InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "i was there for you..."

tenthten (tenthten) wrote in colligo_threads,
@ 2009-09-10 20:16:00

Entry tags:

!open, castiel

WHO: The human Doctor and OPEN
WHAT: Wandering the city
WHEN: Tonight
WHERE: The city streets
RATING: TBA
STATUS: Incomplete

John Smith wasn't particularly paying attention to where he was going as he talked to himself.

"Did it go 'We are all of us travelers lost' or 'All of us are travelers lost'? I can never remember."

He shook his head, finally looking around him and trying to remember if he knew this area. It wasn't a particularly big concern in the end. There were worse things than finding his way home. If all else failed, he had the Network to get it from or ask Rose where he was. There were larger matters to be concerned with.

Such as Donna.

He had taken a gamble there, and her reaction hadn't been what he expected. The warnings didn't bode well for him. She seemed wary which mean she would be watching him. The question now was if she had told the others. So much for bonding. There were times that he forgot the simple things such as holding a conversation correctly and not bringing up inappropriate things.

"Tremulous skeins of destiny flutter so... what was that word?"

John sighed. This wasn't working. It could always be worse, but this was supposed to be different.

"I'll remember it eventually. I read it long ago," he said to himself.

What's done was done. Now it was about damage control. Chewing on a fingernail, he sighed.

"Now I can't even remember where I read it."

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heavenslancer
2009-09-11 07:18 am UTC (link)

Castiel spend much his time walking the city. He hoped if he became familiar with it's architecture it's citizens would also seem less distant, less foreign.

This was his home now, and maybe for a very long time. The time for running away was over. However, this realisation had given him no new ability to connect with people and, apart for limited contact with Dean and Aziraphale he was largely alone.

Angels were not meant to be alone, they were not build for it.
Castiel's eyes scanned the pavement without direction.

That was when he heard the man. Castiel looked up.
A thin man with messy brown hair was chewing his fingernail and speaking though he appeared to be alone.

This was curious and Castiel was compelled to approach. He looked around but could see no one and no communications device.
"To whom do you speak?" he asked the man softly.

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tenthten
2009-09-11 07:49 am UTC (link)

Had the meta-crisis creature known anything of Castiel, he would have been vastly amused given his talk of travelers lost. Two seemed to have found each other in a city where both were held against their will.

Denied that knowledge, he merely blink at Castiel at first, caught gnawing his fingernails. His hand dropped down quickly, all too aware that it was one of his tells that he was slipping. Each had already been bitten down to the quick. It was Castiel's soft inquiry that fought down a more violent or aggressive reaction at being caught mid-soliloquy that a shout would have brought about.

"To whom?"

The thing that was currently calling himself John Smith glanced about himself thoughtfully. A quick grin came to his lips as he raked a hand through his hair, setting it into more disarray than it had been before. There was a sheepishness about his smile as he shook his head.

"I wasn't talk to anyone but myself. It's a bad habit that I developed a long time ago. Sorry about that."

Denied companionship or outer stimulus, John had learned to create his own. Getting used to other living and breathing creatures about him was a task he was still tackling.

"I'm John Smith," he said, offering the angel a hand. To his eyes, Castiel was the same as the others. Perhaps there was a bit more of a glimmer there, but being half-human, he did tend to miss things.

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heavenslancer
2009-09-11 08:12 am UTC (link)

"It is not an action that required apology," Castiel said evenly.
He was slowly learning to read human body language yet this man's actions were so quick and disconnected he could not follow them.

Castiel stared at the hand for a moment before seeming to come to a decision and taking it.

"Castiel," said the angel. As he made contact he felt something, something curious. Something ancient something tied to the fabric of the universe. Something like him.

"John," Castiel repeated the name. He withdrew his hand, staring at the other man with great interest.
He was suddenly bristling with questions but he did not know how to ask when he wanted to know. Instead he said, "Have you been here for some time?"

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tenthten
2009-09-11 09:47 pm UTC (link)

"Castiel? I always thought that was a place in Switzerland. They had their Saint Greg, or what that George... one of them on their flags. Contrary to what they say, their chocolate and clocks aren't all that outstanding. The fellow I bought them from did seem a bit disreputable now that I think about it."

