Showcase Showdown (Susa-no-O / 2005)
Burbank, California. Land of television. Land of dreams. Though, as it turned out, not if those dreams involved anything other than getting drunk and staggering back to the Motel 6 at 4 a.m. The same three bars had been the scene of as much debauchery as you could summon in a run-down section of southern California. Gwydyon had thought there would be all manner of women, or 'bitches' as the vernacular of the day called them. Susa-no-O had been agreeable enough at first. Over the past three days Gwydyon had watched the Japanese god's mood steadily deteriorate. From bad to worse to almost homicidal. Burbank was officially a bust, much as Portland and Oklahoma City had been. If they didn't find something to do, they were going to descend into real apathy, and then Susa-no-O was going to murder something with his bare hands or a weapon so grotesque in nature that it did not bear description or use.
That was when he found him.
Of all the places in all the seven hells called continents on this, the miserable green rock of creation, Burbank was the chosen settlement of no less than Bob Barker. Of course, those of more ancient times knew him by his various other names. Melichor the Destroyer. Ba'al. And a host of other monikers which the demon had used in his travels across Europe, Asia and the sub-continent. Gwydyon remembered tracking him across Italy and through Greece, down into Egypt and all throughout Africa. Susa-no-O had recalled similar experiences, and in a dark mood the Japanese god had set forth the challenge that Gwydyon had imagined. Together they were going to confront Melichor the Destroyer, 'Bob Barker', and murder him in front of his live television audience. For the crimes he had committed and would commit the foul creature known as the host of The Price Is Right would no longer be allowed to walk the earth, breath the air of humane creatures.
It had not come about in so simple a way, of course. After the fourth woman - whom Susa-no-O refused to identify by name, instead using numbers or a form of groping - asked if their swords were real, Susa-no-O had angrily left the establishment. The walk home, along the highway, had been something of a downer. Neither one of them had said anything. Later, after the third episode of I Love Lucy, Susa-no-O had been heard to murmur "I hate you." in a grumbling voice before rolling over and going to sleep. Gwydyon engaged the vibrating bed machine, much to his comrade's discomfort, and considered his options. Either fight Susa-no-O in a drunken rage, or find a channel for his friend's murderous energy. And to an extent his own restless energy. It was then he'd decided. They were here, and so was Melichor. A demon to fight, and the utter loss of a trip to stave off.
Sounded like fun.
The studios of The Price Is Right were like so many abandoned palaces that the demon had left behind him. Multi-colored, filled with beautiful women - all of whom detested every gulp of their air which he sucked down into his demonic gullet. Gwydyon could feel his blood boiling before they were even close enough to hear the monstrosity. Twisted cords and cables like so many tentacles of Melichor's favored pet, the Dehodroan, writhed at their feet when Gwydyon and Susa began to work their way backstage. There were men there. Men in headsets, obviously helping Melichor broadcast his message of greed and tyranny around the world. Gwydyon's murmured words in Welsh kept them safe from harm. At last the time was upon them. Holding the sword aloft, Gwydyon checked through a gap in the flimsy stagedrops and then looked to his partner. Both of them were pleasantly buzzing from the alcohol they'd ingested at breakfast.
"Remember the right hand. Melichor feasted upon thousands of souls they said, by ripping them from the body with his bare hand. If you see it coming toward you, go on the defensive and let me try him. Work together, and watch out for the Dehodroan. They say it can sneak up on you."
Susa-no-O only nodded impatiently.
They were going to do it.
Gwydyon felt a stir of adrenaline in his chest when called out the words of power. From the blade of the sword lightning sprang - arcing wildly around the backstage area, setting fire to the stage drops and cracking like thunder across the entire studio. Shrieks rang out at the first bolt, but there was one set of feet that did not move. One body that did not hesitate to stand its ground. Even without the horns wreathed in flame, or the dead flesh dripping from his teeth of hell's blaze, Gwydyon could see the menace in Bob Barker. As he and Susa-no-O stepped through the fire onto the stage Gwydyon could feel the menace radiating from the ancient creature who thirsted for blood and virgins. Susa-no-O sharpened his sword by annihilating the Plinko! stand, and then Gwydyon roared into the chaos - his voice loud and commanding, to be heard about the riotous din.
"Bob Barker!" he bellowed. "It's Showcase Showdown."