WHO: Elvera and Jules MacLaver WHEN: 2013 WHERE: Their home SUMMARY: Jules gets ready for prom and is subsequently stood up. WARNINGS: self-body shaming, poor self-esteem, negative perception of body image.
“Oh!” Elvera’s hand went to cover her mouth as her breath hitched. “Oh, honey… You look beautiful.”
“You have to say that,” Jules said as she looked at her mother, “You’re my mom.” Though the compliment gave her the boost of confidence she needed. She had spent a lot of time trying to figure out the make-up thing, using various youtube tutorials to figure out the technique.
“It’s true,” Elvera insisted as she hastily wiped at her eyes, determined not to be that kind of mom.
“What time is it?”
“Time for pictures.” She would, however, absolutely be that mom. She already had a dated digital camera in her hands and while she showed it to her daughter with one hand, she motioned to the fireplace, which she had pointedly uncluttered so that it would look nice for pictures. “I want some of you by yourself before your date gets here.”
“Mom,” she said playing the part of embarrassed teen inconvenienced by the request. “He’ll be here any minute.” Though seeing the digital camera in her mother’s hand she knew she would lose this fight and with hunched shoulders she shuffled over to the fireplace giving the body language of the admitting defeat fine on a teenager could give. “Didn’t know we still hand one of those things,” she mumbled as she got into place.
“Do you want me to take some on your camera, honey?” Elvera held out her hand for the inevitable smartphone with the cool camera that her daughter had, “So you can post it on Facebook without waiting?” She thought that was how it worked. “Or your Snapchatting?”
“You don’t call it Snapchatting,” she shook her head in disbelief. “I use Instagram, mom.” As Elvera nodded in recognition, Jules pulled her smartphone from her clutch and handed it over to her mom. “But yes, please take some pictures.” Evidence that she did look this good for once.
“Your father will like to see these, too,” she commented idly as she precariously tried to balance both a phone and her digital camera before giving up and putting the camera on the top of the arm chair. After a little bit of fiddling and finger jabbing, Elvera took pictures: close-ups, full-body, horizontal, vertical, too many…
Yes, of course he would. Even if he wasn’t here he shouldn’t be counted out. Jules posed for photos with a smile on her face. Okay it was starting to hurt now. “Are you done yet?” She said through her smile. “Please let me you’re done.” It had to be time for her date to pick her up. They said six thirty right?
“Almost!” Elvera promised as she put down Jules’ phone in favor of her digital camera so that she could take the same set of pictures. “You’re going to have such a wonderful time tonight… We want to make sure we get all the pictures we can of you before you dance all your makeup off.”
The pictures eventually came to a stop, and Elvera returned her daughter’s phone to her as well as a quick little kiss to her forehead.
How many pictures could her mother need? Finally they all came to a stop and she took her phone immediately opening up the photos flipping through them to inspect them. She looked okay. Which one would she put on her instagram? “Thanks mom.” Now far more engrossed in deciding which picture was the perfect picture to post.
“You’re welcome, sweetie.” More kisses, quick and placed erratically along the top of her girl’s head. Her eyes tilted up towards the clock: it was getting late, and a motherly ball of anxiety began to climb. But she swallowed it, for her daughter, and craned her head to look at Juliet’s phone.
“I think that’s the one,” she offered her opinion, finger pointing at a picture on the camera roll.
“Really, that one?” Jules looked up at her mother and smile. “I think so too.” Jules selected that one and then started flipping through the filters. She paused and looked up at her mother. “He isn’t here yet?” Jules looked at the time and finally let herself entertain the idea that maybe he wasn’t coming.
Elvera wrapped an arm around the length of her daughter’s shoulder and brought her in for a small squeeze.
“Try calling him. Maybe he’s having car troubles. I could let you borrow the car…”
Jules took the advice but sent a text asking him if he was on his way, or if something happened. She saw the note under the bubble say read and she waited for the dots to advise her that he was going to reply. Those dots weren’t coming. “He’s read the message but he isn’t replying.” Jules started to sound a little panicked.
“Maybe he’s driving. It’s good that he isn’t texting and driving.” She started to rub the high of her daughter’s shoulders comfortingly.
“What if he doesn’t come?” Jules looked at her mother. “Do I still go? Do I stay home?” Her thought was leaning to ripping all this stuff off and sitting in her room with a giant bucket of ice cream.
Elvera’s brows knit together with concern; her heart heavy at the thought of having to approach this conversation with her daughter. She was so beautiful and kind, and the thought that anyone might purposefully stand her up was beyond her-- it wasn’t possible.
No, Elvera was certain that he was on his way.
“He’s going to come, honey,” soft and reassuring, because Elvera refused to believe anyone could be so cruel.
Okay she would text him again. She would wait a little longer before jumping to conclusions. Mom was right, maybe he was driving and that was a good thing if he was not texting and driving. Did she dare call? She didn’t want to leave a voicemail for him to laugh at later. The texts would be enough. No, she wished she could take the texts back. He wasn’t coming and now he will show people and laugh about it later. “He isn’t coming. He totally isn’t coming.” He had made her trust him, like he was going to be a decent guy to her. That she was different.
Jules walked away from her mom, pulling the pins out of her hair. Good thing she hadn’t posted the instagram, she didn’t want anyone to see she had actually dressed up and believed him.
“Jules-- Jules,” Elvera called after her before hurrying after her, hands reaching for her daughter’s in an attempt to steady them.
She was quiet for a long moment, wondering how she was supposed to keep a straight face in front of her daughter when her heart was breaking.
“You look beautiful. And if you want to go on your own, you should go on your own. Or,” she plucked a bobby pin from Jule’s fingers and pushed it back into her hair. “Let me take you to Seattle. We can share a treat. I’ll dress up and we’ll make a great night of it.”
“I am not going on my own for them all the point and laugh at me.” Jules was fighting back tears but she didn’t think she was going to win. “What’s the point. It is prom night, I know it is prom night and he isn’t coming and everyone in town is going to laugh about it.” She lost the battle with the tears and they started to fall. “The fat girl got stood up by the attractive boy, hilarious. Too fat to have a brain and too stupid to lose the weight,” Jules half shout cried at her mom. “Just leave me alone.”
“No,” Elvera tried to edge in a little desperately, her arms scooping her baby girl up in her arms, and Jules let herself rest against her mother’s chest as she cried feeling the comfort of her mother’s arms, which were exactly what she needed right now.