Jenn hadn't exactly done much since her punishment, mostly she had stayed in her room until her Master had left the house. She had still carried out her usual tasks but upon completion she had withdrawn to her room. Although her guilt was gone, an awkward distance had grown between her Master and herself and Jenn had not the slightest inkling as to how to fix it.
She'd spent a lot of time thinking, which was never good for her and so she had tried to distract herself. That hadn't helped much, she'd only ended up thinking about Carrick and how much easier serving him would be. Jenn's Master was unfathomable to her, when he had purchased her it seemed clear what he wanted from her. She was his fuckmeat and was to look after the house whilst he was gone.
Then he'd confused her... more that horrible word that had messed everything up. No. Jenn had messed things up, it was her fault and hers alone. Still... what mattered was that she wanted to submit to his will but she hadn't a clue what that actually was. He'd said he'd forgiven her but he hadn't... not really, otherwise she wouldn't still be in here would she? Why couldn't everyone just say what they mean? It would be so much simpler.
Jenn's thoughts were interrupted as her Master knocked and then entered the room. Why are you knocking? This is your house... she thought although stayed silent. She sat up and shook her head wordlessly. Jenn didn't like sleeping alone and certainly didn't like having a room to herself. She'd been sleeping on the floor and pretending that her Master was asleep in her bed in order to actually get some rest.
The slave girl listened to her Master intently but did not meet his gaze, a part of her felt that she should move to kneel at his feet but another part felt too lost without direction from him. Maybe she was being stubborn, she certainly didn't mean to but she couldn't shake the feeling that he should be making her do stuff.
At the mention of Carrick she looked up slightly, glad to hear that the vampire had made the suggestion as he had said he would. Not that she had doubted his word but it was easy to forget one insignificant slave. The following question made her feel uncomfortable. How could she ever make her Master understand? There weren't words for it.
Tears welled in her eyes as they lowered once more "Your happiness makes me happy... and I failed you... which made me sad" Jenn could have slapped herself for sounding so... so... childlike. But that was how she felt right now, like a helpless lost child.
"I don't know how to explain it. I don't understand how to make you happy and that's never been a problem for me before. Masters have always just used me for their pleasure, as a toy, a doll, a victim, whatever... but you're not like them and I don't know what to do. What's the point of me if I can't make you happy?" the desperation and frustration was clear in her voice as she was battered by a turbulent sea of emotions.
Lesson 1, You are a worthless waste of space. Lesson 2, You were born to please us. Lesson 3, You will be the best slave you can be to make up for your pitiful existence. Lesson 4, Your happiness is of no consequence and can only be found in keeping us happy...