[roy/riza; g] A Hard Game Title: A Hard Game Author:emilie_burns Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist Pairing: Roy Mustang/Riza Hawkeye Rating: G Wordcount: 1798 Warnings: None Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist (Hagane no Renkinjutsushi) is copyrighted by Hiromu Arakawa/Square Enix. This is a work of fanfiction for personal entertainment only. The song cited is "Love Is A Hard Game To Play" by Stevie Nicks. Notes: This fic can be considered a prequel to Promises (R). Summary:She let her gaze drop from the sorry excuse of a road stretching ahead to her hands, calloused and blunt-nailed and scratched. Working hands. Not the manicured, graceful hands of the society women he took out to functions so often.
A Hard Game
We've been through thick and thin, and back again, And we can endure love's sweet pain. Remember, starting the fire is easy, The hardest part is learning how to keep the flame.
The summer's late afternoon heat was stifling in the car even with the windows down as First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye drove her superior officer back to Eastern Headquarters from an inspection trip to several outposts. When she glanced into the rearview mirror, it looked as if he'd nodded off since they departed the last outpost an hour ago. Another hour and a half of driving stretched out before her, with the view out the rear window completely obscured by a stifling cloud of yellow dust kicked up by the tires from the bone-dry sandy path that barely qualified as a proper road.
The long day and the high heat made her fight off a yawn, feeling as if all her energy had been leeched out of her from being in the sun too long, like a faded carpet or sign. She almost wished for some sort of trouble to crop up to break the monotony and wake her up a little more, and she felt increasingly cranky that she didn't have the luxury of a nap. Granted, it was part and parcel of her job as the adjutant to the Flame Alchemist, Colonel Roy Mustang, but damn him for looking so comfortable back there.
The drone of the engine, wind, and road beneath the tires was hypnotic, and the sudden break by his voice startled her.
"You know, Lieutenant, it occurred to me, Hughes might be right about one thing."
Even his voice sounded lazy and sleepy and did nothing to distract her fatigue.
"What's that, sir?"
"That I probably do need to get married, at least eventually, if I'm the führer. It would reflect better on me to have a lovely wife on my arm."
Riza narrowed her eyes and forced her tone to remain neutral. "Perhaps, sir." At least the flicker of anger and jealousy she strove to hid was driving off the fatigue.
"So I've been thinking about that." He yawned and stretched a bit, rubbing his eyes without opening them.
"Indeed." Her knuckles were growing white and the absence of fatigue came with the price of a small headache forming at the base of her neck.
"She would have to be very beautiful, of course. Beautiful, graceful, intelligent, educated, trustworthy, and loyal," he continued. "In fact, I know exactly who would make the perfect wife."
Riza started mentally planning a trip to the gun range to keep her skills well-honed once they got to East City. "You narrowed it down from all of your dates?" she asked, struggling to keep her tone as neutral as humanly possible.
"It wasn't that difficult, as unfortunately, I've yet had the opportunity to take her out on a date," Roy said, his tone the usual melodramatic lament that often cropped up when discussing his various romances.
"You've yet to date her, and yet you know she would be the perfect wife?" This time, she didn't bother to hide her skeptical disdain.
"Circumstances keep interfering with plans for a date, but I already know her very well, nevertheless."
"I see." She let her gaze drop from the sorry excuse of a road stretching ahead to her hands, calloused and blunt-nailed and scratched. Working hands. Not the manicured, graceful hands of the society women he took out to functions so often.
"I'll take her out eventually, and when I do, I plan to pull out all the stops."
"Of course."
"There's a little bit of a problem, you see. I have no idea if she will even have me."
"Now you're just fishing for compliments, sir. You've never had any difficulty with getting any woman you want to fall all over herself for you."
"Eh," he said in dismissal. "They're lightweights. This one, she's special, unlike any of them. I'd dare say I've already fallen in love with her, and I haven't a clue how she feels. In fact, she may very well just tell me to go to hell if I asked her out for a night of dancing. Isn't that ironic, Lieutenant? All these women who would love to have the surname of Mustang, and I've fallen for someone who seems indifferent to me."
"Hardly ironic," Riza said, torn between wanting to smack this woman if she turned him down and hurt him, and hoping against hope she would. "It's simple human nature to want what you can't have."
"I suppose." He sighed and looked out the window. "But I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else but her. She is, without a doubt, the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on, and she's more than strong enough to hold up to the strain of being the wife of the leader of the country, strong enough to hold up me if I start to falter. She's so incredibly brave and loyal, and there's only a handful of people who I trust as much as I trust her."
