Noah (hellboundlife) wrote in commandhq, @ 2018-05-13 00:46:00 |
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There weren’t many kind things that Cal could say about Limbo or the Regiment but it was nice to have food on tap whenever you wanted or needed it, especially to somebody who was used to going hungry on more than one occasion. He’d grabbed a selection ranging from barbequed ribs to some sort of chow mein thing that looked like it might be hot because Cal did enjoy spicy food when and if he was ever able to get his hands on it. He figured they could hang out in his room because Cal always felt more comfortable in his room than he did in anyone else’s, could say he liked being in his own space and having his own stuff around him. “Make yourself at home,” he muttered to Cass as he pushed open his door and strayed into the room, container of food clasped in his hand before he settled it on the nearby table in order for him to shrug out of his jacket down to his dark t-shirt. Cal was happy that he and Cass were hanging out as he definitely hadn’t spent a lot of time with the other guy one on one. Cassidy had grabbed himself some grilled chicken and a salad- with all the options he went healthy. But it had been good for him. He’d gotten to a healthy weight and was actually looking quite fit not buff, but fit. More like his natural dancer body style. He entered the room wearing a dark grey t-shirt that may have grown a tad tight amid the formation of his six pack and a pair of jeans that Cal may not appreciate but others could because they made his ass look good. “You might regret that offer Rocket.” He chuckled. “I said that to Sas and now I have a perma-roommate.” Cas was teasing, he didn’t mind Tammy sleeping in his room. He’d always been very protective of her. Taking a seat on the couch, it did marvel him how every room really did have the same basic layout. “Pretty sure you don’t mind it as much as you claim to,” Cal pointed out as he toed out of his boots and then made himself comfortable on his bed where he began to open up the different containers of the food he’d selected. When they’d first been taken by the Regiment he hadn’t eaten a thing, hadn’t wanted to give them the satisfaction and also really suspicious about whether or not they might put shit into the food to keep them under control and compliant. Now however he ate what he could and when he could because having free access to food was a truly amazing thing and not something to be taken for granted. “You doing alright?” Slipping out of his own shoes he pulled his legs up under him on the couch. “As well as can be expected with a Soldier as your new Handler.” Cas commented. “Hate the weapons training. But at least no ones realized how to exactly use my powers yet. So that’s nice.” Cassidy had confided in Cal early on that he’d been scared of his powers and their potential for bad. When they started the ‘terrorist’ activity Calvin had been respectful and never asked him to do anything that would hurt anyone, which he’d always appreciated. “How about you? Staying out of trouble?” His tone wasn’t one of criticism, it was playful. He didn’t know the reason Cal had lashed out at the other Agent, but he’d already said his piece on him acting out and being put in solitary. “Working you hard huh?” Cal asked as he cracked into his ribs and took a bite out of them, not caring about the fact he got sauce all over his fingers or it wasn’t the most civilised way to eat. He’d eaten with his hands for such a long time that some habits did in fact die hard. Cal also guarded his food even though he had no reason to anymore he hunched over it and looked as though he might growl like a dog with food guarding issues might if somebody came too close. He knew exactly how scared Cassidy was of his powers and what he could do with them so hopefully this new handler appreciated that fact or Cal had no issue with telling him so. He snorted quietly. “Mmhm, ever since that incident in the cafeteria I have been on my best behaviour.” Of course why he had done that wasn’t just Cal being Cal but rather at the bequest of Alejandro who told him and Sandy to go rattle cages. It was after all what they were really good at. “Of course that thing in the cafeteria wasn’t what it looked like,” he shared as he caught a sauce covered thumb in his mouth. “One of the only nice things about this place.” He lifted his shirt and flashed his abs, for the first time in his life Cassidy was fit and healthy. That ‘always try to look on the positive side of things’ thing of his was still in full force. That ‘morale’ lifter, even though in a place like Limbo it was hard… especially with so many of them split up they way they were. He picked up a piece of his chicken and took a bite. His habits weren’t as survival based as Cal’s. Yes, he was used to the no utensils as well, and defending his food, but he’d frequently given most of his meal to the girls when they were still hungry so he wasn’t as defensive as his friend. “That’s good.” He said with a nod. “It’s bad enough we’re all separated out.” Well, save for him and Sas. “I have to admit I miss those nights when we all passed out on the couches together.” Being close and comfortable in a group. He never left on those nights. Well normally he couldn’t as Paige or someone was normally laying on him. “Most people here aren’t what they look like.” He chuckled. Cal arched an eyebrow when Cassidy flashed him, fairly certain whoever he was sleeping with was more appreciative than Cal himself. He wasn’t about to rain on Cassidy’s parade, not when it was clear he was happy with being fit and healthy. “You aren’t the only one,” he shared as he popped a barbeque sauce covered thumb into his mouth and cleaned it off. “Mm, not what I meant.” He shook his head. “I mean, why I picked that fight. Not what it looked like.” And it hadn’t been spur of the moment either, it had in fact been planned and his target picked out a long time before the altercation itself. He cracked into the noodles. “Didn’t just go off on that guy ‘cause.” Cas arched a brow. “So, what was it then?” He asked with a seriousness. “I mean you’re ‘Rocket’ for a reason but risking solitary and hurting the girls like that seemed anti-you. Especially over nothing.” If the other guy had hurt or threatened one of them it would have been understandable but from what he’d heard it was just a small infraction that caused a drastic reaction. That had rubbed him the wrong way- which he’d vocalized at the time. “Alejandro told Hotshot and I to rattle cages,” Cal shared as he took a mouthful of noodles. “I figured it wouldn’t hurt to work out how far shit needed to go before they resorted to the implants in our neck. Course I had to create a situation where it might be necessary and that’s how that came about.” He wasn’t being stupid for