the rest of your life to get to know each other, yeah? So please, tomorrow, call your lawyers off your sons... I'm not going to come haunting you if you don't, but you know it's the right thing to do. You're not going to change them so you might as well take them for what they are... though I've got to admit-- didn't know about the porn star thing." James laughs again. "He's a great kid though. You did something right with them. They're funny, and clever as hell. You want me to stick around while you sleep, or head off so you can talk to your wife when she gets home?"
(11:54:51 PM) Kassie: Harry: Head off for now, but... don't be a stranger, I guess?
(11:55:42 PM) Bree (Marius, James): "Not a chance. I'll check on you every night, and I'm never far away if you need me. Night, kiddo."