Angel had been so torn up, so furious over what happened to Fred. It hadn't been fair. He'd lost Cordelia and Fred was the one he'd saved from Pylea, the one he always managed to save. She hadn't known it, or maybe she had, but she'd restored his faith in his ability to do right by being there for him to save. And he'd failed her. He and Spike had tried and even though he'd had the opportunity to cast Illyria out of her body, it would've killed so many people in the process and he knew that Fred would've been angry with him over that, would've given him that sort of disappointed look that made him want to sit in some dark, secluded place where no-one could see him and the cloud of shame hanging over his head. The price had been too high, one life at the sacrifice of many. He hadn't been able to do it.

"She did and then she didn't," he starts to explain, moving to sit back down on the steps next to the sword he'd taken out of that assassin's hands. "Illyria... She's an Old One. One of the original demons who walked the Earth in the times before humans. They left our dimension long ago, but before then, they were killing one another and Illyria orchestrated her return before she was taken down. She was preordained to return to California, but she didn't chose Fred for this, Knox did— a scientist, someone who worked under Fred at Wolfram & Hart. The Senior Partners, the firm, they had nothing to do with it. It was Knox, it was...destiny." The edge that rolled off that word showed how much Angel disliked it. He hated that word now-a-days.

"Knox called it an honor." He scoffed and shook his head. His voice is quieter now and he's surprised not to hear himself stumbling over words. "She came into contact with Illyria's sarcophagus after Knox had it delivered to Wolfram & Hart. Her essence infected Fred, hollowed her out. When Fred died, Illyria took over her body."

Angel had been looking at the ground, but he lifted his gaze up to meet Cordelia's, then. "She's not Fred. Fred is gone. Believe me, if there was a way to bring Fred back, we would've already done it, but there isn't. Fred is no more. All that's left is Fred's shell and what stayed behind of her memories. Illyria...wants to be Fred. Sometimes she convinces herself that she is, but she isn't. There's nothing human about her and she hates herself for it."

He lifted a hand and scrubbed at his face, feeling very tired all of a sudden. "Something happened and Illyria was tricked, spurred into using her abilities to try and collapse time. She almost succeeded. The version of her that's here is from before that, though, but she's still unstable. Provoking her is the last thing we want as I'm not sure even Wesley could stop her as he's the only person she'll listen to, here."