βπΌπβ. (neonmod) wrote in cityoflux, @ 2013-06-06 00:15:00 |
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Apprehension. Fear. Worry. All of these stirred inside of Wilhemina, coiling like vines around her lungs as she remained motionless on the curb, hands pressed to her knees and heart racing faster and faster as the moments ticked by, the moments that would inevitably lead him to her and back into her life. He was here. He was here and they'd spoken, they had spoken and nothing, not a thing could have prepared her for it.
Erik.
Father.
Daddy.
Ghosts weren't unnatural. In fact, they were perfectly normal in a world where werewolves and vampires could run around, but the reality of the situation had yet to fully sink in. Never had she considered, not even for a second, that contacting her father's ghost would give her peace of mind. It had never come up in conversation with her family, and so it would stay that way, so that her father could become a pleasant memory and nothing more.
But he had always been more to her, more than a memory, more than just a face in a box full of pictures. For so long, he'd been a part of her life, though never physically-- not until now. Never had he been given a face in her dreams, never had the reality of meeting him been so real as it was at that moment, and the weight of it-- it choked her. Was it real? Was it a dream? How could a dream be so vivid?
She was going to meet her father for the first time in her life, and without shame, without embarrassment, she could admit that it scared her breathless.
Suppressing the urge to heave her stomach contents into her lap, Wilhemina breathed once, twice, before standing from the sidewalk and scrambling into the alleyway behind, fingers grazing the brick as she stood close to the wall, as though it would provide her comfort, so that she could peer around the corner for any sign of-- what was she supposed to call him? Erik? Father? Sir?
For the first time in a very long, long time, she felt like a little girl, only now she was without her mother, without her sources of comfort, and in a bizarre city, about to be reunited with the father she'd lost. Where was her strength, and how could she use it to keep her legs from shaking?
She didn't know.
She just didn't know anything anymore.