Who: JJ Monroe, Felix Strand-Weissman What: JJ gets a visitor! ...in jail. When: Monday, August 5 2019 | 3 pm Where: AWC Building, Billings, MT Warnings: Some language, a lot of sads with a side order of plot
The last day had been a haze of fear and confusion for JJ.
She'd woken up in an unfamiliar place, in a diffuse sort of pain that told her she'd been recently healed, and no clue how she'd gotten there. Nor why she wasn't being allowed to leave. It had been the middle of the night, and she'd yelled until someone came to shush her up and remind her that she was being held for questioning and potential charges of destruction of government interest and public property, as well as breaking the statute of secrecy, and endangering lives. This had effectively stunned her into dumbfounded silence until well into the next day.
That was when she'd remembered that she should at least have a phone call she could make. The idea of reaching out to her family all the way in Nashville had flashed across her mind, but there was literally nothing they could have done from there. The last thing she wanted was to disappoint them by telling them she'd wound up in jail—or close enough to it; this was a thought that extended to Will as well, not to mention Derry. Finally, she'd settled on Felix, having forgotten right up 'til the moment the phone began to ring that he was supposed to be in Brazil.
[Felix] Hello? [JJ] Hey. Hi. Sorry. Y'all are on your honeymoon. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be botherin' you. [Felix] No, I'm back, actually. Nat had her baby. And anyway, you're never a bother. [a pause] What's wrong? [JJ] W-what? I didn't think she was d— Is she okay? And the baby? [Felix] She's fine. They're both fine. Long story that I won't get into right now, because I can tell something's wrong. Talk to me, JJ. [JJ] [a long pause] I'm in trouble, Fee. [Felix] I have a lot of experience with trouble, love. What do you need? [JJ] I'm in holding in Billings. They're sayin' [a deep, shuddering breath] They're sayin' I'm the reason bad stuff's been happenin' at the Reserve. That I'm the one who made the wards breakdown. [Felix] Holding—shite. But that's— [a lengthy pause] Do you have people you need me to call? Because JJ, that's—shite. Okay. Not my first tangle with the law, either. You tell me who you want pulled into this, and I'll handle it. Family? A lawyer? Do you have one? [JJ] I don't— [a sniffle, and then very obvious audible clues that she's started crying] Not family. I dunno. I used to have one. A lawyer, I mean, but I don't think I do now. Felix, I don't know what to do. [Felix] All right. You just focus on breathing. I'll figure out the lawyer thing, and then we will figure out what to do. [JJ] Fee, I don't— [a moment as she pulled herself together] Okay. Okay. I didn't... [she went on in a whisper] I don't remember. [Felix] I'm going to take care of you, all right? No matter what they think they know, or that you don't know or remember. I'm going to make some calls, and then I will be there. Today. Is there anything I can bring you? [JJ] I-I don't know. Maybe some clothes? I don't know how any of this works. I—thank you, Fee. I really didn't know who else to call. [Felix] You can always call me. [a pause] What do you want me to tell Derry? [JJ] [a sniffle] Don't... I.... [a quiet sob] Tell him whatever you want. [Felix] Oh, love, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry more. I won't tell him anything right now other than you're okay. Then when we get this sorted out, you can tell him the whole story. [JJ] Yeah. Yeah, okay. See you soon? [Felix] Yes. Breathe. I'll see you this afternoon.
If not for Felix's absolute certainty in JJ's innocence—regardless of what the Aurors might ultimately say she'd done—things might have been left in a more tense situation with Njall than he liked. As it was, his husband's protective nature was on high alert, so the mere suggestion of someone being involved in the incident that had almost made him miss his daughter's birth was enough to set it off. Felix hated the thought of leaving him right now regardless, but at least he had the very pleasant distraction of Zarya. The truth was that Felix hadn't entirely figured out how he was supposed to fit into this stage of their crazy family anyway, so it was probably good for him to get some space. Besides, JJ was one of the few people for whom he'd drop everything, and he wasn't going to let her down now.
He'd called Elsie, because she was the first person who came to mind when he thought of hunting down a lawyer who didn't strictly handle Healer Board issues, and also for navigating the world of American Aurors. She'd only stayed on the line long enough to ask after Zarya—of whom she'd already seen at least half a dozen pictures that morning—and then she was off making calls of her own, because that was just the sort of woman she was. Felix had no doubt that JJ would have an excellent lawyer within only a few hours.
