HP ficlet: Fidelity [Draco/Severus, general]
Title: Fidelity Author: celandineb Fandom: HP Pairing: Draco/Severus Rating: general Length: 737 words Warnings: some sexual references Summary: "He'd always looked out for me when I was at school." Note: For accioslash, who wanted Snape/Draco, loyalty.
He'd always looked out for me when I was at school. I know the Gryffindors considered it favouritism, but they don't understand loyalty the way that Slytherins do. Dumbledore plainly favoured Gryffindors; Severus merely tried to balance the books.
Yes, Severus. It was Professor Snape at school, naturally, but after the incident on the Astronomy Tower, when we fled together, things changed between us. I couldn't have killed Dumbledore. I'd tried, certainly, because if I hadn't then my family would have been in worse danger than we already were, but I was never completely unhappy that all of my attempts failed; even that last moment, when he was most vulnerable, something in me kept me from killing him although I had the power and the ability to do so. What I lacked was the will.
When I told that to Severus, he touched my cheek, and his habitual scowl softened. "That was my hope," he told me. "I promised your mother I would keep you from harm, and do what you were ordered if you could not. Had you been able to, that would have harmed you as much or more as any physical injury."
"Like that spell Potter used," I said, and a flash of pain that I did not understand crossed his face.
"Like that, yes," he agreed. "Murder is not to be undertaken lightly. It warps the spirit. Do you understand me?"
I didn't, really, but I pretended that I did, nodding and putting my arms around him. "Thank you," I breathed against his neck, and felt him shiver. A number of past observations and incidents came together for me then, and I knew.
If there was a seduction, it was wholly mutual, you must realise. He did not "take advantage of my youth and inexperience," as cant phrase might have it, nor did I give myself out of some sort of gratitude. I wanted Severus, had done since I had understood that men attracted me more than women ever would. He had power and experience and authority, all things that I craved. Yet there were cracks and chinks in his armour, visible to one who observed him carefully, and those humanised him. Appearance? He's not handsome, nowhere near it, but his voice could stir a corpse to arousal and his movements are almost alarmingly sensual. Besides, I'm good-looking enough for two. Severus said so.
We were careful. No one guessed, I'm almost certain, although once or twice I lingered longer with him than prudence would have dictated. I could tell that there was something tormenting him, not just the Dark Lord, something else that he wrestled with, but he would never say what it was. Not until the night of the battle did I realise, and by then it was almost too late. Once I knew my parents were all right, I had to give them the slip to search for Severus.
I found him in the Shrieking Shack, left for dead by the Dark Lord – which was only to be expected – and by Potter too. Well, they'd never gotten on, had they? I had never tried to Side-Along anyone before, but desperation can be a good teacher. We made it to Malfoy Manor, deserted except for the house-elves. I owed him my life; now he owes me his, too. I can't claim to have saved him altogether, for he was the one taking the antivenin and other antidotes all along, but the aid of the bezoar I brought was necessary too. It took hours, but when Severus's eyes finally opened, he was rational, he knew me, and he knew too that once again he must flee for his life, despite my protests.
Everything in the wizarding world was in such an uproar, those few days, that it was not impossible to slip him into the Ministry, from which he was able to take a Portkey to Italy. He wouldn't let me go with him, not then, but I made arrangements so that he would be able to access his Gringotts account, and three months later I joined him. My parents were less than pleased, but my loyalty to Severus outweighed their displeasure.
Now we've been together for, let me think, nearly twenty years. More than half my lifetime; astonishing, that. But neither of us would have it any other way. We don't need any formal vows to know that our attachment is forever.