The whole time he spoke, he kept cheerfully shaking Castiel's hand until the angel withdrew it. Get him started on a subject, and chances were that instead of going from Point A to B, he would end up taking his unwilling listener through Wormhole Z to every other point but the one he had been aiming for. Little wonder the TARDIS rarely got where he meant to be going, his red one at least.

"John works for now. Theta tends to get too many blank looks and questions. I don't mind the latter, but it's the first that tends to worry me. I can see them going down their mental lists of people that need arrested or owes them money with that name. 'Theta' stands out. 'John' blends in nicely," he said with a grin.

He paused for a beat, lost on some inner thought track.

"That and no one really gets the joke."

Shrugging to himself, he moved on from that quick enough and to the question put to him by Castiel. His nose wrinkled as he waved a hand dismissively. "Time is a weird thing. It's like a big ball of wib - wait, I said that already to someone. You're not her. I haven't been here long, no. I live somewhere about here. What about you? Are you from here or like one of us that were brought here?"

That seeming of being borderline nervous or simply not focused came to a stop when the question left his lips, dark eyes fastening on Castiel's face.

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heavenslancer
2009-09-11 10:51 pm UTC (link)

Castiel tried to follow the man's conversation. He knew what a clock was, had a vague awareness that you ate chocolate. He found Switzerland an especially fine example of his Father's work.
"Saint Nicholas is the patron of Switzerland. George is the patron of England," Castiel pronounced, probably missing the point. "However, there is a place in Switzerland that bears my name."

Castiel felt a little like he was watching Dean in one of his rants. This was largely what that felt like. It was best to just wait for it to be over and not step into it's path.

"Then I will use John, if that is your wish." Castiel did not see what a name had to do with blending in. The name you were given was the correct one though he was used to being with many names and understood people were wont to favour one over another.

"Time is easy to understand," Castiel said. "It is not "weird", it is merely a fact of existence." Time. That was what Castiel was feeling. Time was clinging to this man, faintly but differently to how it may another human. He was more confused than before.

"I am not from here," Castiel said, his voice a little steely. He was aware many of the humans here were hollow beings and he was rather put out at having been mistaken for one. "I had no choice about coming here. A worse time for my departure could hardly be arranged," he scowled.

"I would leave in a moment given the chance." He settled a bit. "If I may ask, what was your mission, your profession, before you came here? Do you have something vital to return to?" Castiel was not usually one to ask personal information of a human but both his circumstance and this man were highly unusual.

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tenthten
2009-09-12 01:29 am UTC (link)

"I thought so," John said with a rather pleased air. So what if the other eighty percent hadn't been correct? The main point had been. Of course what exactly had been the main point could easily switch so that he was right. It was good to be half-human somedays.

Then there was the mention of 'time being easy' which got full attention from him. Castiel had just hit upon the one subject that he would talk on and be relatively 'safe' unlike others that might nudge some buried memory or firing point for the instability within.

"I suppose you could look at it that way. Facts can always be changed though. Take Earth for example. At one time, it was a fact to some that the stars revolved around their planet instead of the other way around. It was a fact it was flat. Then again, there are those that think if enough people believe it, then things will become true. Dreams of a thousand cats and all. If people could get over that time isn't linear they might have some understanding. That's when you have to bring up paradoxes to confuse them all over again."

The pause this time as he swung his thoughts back on track was thankfully short and quick enough for him to catch the note in Castiel's voice. Interest had him again. Most didn't seem as tense about being here as this one did. "Doesn't seem that many of us did."

His mission? A couple answers sprang to mind immediately. Shoot Jack Harkness daily. Shoot the Doctor in the face so they weren't sharing the same looks. Well, he'd settle for stabbing or poisoning on the last since sneaking up on a Time Lord was so much harder than anyone might think. Poisoning would work either. He'd think of something. Trip Ianto down a flight of stairs. He actually liked Ianto, but the whole getting shot in the back by the Welshman just inches from his TARDIS back in his world deal had left him needing to even things up. Stairs wouldn't be fatal or so he figured. Drop Owen Harp-

"You see," he began, scratching the back of his neck. "That's..."