He kissed Njall goodbye, had a smile for Nat and touch of a tiny hand for Zarya, made a detour at the bunkhouse for a change of clothes, sent a text off to Derry, and then he was off to Billings. Convincing the Aurors that he needed to see JJ was by far the most difficult part of the entire afternoon so far, but they eventually were convinced. He was pretty sure it was so that they could monitor the entire conversation and see what they could get out of JJ, but he didn't care.
They made him wait a little longer, and when they finally brought him back, JJ was already in the interrogation room. He'd already been told he wasn't allowed to touch her, but when he sat down and put his arms on the table, he accidentally let his hand brush one of hers. Fuck the Aurors and their rules in this, seriously. "How are you holding up, love? I brought some clothes for you. They're checking them over first, but I'm sure they'll let you have them."
From her red-lined and puffy eyes, it was beyond obvious that JJ had done very little but cry on and off for most of the day, with a big emphasis on on. That tiny touch was almost enough to set her off again, but she swallowed it back with some difficulty and gave Felix a nod. A shrug followed that, which hid a universe of words she wasn't saying. "I'm runnin' out of new and creative ways to say 'I don't know' and 'I don't remember.' Maybe you can leave me with some before you"—she paused as her face screwed itself up; she had to look toward the cracked ceiling just to keep more tears at bay—"before you have to go. How's baby Z? Is Nat okay? What happened?"
Felix nodded. He wanted to start asking questions immediately, figure out what had brought her to this place so they could fix it, but he could see that she was on the edge of breaking down. Better to ease her into it, then. "They're both fine. Nat went into labor unexpectedly last night. We got a text about...I don't know, middle of the night sometime. Rushed back and were just in time for Zarya to be born." He was leaving out all of the most stressful parts, but the last thing he wanted was to add a worry to what JJ already had. It was one thing to be concerned about her accusation in general, but another to add personal things to it. "The healer's keeping both of them for a couple of days, since Zarya was early, but he said there's no immediate problems. She's quite small"—he held his hands out in an approximation of the baby's size, because he couldn't remember what they'd said about weight and length and all that—"but she screams like she's fully grown." He smiled a bit at that, even knowing that it probably wouldn't be something to smile about after a few days at home with it.
Somehow, this made her laugh, and she loved Felix so much in that moment that it nearly physically hurt. "Best get used to that being your life for the next, oh, say, three to four years? And then she'll add words to the mix, and you'll be truly doomed then." JJ's teasing grin faded quickly as her own words rattled around in her head. A pressure was starting to build again inside of her. She wanted so many answers, but didn't even know where to start. It was ridiculous to assume that no one was listening, so she asked anyway. Knowing had to be better with the gaping blank spot that filled her head. "How's the Reserve? Did… Was anyone hurt?"
"Oh, you know me. Words, I can do. The screaming kind of terrifies me." It was a joke, but also probably the most truthful thing he'd said on the topic. There wasn't time to think about that just now, though. Felix was glad that at least she'd brought the conversation around to this herself. "I don't really know a lot of details. Njall got the text notification about a containment breach in the dragon enclosure, but didn't even see it until the next morning with the time difference and all. We were back here pretty early today, and security seemed...agitated, I suppose. But I haven't heard anything about injuries." He leaned forward a little. "What happened to you? That you remember, I mean?"
After another smile, this one far more brief than its predecessor, JJ's face went positively ashen as Felix gave her the highlights of the evening. Her stomach roiled, and for a second she thought she was about to be really sick. Pressing her fingers to her mouth and taking several deep breaths forced the feeling down. She kept her hand there as she shook her head and then lowered it slowly. "I-I woke up here. In a cell. Before that? I remember Nat's party, but that's about it. I keep tellin' 'em that I can't recall a blessed thing from yesterday. It's just"—she broke off with a laugh that was filled with the same kind of disbelief she knew the Aurors were likely holding right now—"nothin'. But why should they believe me? They—they said it was my wand. The Brightstars saw me usin' my wand on a ward, and then everything went kerblooey."
Felix frowned as she explained, partly because it was entirely unhelpful—and he was sure it made the Aurors believe her story even less—and and partly because the space of time she was describing was so much more than the previous lapses in memory that he'd noticed. At most, he'd observed her forgetting half an hour, never an entire day. "The Brightstars?" Kent had been in the medical wing with the rest of them and hadn't mentioned anything, so he suspected it hadn't been him. "Zophie? The one who's heading up the investigation? Or the others?" If he was going to get to the bottom of things, this was important information to have.