Riza gave the scenery ahead of her an extremely evil glare. "That's nice," she said, her tone as flat as the landscape. "You must have spent a great deal of time in her company at some point or another to know this about her. A childhood friend?"
"Not really. I've only known her a few years, but I see her almost every day. I hope I have a chance of winning her over someday, at least enough to consider spending her life with me. Although, that wouldn't be very fair, I suppose, to do that to her, if she doesn't feel the same way. She's already sacrificed so much."
Every word made her hate this paragon of perfection more and more. "A lot of people have had to sacrifice things," she said.
"True, but she deserves happiness too. But I'm a very selfish man, Lieutenant. I want to do what's right by her, but I can't imagine being at the top without her where she has always been, almost every day of my life, right by my side and keeping me safe and focused and out of trouble. She'd have as much a right to that position as I do, for all she's given and continues to give to help me get there. I know I need to let her choose what's right for her, but it's a rather sobering picture, trying to see my life that far ahead, and not see you."
Wait. Wait, what? She turned around in the seat, fully distracted from the dusty path, and stared at him.
What.
He smiled, a small and nervous one.
"Who are--"
"Lieutenant, the road."
She turned back around quickly and corrected her course before driving into a clump of desert brush. "Sir? Who are you talking about?"
There were a few moments of silence, and she glanced at him through the rearview mirror to be met with an extremely flabbergasted stare.
"Lieutenant," he said, his tone dry. "I know you are more intelligent than this. Has the heat fried your brain?"
"You've given me too many conflicting descriptions of who this person is, sir."
"How so, Lieutenant?"
"Toward the end, it almost seemed as if you were speaking of me, but you were also going on about what a great beauty this woman is."
"And you think you're not?"
"I've seen the women you date, and--"
"And not a single one of them interest me beyond their purpose as part of my decoy image to keep the officers above me off-guard," he interrupted. "They're artificial, and most of them need all that crap on them to be remotely attractive. You're still more beautiful than any of them, without a single bit of it."
"If you say so, sir." She couldn't quite believe it, but that was small potatoes to everything else on her mind.
"I do. And if you've got your heart set on someone else, or some other dreams for after I reach the top, I want you to go, you deserve it. But if you don't have anything planned, I hope you will at least consider remaining by my side. I'd never ask for more than you're willing to give, and if you would prefer to... well, make other arrange--"
"Yes." The word tumbled from her lips before she was aware she spoke.
He was silent for a long moment. "So." His voice was curiously strained, and a cold lump formed in her stomach. Had she said the wrong thing? "Other arrangements it is. I under--"
Oh. Oh, no. "Stop. No," she cut in. "I... no. That... that would not be necessary, sir. Other arrangements, I mean. I... it would not be a problem."
Silence again, then his voice was quiet. "Are you certain, Lieutenant? If I am making you uncomfortable, I'm sorry."
"No, no, you're not, I- I'm certain." She idly wondered if she had managed to nod off behind the wheel and was dreaming all of this. What were they talking about? Did he say he'd fallen for her? Asking her to marry him? What?
The only sounds for long, agonizing minutes were the wind and the road and the engine.
"Lieutenant?"
"Yes, sir?"
"You are extremely adorable when you blush, you know that?" In the mirror, she saw the old signature cocky grin come back.
She slammed her eyes shut in mortification at the sudden surge of increased heat. "I'm not blushing," Riza retorted. "It's hot out."
"Of course, of course," he said, his tone vividly stating his skepticism. Then the smile faded. "All joking aside, Lieutenant, I meant what I said. I can't imagine my life without you in it, and with each day, I'm more and more certain I want, no, I need you at my side, not only as my adjutant. Will you think about it, at least?"
"I don't need to think about it, sir," she said as quietly as the existing noise would allow. "It is a place I've found myself wanting to be for some time now."
"As I said earlier, circumstances prevent me from taking her out for a grand evening on the town," he said. She shivered when she felt his fingertips brush along her jawline, back toward the base of her ear. "I'll get us there someday, Riza."
Her eyes met his through the mirror, and someday was too far away. But it would have to do, knowing that the promise of it was there.
"I hope I'm not just hallucinating this from the heat."
"I hope I didn't actually fall asleep and start dreaming this."
Riza looked away, back to the road, and smiled. "Someday," she agreed as the car continued to carry them back to a place where such talk could spell the end of their careers. The empty, desolate terrain never looked more beautiful.