Profession? Torchwood's Most Wanted (or Most Immediately Wanted When the Traveler Was Making Himself Scarce), High Score Holder in the Kill-Jack-Harkness Contest, Person Who Proved Torchwood's Supply of Powdered Non-Dairy Creamer Made a Hell of a Fire?

"That's complicated. Really complicated."

The idea of something vital back home, he began digging through his coat until he dragged a picture out and offered it to Castiel with a cheerful grin. Oh yes, he did.

"Isn't she lovely?"

The picture was of a rather ill-cared for garden with a bright red Glasgow police box in the middle. The human Doctor sighed happily just looking at his TARDIS.

"What were you doing that made it such a terrible moment for you to leave? Where are you from anyways?"

An out of nowhere question but that bright gaze was fixed intensely on Castiel again, sharpness through clouds.

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heavenslancer
2009-09-13 09:14 am UTC (link)

Castiel frowned a little at John Smith. "You are, in part, correct. As things change their nature of being, their Truth, changes with them.
However, Truth is not mutable not decided by humans, no matter how many believe in something. A mistaken belief cannot become a Truth. Only my Father can create a Truth."

He took the photograph of the wooden box in the garden. He saw the way the plants had began to reclaim the land from the structures around them. He always admired his Father's work.

"It is beautiful," he said as he handed the photo back. The man did not reveal anything of his past and Castiel did not press. If he was not to be privy to that information so be it.

Then the John asked about his own past. He was the first human he had met here to do so and Castiel was mildly surprised at the interest.

"I arrived here from Earth, America, but it is not where I am from. At the moment of my leaving I was attempting to stop the rise of Lucifer, I was helping my charge to halt the apocalypse. I was awaiting my destruction." Those heavy and ominous words drew no great change in tone or expression from the angel. He simply level his eyes at the human Doctor, the faintest hint of sadness in them.

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tenthten
2009-09-15 02:17 am UTC (link)

John Smith blinked.

And blinked again for good measure.

"Oh."

On the good side, this Castiel person had complimented his TARDIS (which really was beautiful he thought as he tucked the picture away in his pocket again) so he did deserve a bit more consideration. In his travels, Castiel wasn't the first person he had met that claimed to be trying to prevent world-wide destruction. He had often done it himself, or rather the Doctor had. John was more the one to give an already rolling ball a good kick to make it go faster.

"Lucifer? I read about him once. Some sort of comic book, I think. Don't remember a Castiel in it though."

John Smith tilted his head thoughtfully and frowned at both the words and the note in Castiel's voice.

"Well, that just doesn't make sense. Who stands around and waits to be destroyed? You're doing it all wrong if that's what you've been up to. Really now. Circle of life and all that. You can't just wait around to be destroyed. Takes all the surprise out of it. 'Rage, rage, against the dying of the light' or something like that."

He paused for a moment.

"Why were you waiting instead of planning a way out or helping your companion?"

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heavenslancer
2009-09-15 05:58 am UTC (link)

Castiel's eyes went very dark, his face settled into a frown that was layered in pain.
When he spoke his voice was almost steady.

"I was helping my charge. I sent where he needed to be. The archangels had come to try and stop him. I sent him away and I stayed behind to hold them back."

His eyes dropped. "I did not with to be destroyed. There was no other way. I left it so late. It was all I could do."

He looked up at John. "You will not read of it in any book. It is their shame. They disobeyed and I disobeyed them but not my Father. I did what I knew was right, in the end. I did not let my Father down. I did not let Dean down. That is all that matters in the end."

He frowned. "But it never touched this place, not here. There is no apocalypse, no Lucifer, no mission. It is a kind of peace I don't know what to do with."

Castiel stopped. He had not meant to tell the man so much. He closed his mouth tightly and looked away.

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tenthten
2009-09-15 04:21 pm UTC (link)

John Smith nodded slowly to the flow of information, watching Castiel as he spoke. Archangels? Apocalypse? That could be translated quite a few ways, but he doubted it was the 'lifting of the veil' sort of thing. Given what he knew of Earth's Lucifer legends, it was more end of days sort of thing.

At the last of it, John broke into a grin. "Maybe that's what was meant to happen then. You can only do what you know is right and best, Castiel, and hope the rest of it unravels in the best way. This could have been the best way. You didn't die and instead ended up here. Maybe there's something for you to do here."

