Oh God Oh God We're All Gonna Die?

Dean had left me with Sol's new id cards when he left this morning. I gave him one of the cells that Buff, Tara, and me had gotten yesterday. It also had all of our numbers plugged into it already. Tara even put different rings in everyone's phone to suit each of our personalities. I hadn't tried to call anyone but I was a little nervous what songs she put in for everyone. I offered him to take his pick from all the weapons that we also picked up yesterday but he turned me down and said that he already had gotten some.

All of the doors and windows were now fixed in this place. I told Buff and Tara that my job was now done. No more mouse trap or poop clean up for me anymore. I was done with that. We'll see if they listen. You'd think taking one girl who's recently a vengeance demon and had been a badass wicca before that and Buffy who's been a slayer since she was a teen, that between the two of them they could handled little mouse corpses. No, they squeeled like little girls when they saw their first dead mouse. It's pretty funny actually.

So, yesterday, we all went to the ice cream shop and purchased Dawnie the largest chocolate shake in the existence of the universe and went over to Angel Investigations. No one was there though. Buff was really disappointed. She wrote a note and stabbed the straw through it by setting it on the doorstep. She also put all of our cell numbers on it.

Then after that we all went to Cordy's shelter to say hi and drop in on her and see what she was up to. A woman there told us that she was out of the office for the day. So I gave her my phone number and said that if she wanted to call that she could. Buff said that she told Cordy about us and what happened and that Cordy handed Buffy the same brochure that she gave me. I thought that was hilarious. At least I wasn't the only one she thought was nuts.

So, besides the phones and weapons yesterday, we didn't do so well.

The green demon Lorne had told me a few things about his home dimension, all of which had thus far proved to be true. Yet, nothing had quite prepared me for the strangeness of a demon world. I could fill volumes upon volumes with words to describe this place, things which no human has ever laid eyes upon.

I'd landed in the woods when I arrived, and quickly found cover from a hellhound that was on the loose. It seems as though humans are used as slaves here, and staying out of the employ of a demonic master is now one of my main goals. Observing a small village for a few days I've managed to find enough food to survive and apparently I'm not the only human who has thrown off the yoke of slavery.

A week after opening the portal I was able to locate the main camp of free humans in this world. Mutually distrustful of each other they left me in a cave for a week before deciding the demons hadn't sent me to retrieve information on their campaign. When I told them I was here to find the champion Angel they put me back in the cave for three days.

So much for my brilliant plan to find Angel.

After my three days a man called the Groosalug arrived. I'd been informed he would be the one to decide my fate.

"You seek the champion? Slayer of the Hart? The Angel?" He'd opened the door to the cave, spilling light in where there had been none. Had he just said slayer of the hart?

"I do. My name is Wesley Wyn-" Interrupted by the silhouette running to me I expected to feel his sword slicing into me at any second.

"You are Wesley! The Angel speaks of you as a great warrior. Is it true you are Illyria's keeper?" Now that he was out of the sunlight I could see he was just a man, a short one at that.

"Who is Illyria?" Angel had spoken of me as a warrior? "You know Angel then?"

"Yes, it is best not to speak the names of an old one. Come, we will go to the Angel now!" His grip on my hand strong he pulled me out of the cave and handed me the reigns to a unicorn. My life was never simple. And it didn't seem as though it would ever be.

After Spike had left the room Dawn and I talked for awhile. I told her as much as I thought would be safe for her to know. I was not used to conversing with anyone and it was nice to be able to talk again. Dawn had told me all about her Wesley and about how smart-minded he was. She told me how he had gone to the hell dimension Pylea to rescue another warrior. She was also very worried about his return. I offered to try and find a way for the two of us to go there to help her warrior but she declined. Admitted to myself and myself alone that I was glad she had not wanted for me to find a way. What I had heard of that dimension was that if you appeared in the skin of a human's or looked like a human, then you were considered cattle to them. Only green-skinned demons were considered the superior and only race that meant anything there. It was truly very backward and a old fashioned way of thinking.

Today Dawn and I went shopping. She said that I needed shoes most of all and clothes that didn't look so old fashioned. When we got outside I told her that I really didn't need to go out and buy clothes. The first woman that I saw walk past was dressed in a short skirt and short blouse. I flicked my wrist and I had on the very clothing that the woman was wearing. Through clenched teeth Dawn said, "You can't just walk around doing that. People will be suspicious." I was confused but since she was my friend I nodded at her and switched back to what I was wearing before. "Plus, couldn't there be a time when you won't be able to do that?" I tried my best to explain the lines to her. If I was not close enough to a ley line I would not be able to change my clothes. I guess it would be best if I did not use so many magics anyways. All magic leaves a trace and it might be best if I used as little as possible so Ugeralimetpe would have less of a chance of finding me.

We went to a place called a "mall." It looked just like an indoor marketplace. It was busy and brightly colored and Dawn was dragging me into almost every store. The first place that we went into was a store called Victoria's Secret. Dawn asked me if I knew what bra size I was. I had no idea what she was talking about. She pointed at a statue that had some sort of breast covering on it. Shaking my head at her she started to explain to me what a bra was and that we'd need to have me fitted. She told the saleslady that I was a hippy that had just gotten a real life job and that I needed to wear a bra for a first time. The sales woman just nodded in understanding at Dawn before taking me to the back of the store and wrapping cold plastic with numbers on it several times around different parts of my breasts. She nodded and said 32C and went off to get me several different colors of "bras" as her and Dawn called them. It wasn't fun getting them on at first.

After Victoria's Secret we went in several clothing stores. Dawn had the first couple measure me and they all told her that she could find what I needed in the juniors section. "Spike and Wes might not be happy when they get this bill. But you need clothes. Plus, if you can help me stay headache free, they probably won't mind." Nodding at her I hoped that there would be more than that for me to earn my keep.

We then went to my last favorite store. I hated wearing shoes. Dawn said that I had to have at least four pairs. I thought that was a little excessive and told her that I didn't like to wear shoes ever. She said that I needed a pair of running shoes, a pair to wear around the office, black leather boots with heals, and a strappy pair of sandals.

Having decided to wear the sandals home since they were the least constricting we were on our way again. She asked if there was anything that I needed to get. I told her about some of the herbs and plants that I would like to get along with some amulet making supplies. She said that we could go to the magic shop downtown. We stopped there and whatever they did not have that I needed they said that they would special order the items and have them delivered to the office on Wednesday. Dawn nodded. There were several seeds that I needed to start a garden. She then told me as we were leaving that the magic shop owner let them have whatever they needed at little to no cost because Spike and Wesley had taken care of a nest of Gnarl demons that decided to nest beneath the magic shop.

When we got back to the office there was a very large drink cup outside of the door with a handwritten note on top of it. Both of our hands were loaded and it had already gotten dark outside. Dawn said that Spike should be awake by now. We had more loaded into our hands than we should be carrying but neither one of us wanted to make a second trip. She got the door unlocked and yelled for Spike.