InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Eat your Spinach or the moths"

Christine Strange (Palmer) (tosavelives) wrote in chances_rpg,
@ 2022-01-09 20:56:00

Entry tags:

!gamewide plot (generic), marvel: stephen strange (mcu), ~!game plot: mutant mania, ~ex: marvel christine palmer (mcu)

Who: Christine Palmer and Stephen Strange
When: Late Sunday Night/Early Monday Morning
Where: Their apartment
What: Powers come knocking!
Warnings: Stephen Strange, himself, is a warning.

They had started as light whispers. The kind that make you turn your head, wondering if someone was talking to you in passing. Tones and subject matters changed, laughter came flooding in and out, and chatter from this way and that was almost deafening.

That had just been during her first two hours of work Saturday morning.

It fell quiet save for a low mumble that lingered. Popping hear ears and yawning did nothing to clear the uncomfortable pressure. Customers talking with her sounded slightly muffled. Nothing was coming across as clear. It was...unsettling. Sudden hearing loss wasn't normal. It wasn't completely out of the question, either, but she would have seen the signs. There was no doubt.

The voices had come thundering into her head. Loud and screaming. An argument over overpriced tickets. Laughter. A very private conversation. Snoring. A stream of questions. Yelling. A baby crying. Were Emily and Stephen fighting over the television? Were their neighbors?

With the living room quiet and free of her fellow roommates, Christine did her best not to pound on Stephen's door. It was overwhelming, though. The chatter, the constant buzzing of voices coming this way and that. "Stephen...Stephen Strange, if this is some kind of magic thing gone wrong...Stephen!"

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cametobargain
2022-01-10 06:07 pm UTC (link)

It didn't matter how long it had been since they'd been 'together' per se, Stephen would always jump when he heard panic in Christine's voice. He rushed to the door of his bedroom (not exactly hard, they weren't living in suites here) and flung it open, watching her carefully. "What? What's going on?"

For a moment, he actually did have to consider if he'd messed up a spell or anything. But no, that was ridiculous, he hadn't done anything magical in days. And surely nothing that would affect her directly. He knew Emily had been practicing - and not in the Mirror Dimension, how did her world not even have a Mirror Dimension? - but he couldn't picture the teenager doing anything actively harmful.

"Are you alright?" he asked, reminding himself to breathe and stepping closer. Of course, he was going to attempt to not look overly concerned.

That didn't mean he wasn't really very concerned.

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tosavelives
2022-01-10 08:46 pm UTC (link)

Ducking her head to try and steal a glance into his room, looking for a possible source of all the noise, she looked flustered. Pinching the bridge of her nose, a pained expression on her face, Christine slowly shook her head.

The voices were still filtering in and out, and Christine swore she heard Stephen's in the mix. Not the words he was saying, the questions he was asking, but different things. Something about Emily and, yet, another dimension?

Looking at him through one open eye, still attempting to relieve the pressure that the voices was causing, she shook her head.

"I don't know. Don't laugh, but I am hearing...voices. A lot of them. People I don't know, but what's a Mirror Dimension? Why is Emily supposed to be in it?" Christine let out a heavy sigh, rubbing at her temples now. It was clear that wherever the noise was coming from it wasn't from anyone or anything in their apartment.

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cametobargain
2022-01-10 09:30 pm UTC (link)

Stephen had seen a lot over the last several years. He'd seen thousands of timelines, he'd seen various dimensions, he'd caused a rather impressive time loop if he did say so himself. Some of his colleagues (because were they friends? They didn't really count as friends) had powers he couldn't even begin to explain. Hell, some of his own powers he couldn't really explain if asked.

But that didn't mean it was easier hearing that Christine Palmer, of all people...

"You can read minds?" he blurted, confusion written over his face. He moved to sit beside her, looking her over carefully. Because honestly, once a physician, always at least a little bit, a physician. "I'm not laughing, that's not funny." In fact, it was a little scary. And...potentially embarrassing, if he let his mind wander too much.

Shit.

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tosavelives
2022-01-11 12:07 am UTC (link)

"Sure. We'll call it that." Of course, she'd get something so helpful when she was no where near a hospital or still working in the medical field. Then again, if it was just a constant influx of jumbled voices and words, maybe it wasn't all that wonderful.

His weight beside her was nice. The concern was nice, too. Christine would have probably been relishing in it, perhaps asking questions, but the conversations and exchanges made collecting thought practically impossible.

Shit.

She shorted lightly, one hand holding her head as she nodded. "That about covers it." If this was what being a mind reader was like, to hell with the saying. Christine didn't want to ever be one if her head was going to just be voices all day.