He waved a hand towards the pocket he had shoved the picture in.

"My TARDIS is the same way. I might want to go to Caliriseai to enjoy the silver beaches, but if there's something that I need to do or see on Ceti Sigma, I'm going to open the doors and find myself there."

His thin shoulders lifted in a shrug, a hand raking through his hair.

"You could be needed here. You just don't know how yet. Missions aren't always clear. There wouldn't be much purpose in them then. Maybe you ned to learn something."

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heavenslancer
2009-09-15 09:11 pm UTC (link)

Castiel listened respectfully and found a lot of wisdom in the human's words.
He had his doubts but he also had faith.
"It is possible. Dean is here. He told me he needs me, wants me around, but he may have only been expressing the human desire to keep things once you have them. I have been looking for chances to participate in life here in the hopes my mission will become clear.

I am not the only angel here. It is possible my brother and sister have a task for me.

You are a man of purpose. You understand. Do you have a mission here? Have you found your purpose?" Castiel looked at John hopefully.

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tenthten
2009-09-16 03:17 am UTC (link)

"Angel?"

Either he hadn't connected up the dots or simply not gotten it with what Castiel had been saying before that. John leaned to the side to look behind the angel, looking him up and down. Standing back up, he studied the top of Castiel's head.

"You're one of those undercover sorts then, aren't you?"

He was quiet for a time, thinking over the question before answering. It was a rare thing for him to do so, but there was an importance here, at least to him. When he finally spoke, it was without the light tones of earlier, nearly matching Castiel's solemnity.

"Perhaps my purpose or mission here was to put you back on track for yours. It's never good to depend on others, Castiel. Maybe you need to learn how to live or find your own tasks instead of depending on others for them."

With that, he grinned and shrugged, mood or the outer projection he gave of it changing to that of before.

"Or it could be that we're all just travelers lost, trying to remember where we left our maps and tickets."

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heavenslancer
2009-09-16 10:54 am UTC (link)

"I occupy a human vessel," Castiel said coolly. "My true form would likely be dangerous for you to look upon." It was too risky to see if it was safe for this man to look upon it. Castiel would not make that mistake again.

Castiel look in John's words with great seriousness. He didn't answer for some time and when he did he spoke slowly.

"I have been making an attempt. It is... difficult. I cannot move too far from what I was. I do not know when I will be called back into service yet I cannot shun the changes needed to stay here.
Still, I will never turn my back on Dean. Never."

A pause. "Are you unsure of your mission?" Castiel asked. "Are you lost too?"

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tenthten
2009-09-16 04:40 pm UTC (link)

"I thought that demons did possessions, not angels."

Making a thoughtful noise, he met Castiel's gaze fully although there was something about him that wasn't fully there. Then again, could one say the Meta-Crisis Doctor was ever completely there with what was going on?

"If he's your charge then you shouldn't abandon him or leave him. Sets a bad example."

A flicker of something ran through John's eyes at that question, a look that was more Theta than John, more dark than light.

"I could be. I rarely know anymore. As I said, I could have been put here at this time to talk to you. I could be here to wait for the return of others like the Doctor. I don't know. Another possibility is that I'm still locked in my prison cell at the bottom of Torchwood Three and this is all a psychotic delusion brought on by another bad drug interaction. Does it really matter in the end? This is what we have."

Dragging out his PDA, he frowned at the map and the time.

"Wouldn't happen to know which way Building Two is, would you?"

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heavenslancer
2009-09-17 06:51 am UTC (link)

Castiel's face hardened. "It is not a possession. It is voluntary. My vessel prayed for this. We do not possess people against their will."

He settled at John's next statement. "On that we agree."

He noted the change in the man's expression but he did not understand it. "I do not think this is a illusion unless it is one we both share. I certainly an not, nor can I be, affected by any human medication." That was not strictly true. He could allow Jimmy's body to be affected by them but the choice was still his.

"Do you require a doctor?" he asked in concern. Perhaps he could assist there at least.

"Yes, this is what we have. I am finding it easier, helpful, to accept it."

He looked up a John. "You do not have to face this place alone. Do you not have any acquaintances here?"
He blinked at the taller man's question. "I am sorry. I am not familiar with the geography of this place. Will that tell you?" he gestured at the PDA.

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