After a brief pause for her answer on that, he pressed forward with the questions surging through his head. "Have you ever talked to anyone about your memory issues before? A professional, I mean." He really wished he could hold her hand just now, because he hated having to ask these things. "I'm entirely sure that they misunderstood what was happening, but having someone who could vouch for the truth of your not remembering could really help you."
"It was a coupla the others. The Doc's brother and oldest sister, the one with all the tattoos. Dumah, I think is what they called her. She's an auror too, and I guess I resisted arrest or somethin', 'cause when I woke up it felt like someone'd fixed my leg and my nose." JJ gave him a helpless little shrug. "It's like it's their word against mine, except their word is backed up by eyewitnessing and the last spells they could get outta my wand." Her gaze dropped, and her stomach knotted itself. She went on quietly. "They said they found a memory mod from a few days back. I-I don't think I'd do it to myself."
Tears tracked down her cheeks despite her best efforts as she squeezed her eyes shut. "Back when it started, yeah. I mentioned it to my manager at the time, and he got me in to see a specialist. They said it was stress related black-outs. That's when I decided to call it quits, pack it all in to see if I could get it to stop. And it did, for a while, and I came here, because if I couldn't do the one thing I loved, maybe I could do somethin' I liked instead, but we see how that's wound up, don't we?" She brushed the heel of her palm roughly across her cheek. Slowly, she leaned in, and dropped her voice for all the non-good it would do. "What if they're right? What if I've done all these awful things? Fee, I love the Reserve. I feel like y'all are family. It would kill me if I found out I've been doin' somethin' to it. If I've hurt people."
Rafe and Uma. Felix remembered them from conversations more than actual interactions, though he did know that Uma, at least, had been at the baby shower this past weekend. Merlin, had that been only two days ago? He resisted the urge to scrub a hand over his eyes, afraid that the gesture would somehow make him more tired than he felt already. "Someone modified your mem—" He stopped, facing screwing up in confusion. "Wait, they think you modified someone's memories?" He barely stopped himself before that information brought out far more swear words than was really helpful.
"Make sure you give the names to your lawyer, when he or she gets here. I haven't met them, but I've got a friend calling in the best. You should have someone tomorrow, at the latest." At that broken tone in her voice, though, Felix reached for her hand, wrapping it in his without a second thought. Fuck the Aurors. They could come in and arrest him, too, if they wanted. "You would never hurt people, okay? Never, okay? We are going to figure out what is happening here, and then you'll be back at work and we can forget all about this." The vehemence never left his voice as he spoke, but under those words were a million swirling thoughts trying to make sense of what this could mean.
A shallow nod was the only thing JJ could give him as a reply, and she squeezed his hand before slipping hers free. The last thing she wanted was for him to get into trouble. As much as she desperately wanted to, JJ couldn't bring herself to believe in his certainty. Not when there was a mountain of evidence already against her. All she had were large swaths of time where nothing existed, and who on earth was ever going to think that was anything but a convenient lie. Her breath caught, and she tried for a smile that was actually halfway successful. "You should get outta here. I'm sure that husband of yours needs you right now way more than I do. And you've already done so much. Way more than I ever shoulda asked."
She struggled with her next words, but had to drag them out. "If you talk to Derry, tell him I—tell him I'm so sorry. No one else needs to be dragged into my nonsense."
"That husband of mine only has eyes for his daughter right now, as it should be," Felix said, giving her a pointed look. "You should know by now that you're on my short list. Njall, my littlest sister, and you." Nat and Zarya now, too, probably...but they had Njall to lean on before Felix was ever going to be the one who had to step up. "So none of this 'shouldn't have' nonsense. If ever I possibly can do for you, I always will, all right?"
He shook his head as he stood, knowing that she was right about him needing to go. If the Aurors had been listening in, he doubted they had heard anything they hadn't already, but he didn't want to chance her somehow incriminating herself further. Once the lawyer got here the next day, she'd have some private consultation time with them. "I tried to tell Njall that, too, and look where it's gotten me." He flashed his wedding ring and a brief smile. "I bet that there's exactly one person in Snowcap who's had experience with being accused of a crime and later proven innocent, and you're looking at him. I do understand, and that is exactly why you'll be seeing me again very soon." He kissed his fingertips and held them in her direction.
With a trembling smile, JJ stayed seated, but repeated the gesture right back at him. "I think you should know that I thank God every day for you. I don't think it was a coincidence that put you in my path that day on the Reserve in the cold and the snow and the venomous icicles." This wasn't goodbye, but it felt so much like it that all she wanted to do was lay down and cry. She had no idea what her life could possibly be like after any of this. "I'll see ya."