"You would not believe some of the things people talk about without a second thought." There was another pause and, no. That was wrong. He probably could imagine and, truthfully, so could Christine. They had lived in New York after all.

"It's like dull static. Like trying to tune a radio station or everyone talking at you at the same time without a way to get them to stop." Christine looked over to Stephen, clearly seeking his help and guidance in the entire thing. Surely he had some suggestions? A way to actually make it stop?

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cametobargain
2022-01-11 08:15 pm UTC (link)

Alright. He couldn't panic. His panic would just make hers worse. That was not going to help either of them any. It was just, she was the first telepath he'd actually encountered. Well, maybe the weird Bug Girl the aliens had traveled with. She seemed more like an empath. He was fairly sure if she focused, Wanda could read minds, but he didn't want to think about her at the moment.

Okay. She was looking to him to help, and he would. If he had access to his library, he might have a magical fix. But that wasn't a thing just then, even though another book had shown up in his room that day.

Gently, he reached over and took her face in his hands. "I know what you want, but I don't have a fix for this. Not a magical one, anyway." Maybe if he had more time, he could come up with something. "Let's try this, okay? Intentionally focus on one voice. Just one. Find someone's thoughts and try to only hear that. Tune out everyone and everything else." Against his better judgement, his thumb stroked the skin of her cheek as he spoke.

He might not know telepaths, but he did know powers. And he knew the beginning, learning what you could do, was the hardest part. She was one of the strongest people he knew, she'd learn to adjust. He just had to help her get there.

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tosavelives
2022-01-13 06:28 am UTC (link)

Force of habit had Christine placing a hand against his. Gentle and caring even if he wouldn't agree. She found a brief moment of solace in it. She even smiled, albeit small and a bit lopsided.

There weren't many voices to choose from. None that Christine wanted to focus on except one. She'd heard his voice many times in varying tones and emotions. She liked when he talked around his smiles and laughter best, but appreciated the rich, deep octave it took when it was just the two of them.

Stephen's voice, thoughts or otherwise, was the obvious choice.

"You're better at this than you're giving yourself credit for," she commented, her face softening and eyes closed. "I should have been there for you. With you." The time after Dormammu. Saving the world on more than one occasion.

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cametobargain
2022-01-13 02:07 pm UTC (link)

If he'd been honest with himself, he would have known she'd pick him. Maybe a part of him did know, because he was trying to force his more positive thoughts to the forefront of his mind. Anything calming. Which, given the life he'd led in recent years, wasn't a lot to choose from.

But the last few months... Even the weirdness of it, the frustration of his ridiculous job search and the insanity of someone putting him in charge of a teenaged girl, even with all of that, his life felt more calm and put together than it had in a really long time. And if he let himself think on it for more than a moment, it was very obviously because of the woman in front of him.

So he gave a soft laugh, touching his forehead lightly to hers. "You're probably right. Part of it was just my stupid pride." She'd pushed him away - and rightfully so - and he'd been hurt. And, as always, Stephen Strange's pain came out in the form of arrogance and defiance and ego.

"You had your own life to live. And I wanted you to live it. Not deal with me and...all this." In his mind, he was gesturing to the insanity that was the world around him. But he was in no hurry to let her go. "I'm sorry. I should have gone back. Talked things out. I just..." He hesitated. "Can you see what I see or just hear me think them?"

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tosavelives
2022-01-14 10:10 am UTC (link)

"Shh...shh. One thing at a time." It was all Stephen's voice but at full speed. Loud and almost echoing with acoustics anyone would envy. Christine had been focused on what he had been saying more than his thoughts. She wanted to hear him, consciously listen without the mental distraction.

With his head against hers, it was their final moment together all over again. There were steps to take and things to work through, but Christine could forgive him. He'd always had good intentions, even if Stephen couldn't quite see them.

She knew he could now; understood what she had meant all those times before now.

"I just hear your thoughts. I don't think this is a movie and popcorn thing," she teased, chuckling under her breath. Tilting her head back enough for Christine to look at Stephen fully, she looked hesitant. Her hand tightened around his briefly.

How much did he want her to hear? To know? She didn't want to cross an invasive line.

"Should I let go now?" It then hitting Christine how much she didn't want to.

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cametobargain
2022-01-14 07:58 pm UTC (link)

How long could he get away with touching her under the guise of 'helping'? Maybe he should try and find out? That would be wrong. Wouldn't it? It just felt right to be holding her again and that probably wasn't fair to her. ...also she was probably hearing him think most of that.