the sake of being stupid. There had been a point to it but fat lot of good it had done them because it sure as shit didn’t feel like it was worth everything that happened. He shifted slightly in his seat as he processed that info. He could understand why Wings hadn’t roped him into that plan… he wasn’t one of the fighters. Though he couldn’t deny the feeling he had that had been amplified since Scotty’s arrival… that he was on the outside of the Outsiders. Well not all, he kept reminding himself he had Tammy, but he’d known Cal and Sandy so much longer and just felt as if he were falling away. Not that he’d say anything about it. “I see.” He said, starting on his salad. “At least there was a reason.” That was it? Seriously? Cassidy didn’t even want to know more about the fact they were trying to figure a way out of this hellhole. Not even an apology for calling him out for being stupid? Wow. Clearly this place was suiting him or whatever if he had zero interest in knowing anything more about what was going on. Cal figured he’d leave it at that then, if Cassidy wanted anything else he’d need to ask. A further mouthful of noodles followed and Cal poked at something that didn’t look like it belonged in noodles. “Any other things Wings asked of you two-“ That he’d been left out of. Cas shook his head and closed up his food. He hated that feeling, of being on the outside. It made him feel like he was back in the foster house he’d ran away from. Where everything happened around him and he was just furniture. Maybe it had always been that way and he just never saw it. He had spent much of their time together spending afternoons performing in the city to make money for their family prior to Alejandro (and even after because he didn’t like the idea of Alejandro giving them handouts). Maybe he always was alone in the family, but he was so busy ‘working’ he never noticed. Shit. Cal’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly as Cassidy closed up his food when previously he had been enjoying it and who would stop eating food when it was so easily and readily available? The things that Wings had asked of Cal and Sandy had nothing to do with Cassidy and his standing in the Outsiders, it just made sense to ask those who were the “troublemakers” and the ones who weren’t as afraid of consequence to make the wrong moves. Not that Cal intended on doing that again, not after seeing what it had done to Sandy and the others. Cal would happily and readily throw himself onto the fire if it meant the others didn’t get burned. “You alright?” He asked, arching an eyebrow. “Honestly? No.” Cas admitted, reluctantly. “I mean I will be… I guess I just…” God it sounded stupid, he knew it. “I just miss how things were. They don’t feel the same here.” He scratched at the back of his neck. “I feel like we’re drifting.” That was a good way of putting it, right? Well, shit. Cal decided that perhaps food could and should wait so he like Cassidy closed up his food and placed it to one side. “They aren’t the same here,” Cal agreed. “Dynamic’s off. Different and not in a good way. Feels like we spend more time arguing with each other than actually doing what we do best and that’s sticking together.” He had been feeling that for a while and he’d also been feeling a little… distant from Alejandro, but the fact the other man was never around didn’t help. That and he didn’t seem to be as invested in getting the hell out of this place as Cal and he knew Sandy and Scotty were. “I’m not different though,” Cal pointed out. “I’m still Rocket. I don’t buy into any of this bullshit but I get the feeling that some of us do more than others. Not gonna lie to you, Domino, but I’ve been feeling a lot of distance from you.” “I’m not buying into anything.” He said almost defensive as if Cal had been talking about him. “I just don’t want to get locked up or sent away. Or worse.” Cassidy sighed. “I was trying to follow Alejandro’s recommendation- of course I had no idea he was saying something else in private to you.” His nose wrinkled slightly. He hated that feeling of jealousy. “And it’s not like I haven’t reached out. But I’m not the one having secret meetings.” Okay maybe he was a bit more heated that normal. Something that was very unlike him. At least his voice hadn’t started to rise yet. “And now that Scotty is back.” He bit hit words back. Cal was still as Cassidy lashed out and the only obvious sign that he wasn't overly amused by being the focus of Cassidy's ire was how he shifted and laced his fingers together, gaze dark and steady on the other man. "Not my issue," he pointed out. "That whole saying one thing to you and another to me and Sandy is Alejandro's issue. Don't put that on me. And honestly? Less you knew the better 'cause it's that whole being able to tell them you don't know shit and being able to mean it. Hell, Sandy didn't even know what I'd done until after I was out from solitary." And then he mentioned Scotty. "What about Scotty?" But he had shared with her. Maybe he should confront Alejandro about things. “Nothing.” Cas shook his head. He shouldn’t have brought the other boy up. “Never mind. Scotty is just Scotty.” Wasn't what Cal was doing now, sharing? Pretty sure he'd just told Cassidy everything he'd told Sandy. Taken him longer sure but he had just told him what was going on when he could have continued to hold it close to his chest. "Don't do that," Cal said with a shake of his head. "You brought him up so say whatever it was you were thinking else it's gonna fester." Cas sighed. “You know he… was never as close to the rest of us.” Despite all the years they’d lived together. “He probably would have been happy if it were just you and Sandy and him.” And that’s what Cas worried would happen. “They’ve already tried to pull us apart, put us on separate teams. Send some of us on missions, train at different times… at least some of us. And now that Scotty’s back…” His eyes cast to the floor. He felt very vulnerable for the moment as he spoke, his voice quiet, no longer angry but scared. “I don’t want you to choose him over us.” Cal sighed when it became apparent what Cassidy had been feeling this whole time and he kicked himself for not noticing it sooner, but then nobody could accuse him of being the most emotionally intelligent Outsiders. He got to his feet and closed the distance between himself and his fellow Outsider, coming to sit next to him before he just tugged Cassidy into a hug, encircling him in his hands and lifting a hand to rest on the back of his head. “It’s all of you or nothing at all,” he stated very clearly. Cas closed his eyes and returned the hug. Yea, He’d never been as physical with Cal than others but it still felt nice, that warmth of familial love. There was more, how he didn’t feel useful anymore, but for that moment… he just absorbed the connection. |