Quickly, he changed the subject. "No, no, that's good. There's just... I mean, I wouldn't want you to see any of it. But it might also explain why... Why I didn't come back." How did you tell someone who cared about you, whether she should or shouldn't, about the things he'd done that day? About just how many times he'd died? And logically Stephen had known, going in, that he would simply resume back to that moment over and over again. That didn't make each and every instance less terrifying, or painful. He had leaned on his dependence on logic to get back to Mordo and Wong. But later, so much later, even now after so many other things he'd seen, he could still remember that first confrontation.

Which... Okay. So now Christine was probably hearing all of that. He really wasn't good at this.

"Bunnies, kittens, daffodils... I'm running out of positive things here, Christine." He was trying to sound light hearted, and even cracked a tiny smile, but his hands dropped to his lap, letting her break the connection if she chose.

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tosavelives
2022-01-17 03:11 pm UTC (link)

It was quite the jump between thoughts, but getting to 'see' them was good. Christine swore she could feel her own emotions mirroring just how Stephen had felt. The fear, concern, sadness, and pain; only to save the world in the end without a second thought.

What would have happened if she hadn't taken the page, though? What if she had just gone with him? Would the world have ended?

The daffodils and kittens were a nice touch and, through the bleak darkness of previous thought, Christine gave her own small grin. She took his hands into her own. "What about puppies? Ducklings? Decent coffee and tea?" she mused, a light laugh against his ear before Christine was placing a soft kiss against his cheek.

Drawing back, lips barely touching Stephen's, she looked...concerned. A touch confused, too. It was clear how Stephen felt and how long he'd felt like this. Christine, herself, would have been lying if she couldn't admit her own feelings; how she hated walking away from him.

"This...this could be dangerous, Stephen." In the best possible way, of course.

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cametobargain
2022-01-17 08:04 pm UTC (link)

"No, no, not ducklings. Now you're just being ridiculous."

He hated this. Because he knew he wasn't strong enough to walk away. Which meant he would, inevitably, end up hurting her all over again. And once again they would be back at square one. It was a seemingly never ending cycle and maybe, one day, one of them would finally break it.

But he knew deep down it wasn't going to be him. Not this time. "When Love and Hate Collide, Def Leppard, 1995." A tiny grin pulled at his lips. "Or Bed of Roses? No, not that one." One thing he wasn't was a cheater, after all. He just tended to walk out. Not that that was a lot better.

"Look," he finally said, as firmly as he dared given her current state, "I can't...I can't just change how I feel. But I also can't change who I am." No amount of universe saving would suddenly make Stephen Strange a kind and gentle man. At the end of the day, he was still who he'd always been and it was up to her to see that. "I'm not afraid of dangerous. But that doesn't mean I need to take you down with me in the process."

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tosavelives
2022-01-22 03:34 am UTC (link)

Of course, Stephen would have a song for the situation. It was one of his more charming talents and one that was impressive. Even in the middle of a busy surgery room.

"Billy Joel. 1977." She paused, trying to clear her head of the slowly invading words and chatter. Christine didn't want him to change the way he felt. Not at all. There were things that had taken a turn for the better, but they were things Christine had always seen him in. "I took the good times. I'll take the bad times. I take you just the way you are."

While Christine was a bit hesitant, she was sure of her choice of words. Billy Joel's words, maybe, but the sentiment was real. It was there. Was it too much too soon, though? She could have lingered in his mind, hoping to hear his reaction and words first, but she didn't.

"...I love you just the way you are."

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cametobargain
2022-01-22 04:07 pm UTC (link)

It was, oddly, not the first time someone had been in his head. And he didn't entirely like the moment when she eased off. For someone who wasn't always good about vocalizing how he felt, having her able to hear him without him speaking a word was useful. But it did mean he could be a little more obvious in his surprise at her words. "God, you've got terrible taste," he half groaned, half laughed.

Not in Billy Joel. That would be horrible of him. No, her taste in men. In him. Christine Palmer deserved the whole goddamn world, not an unemployed Avenger with nothing to Avenge and no real outlet for the one thing that had saved him from the edge.

Yet he couldn't stop himself if he tried. She'd opened the door and he was going to go bursting through it like French peasants at Versailles. Almost on pure instinct, he tilted his head, meeting his lips to hers. Softly at first, gauging her reaction. Fear and an uncharacteristic thread of optimism coursed through him, frantic to get a grasp on what was happening now.

And the entire time, a litany of words rushed through his head that would have been impossible for her to miss. One phrase, over and over, repeated like a mantra from a desperate man. I love you.

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